The Taming of the Shrew

music we have spent an hour,
Your lecture shall have leisure for as much. Lucentio

Preposterous ass, that never read so far
To know the cause why music was ordain’d!
Was it not to refresh the mind of man
After his studies or his usual pain?
Then give me leave to read philosophy,
And while I pause, serve in your harmony.

Hortensio Sirrah, I will not bear these braves of thine. Bianca

Why, gentlemen, you do me double wrong,
To strive for that which resteth in my choice:
I am no breeching scholar in the schools;
I’ll not be tied to hours nor ’pointed times,
But learn my lessons as I please myself.
And, to cut off all strife, here sit we down:
Take you your instrument, play you the whiles;
His lecture will be done ere you have tuned.

Hortensio You’ll leave his lecture when I am in tune? Lucentio That will be never: tune your instrument. Bianca Where left we last? Lucentio

Here, madam:

“Hic ibat Simois; hic est Sigeia tellus; Hic steterat Priami regia celsa senis.”

Bianca Construe them. Lucentio “Hic ibat,” as I told you before, “Simois,” I am Lucentio, “hic est,” son unto Vincentio of Pisa, “Sigeia tellus,” disguised thus to get your love; “Hic steterat,” and that Lucentio that comes a-wooing, “Priami,” is my man Tranio, “regia,” bearing my port, “celsa senis,” that we might beguile the old pantaloon. Hortensio Madam, my instrument’s in tune. Bianca Let’s hear. O fie! the treble jars. Lucentio Spit in the hole, man, and tune again. Bianca

Now let me see if I can construe it:

“Hic ibat Simois,” I know you not, “hic est Sigeia tellus,” I trust you not; “Hic steterat Priami,” take heed he hear us not, “regia,” presume not, “celsa senis,” despair not.

Hortensio Madam, ’tis now in tune. Lucentio All but the base. Hortensio

The base is right; ’tis the base knave that jars.
Aside. How fiery and forward our pedant is!
Now, for my life, the knave doth court my love:
Pedascule, I’ll watch you better yet.

Bianca In time I may believe, yet I mistrust. Lucentio

Mistrust it not: for, sure, Aeacides
Was Ajax, call’d so from his grandfather.

Bianca

I must believe my master; else, I promise you,
I should be arguing still upon that doubt:
But let it rest. Now, Licio, to you:
Good masters, take it not unkindly, pray,
That I have been thus pleasant with you both.

Hortensio

You may go walk, and give me leave a while:
My lessons make no music in three parts.

Lucentio

Are you so formal, sir? well, I must wait,
Aside. And watch withal; for, but I be deceived,
Our fine musician groweth amorous.

Hortensio

Madam, before you touch the instrument,
To learn the order of my fingering,
I must begin with rudiments of art;
To teach you gamut in a briefer sort,
More pleasant, pithy and effectual,
Than hath been taught by any of my trade:
And there it is in writing, fairly drawn.

Bianca Why, I am past my gamut long ago. Hortensio Yet read the gamut of Hortensio. Bianca

Reads. “ ‘Gamut’ I am, the ground of all accord,
‘A re,’ to Plead Hortensio’s passion;
‘B mi,’ Bianca, take him for thy lord,
‘C fa ut,’ that loves with all affection:
‘D sol re,’ one clef, two notes have I:
‘E la mi,’ show pity, or I die.”

Call you this gamut? tut, I like it not:
Old fashions please me best; I am not so nice,
To change true rules for old inventions.

Enter a Servant. Servant

Mistress, your father prays you leave your books
And help to dress your sister’s chamber up:
You know to-morrow is the wedding-day.

Bianca Farewell, sweet masters both; I must be gone. Exeunt Bianca and Servant. Lucentio Faith, mistress, then I have no cause to stay. Exit. Hortensio

But I have cause to pry into this pedant:
Methinks he looks as though he were in love:
Yet if thy thoughts, Bianca, be so humble
To cast thy wandering eyes on every stale,
Seize thee that list: if once I find thee ranging,
Hortensio will be quit with thee by changing. Exit.

Scene II

Padua. Before Baptista’s house.

	Enter Baptista, Gremio, Tranio, Katharina, Bianca, Lucentio, and others, attendants.
Baptista	To Tranio. Signior Lucentio, this is the ’pointed day. That Katharine and Petruchio should be married, And yet we hear not of our son-in-law. What will be said? what mockery will it be, To want the bridegroom when the priest attends To speak the ceremonial rites of marriage! What says Lucentio to this shame of ours?
Katharina	No shame but mine: I must, forsooth, be forced To give my hand opposed against my heart Unto a mad-brain rudesby full of spleen; Who woo’d in haste and means to wed at leisure. I told you, I, he was a frantic fool, Hiding his bitter jests in blunt behaviour: And, to be noted for a merry man, He’ll woo a thousand, ’point the day of marriage, Make feasts, invite friends, and proclaim the banns; Yet never means to wed where he hath woo’d. Now must the world point at poor Katharine, And say, “Lo, there is mad Petruchio’s wife, If it would please him come and marry her!”
Tranio	Patience, good Katharine, and Baptista too. Upon my life, Petruchio means but well, Whatever fortune stays him from his word: Though he be blunt, I know him passing wise; Though he be merry, yet withal he’s honest.
Katharina	Would Katharine had never seen him though! Exit weeping, followed by Bianca and others.
Baptista	Go, girl; I cannot blame thee now to weep; For such an injury would vex a very saint, Much more a shrew of thy impatient humour.
	Enter Biondello.
Biondello	Master, master! news, old news, and such news as you never heard of!
Baptista	Is it new and old too? how may that be?
Biondello	Why, is it not news, to hear of Petruchio’s coming?
Baptista	Is he come?
Biondello	Why, no, sir.
Baptista	What then?
Biondello	He is coming.
Baptista	When will he be here?
Biondello	When he stands where I am and sees you there.
Tranio	But say, what to thine old news?
Biondello	Why, Petruchio is