Rick wanted to stay in this library forever. To experience his life unfolding in a myriad of different ways. Each life experience showing him new discoveries about his own upbringing, about those he loved, about his choices, his regrets, his hopes and fears, about his very soul. He wanted to see how it could all play out differently, some better, some worse, but all infinitely fascinating and profoundly meaningful. He wanted to understand the very nature of his existence, in all possible forms.
But then he felt a strange sensation. Something was pulling him, something from far away. He could feel a touch, but he could not make out where it was originating from. Distant voices were now speaking to him, but he could not understand their words. They sounded far off. Then, the pull got stronger. He felt himself resist. He wasn’t ready to leave. There was so much more here for him to explore, to know, to understand.
The pull grew even stronger. The voices louder, more distinct. Then, he realized what it was. It was a call back to life.
He was still in his family home, but the details of it were starting to fade away.
“No,” he protested. “I’m not ready to go.”
The colors, shapes, textures and scents of his home continued to fade. The space grew and stretched out into a vastness of space around him, as the details slowly disintegrated into a white mist.
Suddenly, his father was standing before him.
“Dad?”
“Son, you have to go now,” he said.
Edward was a young man, maybe the age he’d been when Rick was born. He looked healthy. No lines on his face, his voice strong and clear, slightly taller than Rick remembered. His eyes were bright and he had a calm, knowing expression on his face.
“Dad, no, please, not yet. Give me more time.”
“It is not up to me, son,” he replied. He gave him a soft smile. “But it is time for you to go back.”
Rick was starting to panic. The thought of letting this moment go, letting his father go, their deep bond, everything he’d gained, was too excruciating to bear. This feeling, this connection, this experience, was everything he had always wanted. Something he’d longed for his whole life. It was as though everything that had gone wrong before, had been made right. All the puzzle pieces now fit.
Rick shook his head, tears welling up in his eyes. “But I can’t let you go. What if I never see you again?”
“Of course you will see me again, son,” he said. “This time together is always going to be within you.” He gently touched Rick’s chest and then his temple. “In your heart and in your mind.”
“But what if it fades, what if I lose it forever?” Rick was bargaining as though his life depended on it.
“You won’t lose it, because it lives within you now. I live within you. We are all an inextricable part of one another. We never really leave, we never really die, we simply change form, from one form of existence to another. But they are all the same. They are one.”
Rick’s heart was still breaking. He wanted to believe, but he was too afraid to let go. “But I want to stay. I am happy here.”
“You can take it with you. That power is always yours. You only have to choose to do so.”
Rick thought about what a comforting notion that was.
His father opened his arms, marveling at the endless shelves and tomes. “This place is a library of us. A repository not only of stories and of information, but of our experiences and perceptions, our souls. Like any library,” he continued, his eyes sparkling with knowledge and wisdom, “you come and read the books. But the books don’t disappear once you stop reading them and put them back on the shelf. They remain. Until the day when someone... when you come to read them again.”
Rick went to embrace his father, but as he did, he felt his father’s form fading to his touch. He heard his dad’s words in his ear, now only a faint whisper, “Live. Love life. I will see you again, my son. Have faith.”
Then the pull got stronger, the voices louder, his vision dimmed, and all faded to white...
CHAPTER 19
Rick awoke with a start. He gasped. His chest burned from an intense pressure. He felt like he had a massive weight on him. He touched his chest, but there was no wound there.
Sofia and Luis, who’d been leaning over him, jumped, startled at his sudden movement.
“What the hell?” Oz shouted.
Alpha-3 and Alpha-4 kept their guns trained on the group. They waited for orders as the situation rapidly unfolded before them.
“Dios mío!” Diego exclaimed, kneeling down next to Rick. “You are alive!”
The others watched in total shock that he was still breathing.
Javier kept his cool. He knew they needed to act fast and be smart about it. He bent down to whisper in Rick’s ear as he pretended to tend to him. “You won’t be for long, if you don’t follow my lead.”
Rick was groggy and confused. He heard the words, but he had no idea what had just happened. He looked at Javier. His vision was hazy. He couldn’t make out his features right away. He was trying to understand what he was telling him.
“Do you know who I am?” Javier asked.
He managed a nod. Then, his eyes started to close again.
“Good. Stay awake!” Javier whispered; his tone urgent.
Rick felt him touch his shoulder and try to gently shake him, but it seemed like everything was moving in slow motion.
“What happened just now?” Javier asked. “You must tell me.”
Rick frowned. He swallowed hard. His voice was hoarse, “I think... I mean... I saw my father. He
