Lilly choked on a sob and sank down into a chair. She covered her face with her free hand. “I’m so thankful you will always be with Fane, Jacque. You won’t have to ever endure this.”
“I would take it away from you if I could,” said Jacque, and Myanin could hear the ring of truth in it. The young woman loved her mother greatly; that much was clear.
Myanin watched as Lilly tried to pull herself together. “Perizada will be back tomorrow to drag me out of my chambers, whether or not I want to go. I’m trying, Jacque. I really am. I wish I could say that Peri’s threat is enough to get me moving, but it’s like everything in me has shut down. I don’t know how to move forward.”
“Dammit,” Jacque growled on the other end of the phone. “I wish I could help, Mom. And I know Peri has the best of intentions. But she can’t make you move past this. It has to be you. Something in you has to decide that you can’t stay hidden away. That sounds so bitchy, and I’m sorry. But it cannot be anyone else’s decision. Only yours. I keep trying to think of things you would say to me if I were in your shoes. You’ve always been good at pep talks. And I’m pretty sure I’m blowing this, but I just wish I could fix it.”
Lilly nodded and then seemed to realize her daughter couldn’t see her. “I know. I’ll figure it out. I promise.”
“If anyone can do this, it’s you.”
“Thank you. Give Slate a kiss for me, okay?” Lilly asked.
“Of course I will. Please come see us as soon as you can. I mean, no pressure, but maybe a little pressure.”
Lilly laughed. “Okay. I promise. I love you, kiddo.” Lilly ended the call and set the phone beside her.
Myanin watched as the warlock queen stood motionless, staring at the floor. She muttered something under her breath, but Myanin didn’t catch it. Instead, the djinn studied Lilly’s body language. Her shoulders slumped forward in defeat, her face lost and forlorn, and her hands trembled at her sides as if they needed to hold something but there was nothing left to hold. This was a woman who had lost not just one man, but two. She’d said that when Jacque’s father had left, she’d been able to move on, but it wasn’t the same with her soul mate. Losing her soul mate seemed to have knocked the queen on her ass, permanently.
Myanin watched Lilly wipe away more tears and felt a kindred spirit with the woman. The djinn knew what it was like to be frozen in a state of complete bleakness. Slowly, as if watching the dawn creep onto the horizon, Myanin began to have a realization. Yes, she’d been heartbroken when Thad left, much like Lilly had been about Dillon. But Myanin hadn’t been permanently stopped in her tracks. The grief she’d experienced wasn’t the same as she saw Lilly enduring now. That could only mean one thing—Thad was not her soul mate. It was as the Great Luna had said. Thadrick was not meant to be hers, no matter how badly she wanted him to be. Deep down, she’d probably known that all along. But until now, she’d not been able to face the truth. Even after the Great Luna had spoken to her, after admitting all of her guilt, there was a small part of her that still wanted to hold on to Thad and almost felt like she needed to. But standing here, watching the queen so lost without the other half of her soul, Myanin realized that what she felt for Thad was an imitation of the real thing. She didn’t want an imitation.
The truth came with a painful finality. She knew she’d never be with Thad. But there was another emotion walking hand in hand with the pain—freedom. A lot like the freedom she’d experienced when she finally confessed her transgressions. The weight was gone. It allowed her to breathe a little easier. Myanin felt as if a veil had been lifted from her eyes. The world, which she’d hadn’t even realized had been muted sepia, became crisp and vibrant to her once again.
Now, as the djinn stared at the distraught woman, empathy overwhelmed Myanin. To her surprise, she realized she wanted to help the queen. Call it female solidarity, or whatever, but she didn’t enjoy seeing this woman, this incredibly strong woman, so broken.
Myanin walked toward her.
“Hello, Queen Lilly,” she called. Myanin knew before she spoke the words that the queen wouldn’t be able to hear her. The djinn circled the oblivious female, thinking about what she might do to help. How could she shake the woman out of the grief? How could she force her to act like the queen she needed to be?
A plan began to formulate in her mind, as she smiled. She knew what to do. “See you soon, Queen,” she crooned. Then the djinn concentrated hard on her own consciousness. She wasn’t exactly sure how to transport herself out of this vision, but she assumed a strong infusion of willpower would do the trick.
Myanin felt the breath being ripped from her lungs as she focused on wanting to be in the present. All of her desire went into needing to be where she could begin to put her plan in motion, help and no longer hinder herself or anyone else. The pressure in her mind built and just when she thought her skull might explode, Myanin found herself once again sitting next to Tenia. She was breathing hard, and her heart felt like it was going to beat out of her chest. Tendrils of sweat trailed down Myanin’s neck as her skin began to heat. She felt Lyra’s magic undulating beneath her skin, seeking a way out.
“That was interesting.” Tenia said, her voice a little higher than usual.
“One second,” Myanin said as she tried to catch
