I skirt around Broderick and walk out of the bathroom and into the closet. It’s become a mishmash of the three of ours clothing and items, Monroe’s spilling over mine and Broderick’s the same way she spills over us in real life, touching every part of my life and making it hers.
My throat is so tight, I can barely breathe.
Maybe it will all be for nothing. All this worrying about the future and things will end tomorrow when they learn the truth. Broderick might be getting along fine enough with Monroe right now, but he has such strong opinions about the other factions. They’re his enemies.
Will he see me as an enemy once he knows I grew up as an Amazon?
And Monroe?
No matter how she feels about me, she’s not going to thank me for shining the light on the seedy underbelly of the Amazon faction that she doesn’t seem to realize exists. For such a savvy woman, she has an intense lack of perception when it comes to certain elements. I don’t know if her mother intentionally keeps these things from her, but Aisling’s two interactions with me seem to indicate that’s the case.
I yank on a pair of sweats and a T-shirt that I only realize is Broderick’s when it hits me at mid-thigh. I turn and jump to find him behind me. “You’ve got to stop lurking in doorways. It’s creepy.” The joke comes out flat.
Broderick doesn’t hesitate. He steps forward and pulls me into his arms, hugging me tightly. “I know this isn’t an ideal situation, but I’m really fucking grateful to be in it all the same.” He presses a kiss to my temple. “I don’t think we would have ever become more than friends without Monroe involved.”
That’s the other thing I’m worried about, the one I can barely give voice. I wrap my arms around him and hug him back. “What if we don’t work without her?” Broderick tenses, but I keep going. “What if she and I don’t work without you? Have either of you thought of that?”
He hugs me tighter. “Yeah. I’ve thought about that.”
I wait, but he doesn’t provide anything more. It almost makes me laugh, but not like anything is funny. I finally lean back and look at up him, taking in his troubled expression. “What happens then?”
“I don’t know.” He smooths my hair back from my face. Amazing how quickly I’ve gotten used to touching and being touched by Broderick like this. It feels so natural, it makes my heart ache.
“Do you…” I should leave it alone, but too much hurts right now. There’s nothing to stop me. “Will you miss her when she’s gone?”
For a long moment, I don’t think he’ll answer me. But he finally sighs. “Yeah. I’ll miss the little witch.”
This is so ridiculous. Why did we do this to ourselves, knowing this couldn’t last? I start to ask, but apparently there is a limit to my need to poke this thing until we’re all in agony. I want to kiss him, to provide the way for us to spend a few hours distracted and happy, but it feels dishonest considering what I’m revealing tomorrow.
Instead, I hug Broderick tighter and press my face to his shoulder. “Can we have a low-key night? Maybe co-opt the movie room and watch something mindless and distracting?”
He cups the back of my head. “Sure. Whatever you want.”
I want forever.
A child’s cry. I learned a long time ago that childish fantasies have no place in the real world. The real world is rough and horrible and all too cruel. Even in love. Maybe especially in love.
Monroe comes into the closet a few minutes later, her blond hair wrapped in a towel and a second one around her body. She eyes us. “What’s the verdict?”
“Movie night.”
Her slow smile has me reconsidering my choice to keep things tame. “Let’s watch DOA: Dead or Alive.”
Broderick releases me with a laugh. “You would want to watch that movie. It’s all tits and ass and half-naked women.”
“Exactly.” She drops the towel and pulls on a pair of Broderick’s gym shorts and a tank top that I’m nearly certain is mine. “It’s also about the power of lady friendship and also the dad is super supportive of his daughter’s sexuality. You can’t tell me that’s not progressive, especially for its time.”
I blink. “That movie is entirely fan service. Just like the video game.”
“It can be both. Goodness, you two, expand your horizons.” She pulls the towel off her head and gives her hair a shake. “Though I’m willing to take other suggestions if you have them.”
“After that argument? No way.” I find myself smiling, some of my stress abating. I can do this. I can focus on the here and now and leave the future to the future. If it means I have to squirrel away every little memory I can to hold against the moment when we inevitably fall apart, then that’s what I’ll do.
It takes us a little time to get dinner squared away, but then we head into the movie room, carting along a wide array of what Monroe insists are vital movie-watching snacks. She was incredibly put out that we didn’t have Milk Duds stashed in the kitchen, but we made do with popcorn, hot tea, cookies, and some licorice.
Monroe and I end up on either side of Broderick, the best position to reach the food we have placed in front of him, and it’s so…easy. So fucking easy. She and Broderick exchange good-natured barbs, and I can’t shake the feeling that they’re putting in a little extra effort to comfort me.
The movie is hot garbage, but it’s incredibly enjoyable, especially with Monroe’s ongoing commentary and Broderick’s commentary about her commentary.
I want this forever.
It’s really a shame that I’m about to drop a bomb on our happy
