I oppose the idea circulating my mind. “What if this is some sick hoax? Most people in Seattle are familiar with the case, right? Hypothetically, what’s to say somebody out there who knows about our situation, knows that we’re vulnerable and wants to place unnecessary stress in the mix of everything else?”
“It’s a possibility. God, at this stage there are so many possibilities.”
“Too many. Now we even have to stay tight lipped about the letters.”
“It’s our only choice at this stage. We’re bound by this now.” The lure in our stare that soon shifts to longing has us both look away. He lets out a forced cough, noticeably affected. “Are we not?”
I prolong our avoided gaze.
“Yes, of course we are.” My chest aches at the thought somebody is playing us. Their cruel intentions make me numb. “I need to revise my will, don’t I?”
“No. Last night I told you how it will go down.”
“It’ll go down how they intend for it to go down. We’re not in control. We’re the prey in their game. Their eyes could be on us this very minute. They may know the kid’s school and lurk. They may even have Addilyn!”
“One thing at a time, Valencia. Deep breaths.”
I try. I will not cry. Not again. Not with him here.
Valencia, you are next.
Giulio, you’re not far behind.
But before all, it’s you both.
“Hey, you alright?”
I take advantage of the way Giulio’s hot eyes are already on mine and respond to his concern with a brief nod, but he isn’t convinced that I’m okay even when I vocalize it.
We don’t break eye contact…
Not when he stands and smooths out his slacks.
Not when he rounds his desk.
Not when he drops down on one knee in front of me. It brings back memories. He knows. Of course he knows what it does to me, otherwise he wouldn’t urge his gentle hand to my chin and slowly turn it so that I fixate on him.
“I’m not going to let anything happen to our twins or you. I may not be able to promise you many things, but I can promise you this.”
I break at the rapid reminder of everything Giulio wants to push past. “And Addilyn?”
We can’t get through this.
“Valencia, I’d like you to take it easy today.”
My falling concern is not even taken into the equation. It’s completely ignored. My cry for help means nothing. He still doesn’t believe it. He doesn’t believe me or in me. “Please answer me.”
“Addilyn will always have a place in my heart. She will always be a piece of me. A piece of you.” The pad of his thumb brushes my earlobe, down my jaw, and curls at the center of my lips. Those eyes I promised my entire life to scan my features one by one. “As much as we want to, we can’t bring her back. Not after all this time. I can’t promise her fate and I’m sorry that I can’t. I wish I could, but I can promise you Slonne and Oscar’s. I can promise yours.”
And I will promise yours, Giulio.
I barely know who I am within this moment, let alone the wild thoughts running through my mind—but they’re there. They blossom when his eyes fall to where I’m biting my lip. It seems as though Giulio is wedged in a place between reality and fiction. I feel it. Oh, what I would do to crawl into that mind and rearrange the puzzle pieces I identify as my husband. I want him to be on my team. I thought that maybe the letters would provide some refuge to the tension between us. Now, I acknowledge they have only intensified our broken hearts and shattered beliefs.
“Have you eaten lunch?” I ask, changing topics.
Giulio blinks and swallows as he comes to. His response to being caught red-handed lost in thought has me bite the inside of my cheek. It’s hard to look at a man who has changed so much, yet at the same time is the same in your mind.
“Yes, I ate before coming back here. I have an in-house meeting at two. Have you eaten?”
“No.”
“Buy some lunch and take the rest of the day off. You should be resting.”
“I know,” I say flatly. His touch leaves mine, yet close proximity remains. We’re inches apart when he asks me softly in parting. “You scared me back there. Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Yes, I’m okay now. Thank you.”
Back at my desk, I need something to set me free. I know exactly what…a strong ginger tea. Yes. Again.
Voices chattering surround me in the Starbucks waiting area. After purchasing a sandwich, my eyes fall behind the shoulders of a man in a power suit flipping through The Seattle Times. An article’s title catches my attention, forcing a gasp to slither down my throat.
The man glances over with a screwed up face. “Can I help you with something?”
“Oh my god!”
“Lady, I said is there something I can help you with?”
He probably assumes I’m a weirdo. Maybe I am…shut up. “May I kindly see that paper?”
He stares for a long moment, shrugs, and hands it to me. “I guess so. It’s always the same things in here anyway.”
I grab my ginger tea just as it’s called and bolt. The man calls out behind me, telling me I can’t steal the newspaper but I can’t control my mind. My heels are daggers against the pavement and my blood pumps nothing but heartache.
Once inside Notti Design, I opt against the crowded elevator and take the stairs two at a time. Adrenaline crawls so deep Lee must notice because he doesn’t even attempt to stop me. My mind fills with compulsive voices I’ve heard over and over for the past months. The ones that led to my separation.
It can all change now.
This is the clue I’ve been waiting for!
I press my elbow down to open the boardroom
