Short Plays

Boys Tumultuously rushing at Blanco. That’s it. Guilty, guilty. Take him out and hang him. He’s found guilty. Fetch a rope. Up with him. They are about to drag him from the bar. The Sheriff Rising, pistol in hand. Hands off that man. Hands off him, I say, Squinty, or I drop you, and would if you were my own son. Dead silence. I’m Sheriff here; and it’s for me to say when he may lawfully be hanged. They release him. Blanco As the actor says in the play, “a Daniel come to judgment.” Rotten actor he was, too. The Sheriff Elder Daniel is come to judgment all right, my lad. Elder: the floor is yours. The Elder rises. Give your evidence. The truth and the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God. Elder Daniels Sheriff: let me off this. I didn’t ought to swear away this man’s life. He and I are, in a manner of speaking, brothers. The Sheriff It does you credit, Elder: every man here will acknowledge it. But religion is one thing: law is another. In religion we’re all brothers. In law we cut our brother off when he steals horses. The Foreman Besides, you needn’t hang him, you know. There’s plenty of willing hands to take that job off your conscience. So rip ahead, old son. Strapper You’re accountable to me for the horse until you clear yourself, Elder: remember that. Blanco Out with it, you fool. Elder Daniels You might own up, Blanco, as far as my evidence goes. Everybody knows I borrowed one of the Sheriff’s horses from Strapper because my own’s gone lame. Everybody knows you arrived in the town yesterday and put up in my house. Everybody knows that in the morning the horse was gone and you were gone. Blanco In a forensic manner. Sheriff: the Elder, though known to you and to all here as no brother of mine and the rottenest liar in this town, is speaking the truth for the first time in his life as far as what he says about me is concerned. As to the horse, I say nothing; except that it was the rottenest horse you ever tried to sell. The Sheriff How do you know it was a rotten horse if you didn’t steal it? Blanco I don’t know of my own knowledge. I only argue that if the horse had been worth its keep, you wouldn’t have lent it to Strapper, and Strapper wouldn’t have lent it to this eloquent and venerable ram. Suppressed laughter. And now I ask him this. To the Elder. Did we or did we not have a quarrel last evening about a certain article that was left by my mother, and that I considered I had a right to more than you? And did you say one word to me about the horse not belonging to you? Elder Daniels Why should I? We never said a word about the horse at all. How was I to know what it was in your mind to do? Blanco Bear witness all that I had a right to take a horse from him without stealing to make up for what he denied me. I am no thief. But you haven’t proved yet that I took the horse. Strapper Kemp: had I the horse when you took me, or had I not? Strapper No, nor you hadn’t a railway train neither. But Feemy Evans saw you pass on the horse at four o’clock twenty-five miles from the spot where I took you at seven on the road to Pony Harbor. Did you walk twenty-five miles in three hours? That so, Feemy? eh? Feemy That’s so. At four I saw him. To Blanco. That’s done for you. The Sheriff You say you saw him on my horse? Feemy I did. Blanco And I ate it, I suppose, before Strapper fetched up with me. Suddenly and dramatically. Sheriff: I accuse Feemy of immoral relations with Strapper. Feemy Oh you liar! Blanco I accuse the fair Euphemia of immoral relations with every man in this town, including yourself, Sheriff. I say this is a conspiracy to kill me between Feemy and Strapper because I wouldn’t touch Feemy with a pair of tongs. I say you daren’t hang any white man on the word of a woman of bad character. I stand on the honor and virtue of my American manhood. I say that she’s not had the oath, and that you daren’t for the honor of the town give her the oath because her lips would blaspheme the holy Bible if they touched it. I say that’s the law; and if you are a proper United States Sheriff and not a low-down lyncher, you’ll hold up the law and not let it be dragged in the mud by your brother’s kept woman. Great excitement among the women. The men much puzzled. Jessie That’s right. She didn’t ought to be let kiss the Book. Emma How could the like of her tell the truth? Babsy It would be an insult to every respectable woman here to believe her. Feemy It’s easy to be respectable with nobody ever offering you a chance to be anything else. The Women Clamoring all together. Shut up, you hussy. You’re a disgrace. How dare you open your lips to answer your betters? Hold your tongue and learn your place, miss. You painted slut! Whip her out of the town! The Sheriff Silence. Do you hear? Silence. The clamor ceases. Did anyone else see the prisoner with the horse? Feemy Passionately. Ain’t I good enough? Babsy No. You’re dirt: that’s what you are. Feemy And you⁠— The Sheriff Silence. This trial is a man’s job; and if the women forget their sex they can go out or be put out. Strapper and Miss Evans: you can’t have it two ways. You can run straight, or you can run gay, so to speak; but you can’t run both ways together. There is also a strong feeling among the men of