“How horrible,” she said. “I really am sorry.”
Boone nodded. “Thanks.” He held her gaze, then asked, “Why are you here, Em?”
She took a deep breath, then admitted, “Because what I said to you earlier was insensitive and rude.”
“You mean accusing me of having ulterior motives for being friends with your grandmother?”
She regarded him earnestly. “I know better, Boone. I really do.”
“Then why did you say it?”
“I’ve been thinking about that. I think it’s partly because seeing how you are with her, how you are with B.J. and everyone for that matter, reminds me of how much I lost when I let you go. All these years it’s suited me to paint you as another type of man, someone unworthy, a man with no sense of loyalty. I guess I needed that to justify what I did. In a way, you marrying Jenny made it easier. It was proof you’d never loved me at all.”
“Did I have to be a bad guy all those years ago in order for you to claim what you wanted for yourself?”
“I thought it might make it easier to leave,” she conceded, then shrugged. “It didn’t.”
Boone faced her, his frustration evident. “I knew you had dreams, Emily. How often did we sit on the beach at night talking about all you wanted to accomplish? Did you think I didn’t hear you? I might have wanted like crazy to hold on to you, but I never expected to do it.” He held her gaze, his expression sad. “I just hoped you’d come back eventually, that what we had would be important enough to bring you back.”
“I don’t think I could handle the pressure of knowing you were waiting for me, so, yes, I probably did make my leaving sound final,” she told him. “And I needed to make you the bad guy, because I didn’t like myself for hurting you. Grandmother was already completely out of patience with me for mistreating you. Samantha and Gabi thought I was crazy for walking out on what we had.” She shrugged. “I couldn’t let myself even consider the possibility they could be right. I needed a clean break, even if it turned out to be uglier than it should have been.”
“Is that what today was about, too? You got scared that some of those old feelings are still there between us, so you needed to put me in my place, put that distance between us again?” he asked.
“No, today I was frustrated with Grandmother,” she admitted. “I just needed to lash out at someone, and I couldn’t yell at her. You were right smack in the path of my foul mood.”
Boone shook his head. “Not buying that. On some level, you had to believe the words that came out of your mouth.”
“I swear to you that I know better,” she said. “That’s not the kind of man you are. In a way, that’s the trouble. The kind of man you are is too blasted appealing.”
His lips curved at that. “Irresistible, perhaps?”
“Don’t be smug.”
He just laughed at that.
Emily picked up a mug that said World’s Best Mom, smiled at it, then tried to imagine how much Boone’s heart must ache when he saw it. And yet he kept it out, kept his son’s memories alive. That was the kind of man with whom she’d been so careless. She’d tried to tell herself he was reckless and irresponsible, but he wasn’t then and he certainly wasn’t now. He was an incredible father, a good friend, a decent man.
“Grandmother’s furious with me,” she confessed, giving him a wry look. “Not that it’s the first time or anything, but now that I’m all grown up, it actually feels rotten to have her look at me as if I kicked her cat or something.”
Boone had the audacity to grin at that. “I’m the cat, then?”
She chuckled. “Something like that. You should have heard her going on and on about what a paragon you are. I don’t think she’s ever spoken that highly of me.”
“Of course she has,” Boone corrected. “That woman thinks you three girls practically walk on water. She has an album with pictures and news clippings right at the cash register. If anyone asks how you all are doing, she whips it out and makes them look at every page. It’s one of the first things she asked about when I called her to fill her in on the storm damage. She needed to know it hadn’t been ruined. That album means the world to her.”
On one level, Emily had trouble believing that. For whatever reason, she’d never thought of Cora Jane as especially sentimental. On another level, it was obvious that she was deeply sentimental. That was one reason she was fighting so hard against the changes Emily wanted to make at Castle’s.
“Seriously?” she asked Boone, wanting to believe that her grandmother was proud of her in ways her father had never been.
“Cross my heart.”
“And the customers keep coming back?” Emily asked incredulously, not sure if she really believed that her grandmother would boast so openly about her granddaughters, especially when they exasperated her so regularly. There’d been nothing sentimental or affectionate in the lecture she’d delivered earlier. She’d been disappointed in Emily and had let her know it.
“Of course they come back,” Boone said. “That sense of being part of the family is what makes Castle’s by the Sea special. It’s something you can’t re-create with paint and fabric and pretty pictures on the walls.”
Emily sighed, reluctant to accept the truth of what he was telling her. It would make her plans for sprucing up the restaurant impossible. Unfortunately, it was hard to deny what was in front of her face.
“I’m starting to get that,” she conceded.
“Will you stick
