“Sure thing, sir.” He could already think of several likely candidates.
When their talk moved on to other matters, Tony looked at his lieutenant and Rafe. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve gotta run,” he said, standing as he downed the remainder of his lukewarm coffee.
While he’d slept a few hours after their last run, he already had a sleep deficit from picking up an extra shift each week since returning. Just one more to make up for the guys who had covered for him. Even though his lieutenant had told him to catch up over time, Tony didn’t like that they’d had to drop everything to cover for him during his unplanned leave and wanted to reciprocate as early as possible.
“Tony, if you can spare another minute or two after we’re finished here,” Rafe said.
Glancing at his watch, Tony saw he should have left for Aspen half an hour ago, but he nodded his agreement and grabbed a doughnut from the box on the counter.
He supposed Carm wouldn’t mind him being a little later for their hike. Today, they planned to hike the Maroon Bells nature area then have dinner in Aspen. He hadn’t promised anything more than the day and evening, though. Then he’d probably head home. Even though he’d made it through their first two nights sleeping together without any nightmares while at the villa, Tony wasn’t sure he was ready to try again. While he was fairly certain they had more than a sexual attraction going for them, he wanted to take it slower with Carmella than he had with any other woman. He’d been in so many shallow relationships in the past. Hell, relationships was a stretch. More like brief encounters.
Carmella deserved better than that.
He’d let her decide if and when they had sex again. Not that he’d turn down an invitation to join her in bed. Thoughts of her hot, sexy body drove him to distraction at the most inopportune and inappropriate times. Like now.
After about ten minutes, Rafe stood, faced Tony, and nodded toward his office where he headed without a word. Typical big brother, he expected Tony to be at his beck and call. Tony followed.
At least Rafe usually was a man of few words. “Sure, Bro.” He followed Rafe inside where his brother closed the door behind him.
“Have a seat.”
“Make it quick. I need to get going. I have a date.”
Rafe shook his head with a grin. “Who’s the latest Tony conquest?”
Tony didn’t like having Carmella grouped together with his other women as if she were another notch in his belt, so he ignored the remark. Saying something in her defense would only get Rafe’s radar up, and Tony wasn’t ready to tell his brother about his time with Carmella. “You said this would only take a couple minutes.”
Rafe’s eyes opened wider, then he nodded. His serious expression made Tony a little nervous until Rafe gave him a rare smile. “I don’t know what happened during your week off, but I’ve noticed a huge change since you’ve returned.”
Tony hadn’t told anyone where he’d gone or that he’d been with Carmella. None of their business. Besides, he wasn’t ready to reveal that he might be dating Angelina’s sister-in-law or to talk about the amazing time they’d spent together in the Caribbean. If his siblings or coworkers found out, he’d take a lot of flak about him screwing a nice woman like Carmella and dumping her the way he did all the women he’d dated.
To say nothing of how Marc would react, probably similar to the way the Giardano brothers had when Marc had given Angelina such a rough time in the beginning of their relationship. Overprotective big brothers could be unforgiving.
Would Tony eventually dump Carmella? He hoped not, but he didn’t exactly have a good track record with women. But he’d never felt like this about a woman before. No one compared to Carmella.
Tony brought his focus back to the meeting with his brother so he could get out of here. “All of you were right. I did need some time off to gain a new perspective on things. The timing couldn’t have been better. I happened to meet some brothers in a dive class who shared their success with their own fire-department dive teams. They even got me into a dive rescue class with them.”
“Where’d you go diving?”
“Nowhere you’d know about.”
Rafe’s eyes narrowed, as if he could tell Tony was keeping something from him. But Rafe didn’t pursue it. “Well, sounds like it was meant to be. Whatever you’re doing, keep it up. I’m damned proud of you for finding a way to make a difference after that bad call two months ago.”
Hearing that his big brother was proud of him boosted Tony’s morale even more. “Took me a while to figure it out, but the nightmares have stopped…” he knocked on the wooden desk, “…and I feel like I have purpose in life again.” Not just with the dive team but with Carmella. “I promise I won’t make another mistake.”
“No one ever thought or said you made a mistake, Tony. We can’t save them all.”
Tony’s throat tightened up thinking about the examples his brothers had set in their shared vocation. Tony had big shoes to fill.
Tony nodded, although he accepted the fact that he couldn’t change what had happened. He could only go forward making sure it didn’t happen again, if at all possible.
“However,” Rafe continued, “we do save the majority. Focus on that. We’re making a difference day in and day out by doing what we do. I’m glad you can see that again.”
Before this conversation got any mushier, Tony stood. “Listen, I’ve really gotta run now.”
“Sure. Get some sleep. You had a busy night.”
Tony didn’t respond, not wanting to lie outright, but nodded. No sense saying he didn’t plan to sleep much if Carm invited him to spend the night.
He left the station and headed toward
