I thought back to the moment when I saw Caitlin fall into the water. Hackett had been nowhere near her. Then I thought of the mutterings that were coming from Caitlin just before she went into the pool. I felt my spine tingle as my mind raced with thoughts of the dead bodies in the basement and their spirits that could be haunting Saxby. Could a ghost have pushed Caitlin?
The sun was bright and I could have blamed the glare of the low afternoon sun for mistaking her next move, but from the lower corner of my eye, I caught sight of movement beneath the towel and swear I saw Caitlin’s little finger momentarily graze the side of Hackett’s hand. Her body language had shifted, and she seemed to be inching closer to him. My body felt icky and uncomfortable, yet I couldn’t speak to say anything, even though everything about what I was seeing was telling me that there was something not quite right.
‘It’s my birthday today, Hackett, do you remember?’
Hackett scratched his head with the hand that wasn’t close to Caitlin’s.
‘Birthday?’ he spoke. His voice was gruff yet childlike.
When I had asked Mum and Dad about him, Mum had said, ‘He’s what we call a bit special, love. He’s harmless, but don’t bother him too much, okay?’
It was the fact that my mum said I should consider myself when I was around him that bothered me. Back home, I had seen some of the dodgiest characters appear from nowhere, yet not once had my mother told me not to bother someone. I had a strong built-in instinct for when to move away from danger that my parents had instilled in me from an early age, yet here I was, hundreds of miles from where I should have felt real danger, feeling more uneasy than I ever had.
‘Yes, Hackett, birthday. Do you know what that means?’ Caitlin continued.
Hackett furrowed his brow as he looked down at Caitlin. ‘Both your birthdays.’ He pointed to me and then Caitlin. He looked confused and I could see his lips moving as he tried to think of the words he needed to say, but no more came.
I felt an urge to say, ‘It’s okay, I struggle to say what I need to say sometimes.’ But instead, I concentrated on the sensation of my arms prickling with heat and a swirl of sweat clinging to my lower back. I wanted to lift my hand up my vest to wipe it away, but I kept it pressed against my leg. I wondered if Caitlin was toying with him, making him suffer for his ignorance; his inability to understand the social situation he found himself in. Caitlin lifted her finger and had it pressed against her cheek.
‘No, silly Hackett. Just my birthday.’
‘But—’ Hackett went to speak, and this time I knew he had something else to say, but Caitlin interrupted him.
‘A birthday kiss for the birthday girl?’ She held her finger to her cheek.
Hackett made a sort of contented snorting sound as he registered what he was expected to do. He bent down, politely, and delicately planted a small peck on Caitlin’s cheek. I was rather surprised; due to his height and stature, I imagined he would be more forceful and clumsier with it. Once the deed had been done, Caitlin sat back down next to me.
‘Birthday kiss?’ Hackett moved towards me and sat on the grass as though he were about to re-enact the same kiss. I spurted out a loud laugh and jerked away.
‘No, Hackett, it’s just my birthday. Sasha’s birthday is in April.’ Caitlin laughed, and I felt a swell of pride that she had remembered.
Hackett grunted and walked away.
‘He tried to kiss me too! He thought it was my birthday as well,’ I said, looking at Caitlin through a breathless laugh, a combination of nerves and joy at her telling Hackett when my birthday was.
But she had a hard look on her face; she wasn’t laughing, and she didn’t seem to think it was funny.
I took a brief look back at Hackett as he walked away through the gate. Caitlin kicked her heels into the grass. I didn’t know why there was suddenly this tension between us. But I would find a way to make it right. I couldn’t bear the thought of Caitlin not wanting to be my friend. I was already learning that I could find a way to make her smile again and everything would be okay.
Even though Caitlin had been warned not to wander off too far, I thought half an hour couldn’t hurt.
‘Let’s go to the den and try and make fire by rubbing two sticks together!’
I saw Caitlin’s eye sparkle as she flung the towel to the ground. It was something her parents would almost certainly be against, and I knew she wouldn’t turn me down.
As we got up to move, something made me look up at the house, an intuition. My eyes were drawn to a window on the second floor where I saw a figure move backwards and I was almost certain it was Ava.
9 London, July 2009
Two months until the wedding
Things are looking up and I am once again thriving in full bridesmaid mode. I make sure I keep in contact with Caitlin every day because I firmly believe that the more contact we have, the less likely she is to pull away again. I knew that visiting Caitlin at her office had been the right thing to do. It was a journey that was long enough to show my dedication to our friendship, and Caitlin would know that. I can’t remember the last time she made it over to Fulham.
But that doesn’t matter because I am going to be the perfect bridesmaid and I am going to do my best to give Caitlin the best wedding. There will be
