‘I can only presume Caitlin has a friend who is unsure, who may change their mind at the last minute. Or perhaps it’s a plus one?’
‘Well, yes, yes, I’m sure.’ Ava holds my gaze and then the waiter comes over again.
‘Two soupe à l’oignon, and two sole, please.’ She looks at me briefly. I nod. She hands the menu to the waiter, who nods and leaves.
‘I hope you don’t mind me ordering for you. I know this place fairly well and those are two of the finest dishes.’ She looks at me and waits for my response.
I swallow down my annoyance. ‘They sound perfectly fine,’ I say, keeping my tone neutral and light.
Ava clasps her hands back in front of her again and begins to discuss the weather, before asking after Oscar – initially calling him Oliver, a slip-up I see straight through.
‘It’s a shame Caitlin could not bring herself to marry at a church. I know it’s not the thing these days, but I am rather old-fashioned. Always have been and always will be, I’m afraid.’
‘Yes, I always found you and your family to be very…’ I pause to think of the word. ‘Traditional,’ I say. ‘But I liked that about you all.’ I find myself adding without thought, and I watch as Ava’s face seems to soften for a moment, but before long, the hardened expression is back.
‘I know you did,’ Ava says after a beat. She then clears her throat and looks down at the table, focusing on the knife and fork that she carefully adjusts on her napkin.
‘How’s business, Sasha?’ Ava looks up brightly as I take a sip of my water, trying not to flinch at the bite of the sparkle; I would have opted for still.
‘Business is really good, thank you, Ava.’ I eye her suspiciously; it’s strange how she seems to have taken such an interest in my business recently.
‘You have a new client, no?’ She tries to make the comment sound throwaway.
‘I have. A model.’
‘Yes, yes, Roxy. Lovely girl,’ Ava says. ‘Of course, I’m not into all that vlogging – sounds very technical to me – but it’s strange how sometimes paths can cross.’
I feel my back prickle as I quickly begin to piece together what is happening.
‘I mean, I say I’m old-fashioned, but I do know a lot of people, who also know a lot of people.’ A small smile plays across her lips.
‘Are you saying it was you who put Roxy in touch with me?’ I say slowly as the realisation dawns.
‘It’s easy when you know people, Sasha. I could throw a few more clients your way if you feel you have the capacity to take on more work?’
I narrow my eyes at her.
The waiter is back at our table with our soups. The umami aroma hits my nostrils; a scent that would usually draw me in, now repulses me. The waiter steps to a small table next to him and lifts a humongous pepper grinder. He holds it up next to me, questioningly. I shake my head. Ava looks up and smiles graciously.
‘Oh yes, please.’
The waiter slowly begins grinding the pepper mill. The sound seems to reverberate around the room. I take a few deep breaths and try to calm down as the three of us are suspended in what feels like the longest few moments of my life.
Finally, Ava thanks the waiter, who does another slight head bow, and retreats from the table. Ava picks up her spoon and dips it in the soup.
‘Try it whilst it’s hot. It’s delicious.’
‘What. Do. You. Want,’ I seethe.
Ava looks up over her spoon, which was nearly at her mouth. Then she puts it in her mouth, swallows and dabs at her mouth with her napkin.
‘I want to know that everything is going to be okay. This mystery guest has thrown me, Sasha. I wish to feel at ease at my daughter’s wedding day, and I have to say, right now, I feel a little on edge.’
I try to cast my memory back to the guest list. I have a copy at home on an email. Why had I not noticed the unnamed guest before? I was too busy with favours and invites and hen holidays. And I suppose it was something I knew I didn’t need to really worry about. I had probably glanced over it to see which names stood out and then forgotten all about it.
‘Ava, I can assure you that I have no idea who Caitlin’s mystery guest is.’
Ava runs her tongue across her teeth and smacks her lips together. ‘Okay. Then we let that go to rest. Eat your soup, before it gets cold.’
I pick up my spoon, but my appetite is still frozen. I’m thinking about who Caitlin could possibly be inviting that she doesn’t wish me or Ava to know about. I had always wondered about this aspect of Caitlin, that like her strange behaviour as a child, she has always been able to spook me somehow. Then there was her cagey behaviour over the last year, which has become even more questionable as the wedding gets closer. I’m wondering if I’m not alone in my extracurricular activities. For what this chat with Ava has brought to light is that Caitlin could also be planning something behind my back.
14 Saxby House, Dorset, New Year’s Eve 1988
We sat around the fireplace in the main lounge; the adults had lit so many candles that it looked as though we were about to hold a seance. Beverly had brought out hot chocolate for us and glasses of brandy for the adults. ‘For the shock,’ Rayner had said when she put in the request to Beverly who nodded approvingly. ‘I mean it was quite alarming. One moment I was anticipating a soufflé, the next moment, I couldn’t see my hand in front of my face! I had
