Confusion flooded my thoughts, the expression on his face growing more distraught. “Why are you asking me that, Noah?”
He sighed. “It happened before I knew you… Before our pact.”
“What happened?”
“I saw a man in the woods.”
“What are you talking about? What man?”
“He was older. Fifties, maybe. Bald. He approached me that first day, when I’d gone to get coconuts. He gave me the note, the one about killing each other to escape, asked me to put it down somewhere everyone would find it.”
My blood ran cold. “So, you’ve been the one leaving notes?”
“Just the one,” he said quickly. “Just that one. I have no idea who’s been leaving the rest, but it wasn’t me. He told me that we were part of an experiment and that someone had to kill everyone in order to escape. Last man standing and all that… That was what he said. I thought he was kidding at first, but then he led me to the coconuts and the falls, and told me I should keep them a secret. Said it would give me an upper hand and that I couldn’t trust any of you—”
“That’s what the woman told me…”
“And I didn’t know you then. Any of you. So, I kept the secret. But then the closer we got, I worried that telling you would break the trust you had with me.”
“Have you seen the man again?”
“No,” he said, shaking his head. “Just that once. But…there was one more thing. He told me that whoever does the killing, they won’t get in trouble. He said they’ll be protected and…” He grimaced. “Taken care of.”
“What does that mean?” I asked, feeling horrified that Noah had known this all along, but also even more confused than before. What kind of sick experiment was this?
“He didn’t elaborate. He shoved the note in my hand and disappeared. Said if I followed him, he’d kill me himself and save you all the trouble.” He shuddered. “I believed him. About everything… Which means, if you want to go home, go back to your life…”
As realization set in about what he was offering, I began to feel sick. “Noah, come on. You know I’d never agree to anything like that.”
“Just hear me out, okay? I’m not making this offering lightly. I’d never have offered before when it was the four or five of us because, well, it was just too complicated, and I worried it would make things even worse. No one would ever agree on who could be the winner—”
“Winner’s a generous term for it.” I scoffed.
“But now that it’s just us.” He licked his lips. “Look, if you say you want to be with me, here on this island, or that you think you could want that in the future—ever—more than you want to be with your husband, then I’ll let it go. But you have someone waiting for you back home.”
“You have your parents and—”
“My parents are getting older. They have each other. I’m not saying I want to lose them, but you have so much more at stake here, so if you’d be happier returning, if you’d be happier back at home… There’s a way to make that happen.”
“By killing you?” I asked, my mouth gaped open in horror. “Noah, I could never—”
“You wouldn’t have to do it.”
“Why are you even talking like this?” I stood up, shaking my head and walking away from him. He jogged up behind me.
“I don’t mean to upset you. I just want you to know it’s an option. I wanted to be honest with you.”
“It’s always been an option. It’s not like there was really any doubt about what was going on here, not since that first note. And especially not since going to the cliff house. We’ve known for a while now that any of us could’ve ended it… But we have a deal. A pact. And I appreciate you telling me the truth about it, but it’s not like you really did anything wrong. I don’t want you to die, Noah. Our friends just died, and I’m barely standing.” I stopped, looking up at him. “I can’t even think about this right now.”
I stopped in my tracks, looking out over the ocean. “Do you…” Was I seeing things? Was I imagining it? “Do you see that?”
He followed my line of vision, squinting his eyes as if to help him see better. “Oh my god,” he said, rushing forward toward the shore as I took off as well.
“Is he…” I couldn’t bear to think it, let alone say it, for fear of jinxing it. Please. Please. Please.
In the distance, I could see James floating on a stray log that hadn’t yet made its way to the shore. He had one thick arm and his head draped across the wood, his body floating lifelessly. He’d been out there all along. Waiting for us to save him. But were we too late?
Without hesitation, Noah rushed into the water, paddling out to him as fast as he could while fighting the waves as they tried to pull him back toward me. Please. Please. Please.
I repeated the mantra over and over in my head, bouncing up and down on my tiptoes as I watched the scene unfold. I wanted to get to him. I wanted to help him. But I also knew my swimming skills were elementary at best and, should I try to help, the likelihood was that I’d end up being more of a liability to him in the end.
So, I watched. I waited. I prayed to a god I’d long since given up on.
Please. Please. Please.
At long last, as he reached the log, he took hold of James’s arm, tossing it over his shoulder and lugging him backward, moving at a snail’s pace, both their heads barely above the water as
