“Nah, that’s Drew and Luke. I’m too quiet. For most, anyway.”
“Not for me.” I gave him a shy smile.
“How come you never said anything?”
“About you?”
“Yeah. Luke told me after Beth told him and swore him to secrecy. How was I supposed to know if you didn’t tell me?”
“I could never have told you because I didn’t think there was a chance you’d like me. I didn’t want to be humiliated.”
“Well, I do like you. Actually, I love you.”
I blinked, then stared at him.
“So much that it makes me feel a little sick,” he said. “I want to go on the Ferris wheel with you and I want to kiss you when we’re up there.”
Kiss me? The angels sang again.
Luke arrived with a tray filled with food, saving me from having to answer. My stomach had a thousand hummingbirds flying around in there. I’d never be able to eat anything.
Beth returned from the bathroom. Her lips were bare of her pink gloss. Why hadn’t she reapplied? She always put it on after she went to the restroom.
“Carlie, can I talk to you for a minute?” Beth asked me.
“Sure.” I got up from the table, stealing a quick glance at Cole, who smiled back at me.
I followed Beth to just outside the covered area. Her fair skin seemed a little green. She must really be sick.
“I’m going home,” Beth said. “I just threw up in the bathroom. Will you tell Luke for me? I don’t want him to smell my breath.”
“Yeah, if that’s what you want.”
“He’ll understand. He always understands everything. That’s the thing, Carlie, he’s so good.”
The thing? What did that mean? “Do you not like him anymore?”
“What’s not to like?” Beth asked. “He’s perfect.”
“So are you.”
“I’m not. Not anymore.” She pulled me into a hug and held me so tightly I could barely breathe. “I love you. No matter what, don’t forget that.”
I separated from her, then studied her expression. Something was off for sure. “What’s going on? You’re acting weird.”
“Nothing. I’m fine.” She wrinkled her nose. “Have you ever noticed how many smells there are at the fair? Foul smells?”
“I think it smells good,” I said. “Like summer.”
“Have fun, okay?”
“Cole told me he likes me,” I said, unable to contain my excitement.
“I knew it. Luke thought he did.”
“He said he wants to kiss me. What if I do it wrong?”
“You won’t. You’ll know it’s right if your whole body feels like a magical unicorn sprinkled fairy dust on you.”
“Is that how it feels with Luke?”
Her gaze flickered upward, then back to me. “Let’s just say I’ve felt that feeling or I wouldn’t be able to tell you what it is.”
“Drive home safe.”
“I will. I’ll see you in the morning. I don’t have to work so we can go swimming if you want.”
I nodded, then watched as she walked away until she disappeared in a sea of people. As I turned back to join the boys, the sun slipped behind Logan Mountain.
When it was our turn at the Ferris wheel, Cole stepped aside to let me go in first, then slid next to me. The attendant pulled the bar into place, and the carriage swayed back and forth. We sat close enough I could feel the heat from his skin.
Cole and I were quiet as they loaded the entire wheel before we were able to get any speed going. Then, around and around we went with REO Speedwagon’s “Keep on Loving You” blaring through the speakers. On the third time around, we lurched to a stop. We were at the very top. The valley spread out before us. Streaks of pink colored the sky in the last light of day. We swayed on top of the world.
“Do you want me to kiss you?” Cole asked. “Luke told me you have to ask, otherwise you’re a predator.”
My stomach flopped over. Just stay in your body, I told myself. “It’s nice to be asked.” A gust of wind ruffled our hair and brought the scent of popcorn.
He smiled as he brushed his hair out of his eyes. “Are you scared?”
“I kind of am.”
He took my hand. “We could start by just holding hands. If you aren’t ready.”
“I might be ready.” I’d only imagined it a thousand times. “But if I’m bad at it, you can’t tell anyone.”
“I would never say anything bad about you. There’s not anything wrong with you as far as I can see.”
A warmth started in my stomach and spread to all parts of my body. “I never thought you noticed me at all.”
“You’re all I notice. Since second grade.”
Could this be happening?
“Drew and I used to have fistfights about which of us got to marry you.”
I laughed. “Who won?”
“Me. Obviously. Or he would be here with you.” Cole looked down to where the attendant was bent over the machine that operated the Ferris wheel. “Do you ever dream about what’s after this? Like when we grow up?”
“Sometimes.”
“What do you dream of?” Cole asked.
“I want to write books.”
“What else?”
“Be married to someone I love and have enough money to order takeout whenever we want.”
He laughed. “That sounds pretty good.”
“What about you?”
“I want to live on a piece of my own property and build a house and have a small farm with horses and chickens. And a dog.” He looked up at the sky. “I want to marry you and have a little girl who looks just like you. I’d like to be a good dad. Like your dad.”
Touched, I had to swallow the lump in my throat before speaking. “I’d like that too.”
“You won’t forget me, will you?” Cole asked. “When we go away to college?”
“I could never forget you. After college, we’ll just come back here and find our property and you can look after the animals while I write my book.”
From below came the sound of the technician cursing.
“Are we ever getting off this thing?” I asked.
“I wouldn’t mind.” He paused. “I’ve never kissed anyone either. I might not do
