That’s how it would be, Blake realized: lurching from one hasty decision to the next, wondering at every turn if it was already too late.
Jumoke flinched when Blake touched her sleeve. He said, “Tell me what you’ll need.”
She frowned. “What do you mean?”
“Clermont couldn’t make it to Jupiter, much less to another solar system. What’ll you need to failsafe the DED?”
“You don’t understand,” she said. “I’ve got to focus on getting people up to speed, here and on Earth. That’s the only way we’ll ever scale up the drive to accommodate colony-sized ships. It’s the only way we’ll go from a handcrafted prototype—a kludge, you once called it—to mass production.”
“Because it is a kludge,” he snapped back. “And a poorly understood kludge, which is why it drops offline every few days and why you cluttered my main engine room with sensors and lab gear. Face it, you’re needed aboard Clermont.”
“You’re right,” Jumoke said, almost in tears. “You’re right about all that. But I’m needed more here. So, you…”
“Me?”
Dennison smiled. “Do you begin, Mr. Westford, to understand the interview you just had?”
“I’m the backup DED expert?”
“Aren’t you?” Hawthorne asked. “You only need to keep the drive running, accumulate more flight time with it, do some fine-tuning. No one expects you to explain it. Dr. Boro assured us you are familiar with her prototype, that without you she could never have integrated it into Clermont’s systems.”
“You and Jumoke worked side by side for three months,” Dana said. “You can do this, Blake, if anyone can.”
“More to the point,” Hawthorne said, “you can do it now. Anyone else would need training. You’ll have access to Dr. Boro by comm.”
“Time is of the essence,” Dennison added, keeping up the full-court press.
Better to die trying than die waiting, Blake knew. But nothing was ever that simple.
“As the tests continue,” he said, “we make longer flights. Correct? ‘Scout out the path to another solar system,’ I believe those were the governor’s words.”
Dennison nodded. “That’s what I said.”
“So at some point, we don’t come back.”
“You wouldn’t want to,” Dennison said. “Not if you plan to live. Quit dithering, Westford. Are you in?”
“You tell me.” Blake took a deep breath. “I’ll not desert my wife. If you want me, Rikki comes, too.”
5
“Surprise!”
Rikki Westford jerked to a halt in the doorway. Family and friends packed all she could see of her and Blake’s apartment. Mom wriggled through the living-room crowd to give her a hug. Dad, tending bar in the dining room, raised a beer stein in salute. Her three surviving grandparents grinned from the living-room sofa. Two nieces bounced and giggled on the loveseat. Even her ex was there in a corner.
It was all Rikki could do not to sob.
“Smile and go in,” Blake whispered from behind her. “For their sakes.”
Fighting back tears, she did her best. “Umm, hello, everyone.”
“Wow, we did surprise you,” Aunt Lucy said. “You’re not that good an actress.”
I’m not any kind of an actress, Rikki thought, but I need to be one now.
With a hand on the small of her back Blake guided her through the door. He slipped past her into the crowd. “Hi, everyone. How about a hint? Whose birthday or anniversary did I forget?”
The quip got a hearty chuckle, leaving Rikki to marvel how he did it. The ready charm she understood. That was just…Blake. But how did he keep on the brave face?
Aunt Lucy gave Blake a peck on the cheek. Like all Rikki’s relatives, she towered over him. “You two didn’t expect to sneak away to Titan without saying goodbye, did you?”
More like, sneak away to another star. But they couldn’t say that. The cover story, of a short-notice mission departing for Titan, already strained credulity.
More like, leave everyone behind to die.
“I suppose not,” Blake said. In a stage voice, he added, “Someone tell me. What does a guy have to do to get a drink in his own house?”
“I estimate about four meters this way,” Dad answered, laughing.
And another piece of Rikki’s heart died.
Her kid sister pressed through the crowd, towing by the hand a skinny, tattooed guy Rikki guessed was the latest boyfriend. Whoever he was, an apartment filled with Janna’s relatives seemed not to faze him. A serious BF, then.
You’re all doomed! Somehow, Rikki held the shriek inside.
“My, you’re quiet, Sis,” Janna said. “What’s up?”
“What’s up with you?” Rikki countered. “As in, who’s your…friend?”
“This is Glenn.” Janna slipped an arm around his waist and snuggled close. “As you would know if you hadn’t been holed up for the past three weeks. Glenn, meet my sister Rikki and her husband Blake.”
“Hi, guys,” Glenn said. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”
Blake offered his hand. “Glenn, I’m pleased to meet you. And though it pains me to admit it, you could do worse than Janna. You’d have to search high and low, but you could.”
“Good to know,” Glenn said as Janna mock-scowled at both men.
“I still need a beer,” Blake announced. “Can I bring anyone anything? No?” He headed to the other room.
Rikki left her greeting at “Hi.” She wanted to say, grab life while you can. She wanted to say, enjoy every day to the fullest, because so few days remain. She wanted to say—
“Here you go, hon.” When Blake returned, offering the beer she had not wanted, she shook her head. Alcohol would only make her sadder.
Glenn, with a grin, accepted her bottle. “Titan? Man, that’s far.”
“And cold,” Blake said. “But if Saturn is half as beautiful as Jupiter was, wow.” He and Glenn clinked bottles.
“So tell me, Sis. What’s a science historian do on Titan?”
“Are you kidding?” Rikki said. “The first crewed mission to Titan is history and science.”
“She’s a natural,” Blake said.
No, I’m an imposter, Rikki thought. Whether on the scouting mission or the colony ships to follow, science historian might be the last specialty anyone needed. But humanity needed scouts and the scouting mission needed Blake—she believed that, whether or not he did—and so she
