‘First fiddlesticks! Anyhow, it’s had two bites this evening – Florence and myself. The animal is not safe, I tell you.’
‘“The animal”, indeed! Fancy calling my Doglet “the animal”! Come here, my precious. The general isn’t safe: he wants to destroy you. Ralph dear, be an angel and put Doglet in the car, will you, till after dinner? Thank you so much. I do hope you’re not hurt, Florence?’
‘Yes, Louisa, the skin is broken and he has torn my stocking rather badly. A new pair! Of course it doesn’t signify. I must go and paint it with iodine. I only trust the animal has not got hydrophobia.’
She left the room angrily, General Murgatroyd opening the door for her with a gesture of exaggerated chivalry. Lord Prague, who had noticed nothing, went on eating.
‘I’m so sorry that Doglet should have caused all this commotion,’ said Mrs Fairfax. ‘The angel! So unlike him! I’ve never known him really to lose his temper before, but you wouldn’t believe how sensitive he is to dress. I ought to have remembered that pink georgette is the one material he simply cannot abide. In fact, all georgette is inclined to upset him; and dear Florence’s shoes, with those long pointed toes, would drive him distracted. Poor little sweet! He’ll be utterly miserable after this, I’m afraid.’
‘And he’d have reason to be if I had anything to do with him,’ muttered the general.
‘You must find this house very interesting, Albert,’ said Ralph, returning from his mission. ‘So exactly your period.’
‘Indeed, yes, I do,’ replied Albert earnestly. ‘And I would love to show you the wonderful things I have found here and collected together.’
‘No, dear Albert, I think I have suffered enough during the last few days from Victorian taste crystallized by the Almighty into the extraordinary scenery with which I have recently been surrounded. Not at all my period, dear. Corbusier, now –’
Here Sally gave the signal, as they say in books, for the ladies to leave the table, and presently took Mrs Fairfax upstairs to powder her nose.
‘You’ll stay the night, of course?’ she said.
‘Alas! no, my dear. Very sweet of you, but we’ve taken rooms at Gleneagles for tonight. I really must push on. I should like to reach London, if possible, tomorrow, as my husband is passing through for one day on his way to America and I want to see him about being divorced, you know.’
Sally’s murmured sympathy was waved aside.
‘It’s not been too successful, really – our marriage, I mean. I’m getting rather old for all the fuss and worry of having a husband, that’s the truth. And how’s yours getting on, my dear: still happy, are you? Has Walter settled down at all? I know you were rather worried about him at one time.’
‘We’re divinely happy,’ said Sally, ‘and it’s wonderful being here. He hasn’t a chance to spend any money and he’s been working harder than I’ve ever known him. You know, people are too hard on Walter. Of course he gives the impression of being all over the place, but that’s only because of his high spirits. And then, poor darling, he has no idea of the value of money, which is sometimes very annoying for me as I’m by nature rather stingy.’
‘I’ve hardly ever met a man who has any idea of the value of money,’ said Mrs Fairfax. ‘It’s one of the nice things about them. Now, women are nearly always mercenary creatures.’
‘Oh! And, by the way, of course, I’d quite forgotten it – I’m going to have a baby.’
‘Are you, Sally? Well, it does happen. Torture, my dear, but one looks lovely afterwards, which is a great consolation. I’ve had three, you know, and they all cut each other dead now; but they’re devoted to me, specially dear Bellingham. By the way, I’m told that Potts (my second husband) has taken a house near here – Castle Bane. Dreary creature, Potts, but Héloïse is a dream. She’s at the Lido now. I’m going out there really to see her. How lovely Jane was looking at dinner!’
‘Yes, wasn’t she? It’s a great secret, so don’t say I told you, but she’s engaged to Albert.’
‘My dear, you amaze me! Will that be a success?’
‘I really don’t know. They are very much in love at present; but Jane is terribly sensitive, and Albert so much wrapped up in his work that I can’t help feeling there will be trouble. So long as she understands his temperament – but I’m not sure how much she does. However, even if they’re happy for a year or two it’s more than lots of people get out of life.’
‘Yes, you’re perfectly right. I’ve lived through it and I know. I had two years of complete happiness with Cosmo, and about eighteen months with Campo Santo, and I can tell you that it makes all the rest of one’s life worth while. But I don’t really advise too much chopping and changing for most people: gets one into such restless habits. I couldn’t have stayed with Cosmo after … Well, never mind. So I thought if I can’t be happy I might as well be rich, and made off with Potts. Then, of course, I was bowled over by Campo Santo in ten minutes. Well, I always think that would have lasted, only the angel died on me quite suddenly: and there he was – Campo Santo in good earnest. It was dreadfully depressing. Still, there was little Bobs to cheer me up: quite the nicest of my children. Have you seen him? He’s still at Eton, the precious. He’s meeting me in Venice, too, when Héloïse leaves. They can’t endure each other. Not frightened about this baby, are you?’
‘Well, no, not really.’
‘You needn’t be; nobody dies in childbirth now, my dear. It’s considered quite vieux jeu. And it may be
