'Jasmine told me you would refuse my offer,' Armaan had said to me. 'That's why I didn't call you about it before. She also knew exactly what your reasons would be. I never realised the two of you had bonded so deeply.'
I'd been so confused. Jasmine knew about the contract? Was that why she had left and decided not to continue with our friendship? But then Armaan said she was aware that I didn't pursue the involvement just for money and that I had returned his 1.5 million before the year was up.
He didn't know where she had gone, just that she had told him she needed to be alone for now and to not spy on her. But I hadn't stopped calling her and finally, after about five days, she had responded with a text message.
-Seriously, Jasper? When am I going to be free of you?'
I had smiled and texted back.
- Never. We're both going to hell for our sins anyway so might as well keep each other company.
She had sent me a face palm emoji.
-How's Skye?
- Still hasn't forgiven me, which is fine. It's not like I feel all that ready to forgive her either for what she did. But good news is that we don't hate each other.
Jasmine had taken a while to text back after that.
- What about Cole?
- Skye's fine with me and him getting together. But I'm kind of scared, I had admitted.
- Why? Is it the dick issue? You know Viagra is an actual thing, right?
I'd sent her a middle finger emoji as a response and ended the conversation.
The truth was, being with Cole scared me because I was still lying to him and I hated doing that. I wanted this new life I had begun to be free of deception and secrets. A fresh start for all of us where we could learn to be happy as a family. Cole should know the truth but seeing him with Jacob broke my heart.
I couldn't bear to tell him. Neither could Skye. Even when Jacob called him 'Daddy' all the time and slept on his chest while I was just Jasper, the guy he liked to play with who watched from the sidelines during all the important moments. I never felt jealous or resentful of Cole. It had always been beautiful seeing them together and always would be. All I knew for sure was that I didn’t want anyone to get hurt because of me again.
I smoothed a hand over Jacob's brow, feeling the silky strands of his blond hair between my fingers and then bent to give him a kiss.
"Sleep well, Jacob," I murmured with a smile, grateful that I could be in his life somehow even if I was in second place when it came to having any rights over him. "I love you so much."
I let out a sigh as I straightened. I wondered just how long we could keep hiding Jacob's paternity when I had promised myself not to start over with lies. The guilt was going to kill me this time around. I had seen how much damage my betrayal had caused, how much I had hurt them and I wished there was a way for Cole to learn the truth without his heart getting broken in the process.
Brushing the tears from my eyes, I stood up to leave the room but then stopped short when I saw Cole standing there in the doorway, giving me a confused look.
My mouth went dry and my heartbeats became hard and fast as I followed his gaze when it went to Jacob's sleeping form before coming back to meet mine. We just stood there for a long minute unable to speak at all. Then Cole gave me a bitter smile, his green eyes hardening in a way I had never seen before.
****
Chapter Thirty-One
Jasper
"Cole?"
He had walked away and was now sitting at the kitchen counter downstairs reading a book, one hand in his hair as his elbow rested on the table. He didn't look up at me. Didn't answer. I felt like shit. Why...why hadn't I been more careful when I had gone upstairs? He'd probably seen me with Jacob, heard me telling him I loved him.
I had sent a text message to Skye straight away, asking her to come home but it was going to take her at least half an hour.
"Cole," I said again and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Say something. Please."
He cleared his throat and turned a page, as though he wanted to lose himself in the story instead of having this conversation with me. That was my Cole. Cole Aimeric If-I-Ignore-It-It-Will-Go-Away Sawyer. I stood there for a moment, not knowing whether to leave him alone like I used to when he got like this or to urge him to open up.
"I think...a part of me has always kind of known," he whispered to me without removing his gaze from the book. "But I shoved that thought down every single time because I believed in Skye so much."
I clenched my jaw at his words, just pressing my fingers into his shoulder. I felt the tension in his body, how much effort it was taking him to control his emotions.
"We should wait for Skye and then talk about this," I suggested gently when I realised he was not planning to avoid the issue.
He straightened and then turned around to look at me directly. "After what you did to me, the way you betrayed me, I refused to believe that she
