III
A Romance Ended
I
From the large ballroom of Skvoreshniki (the room in which the last interview with Varvara Petrovna and Stepan Trofimovitch had taken place) the fire could be plainly seen. At daybreak, soon after five in the morning, Liza was standing at the farthest window on the right looking intently at the fading glow. She was alone in the room. She was wearing the dress she had worn the day before at the matinée—a very smart light green dress covered with lace, but crushed and put on carelessly and with haste. Suddenly noticing that some of the hooks were undone in front she flushed, hurriedly set it right, snatched up from a chair the red shawl she had flung down when she came in the day before, and put it round her neck. Some locks of her luxuriant hair had come loose and showed below the shawl on her right shoulder. Her face looked weary and careworn, but her eyes glowed under her frowning brows. She went up to the window again and pressed her burning forehead against the cold pane. The door opened and Nikolay Vsyevolodovitch came in.
“I’ve sent a messenger on horseback,” he said. “In ten minutes we shall hear all about it, meantime the servants say that part of the riverside quarter has been burnt down, on the right side of the bridge near the quay. It’s been burning since eleven o’clock; now the fire is going down.”
He did not go near the window, but stood three steps behind her; she did not turn towards him.
“It ought to have been light an hour ago by the calendar, and it’s still almost night,” she said irritably.
“ ‘Calendars always tell lies,’ ” he observed with a polite smile, but, a little ashamed; he made haste to add: “It’s dull to live by the calendar, Liza.”
And he relapsed into silence, vexed at the ineptitude of the second sentence. Liza gave a wry smile.
“You are in such a melancholy mood that you cannot even find words to speak to me. But you need not trouble, there’s a point in what you said. I always live by the calendar. Every step I take is regulated by the calendar. Does that surprise you?”
She turned quickly from the window and sat down in a low chair.
“You sit down, too, please. We haven’t long to be together and I want to say anything I like. … Why shouldn’t you, too, say anything you like?”
Nikolay Vsyevolodovitch sat beside her and softly, almost timidly took her hand.
“What’s the meaning of this tone, Liza? Where has it suddenly sprung from? What do you mean by ‘we haven’t long to be together’? That’s the second mysterious phrase since you waked, half an hour ago.”
“You are beginning to reckon up my mysterious phrases!” she laughed. “Do you remember I told you I was a dead woman when I came in yesterday? That you thought fit to forget. To forget or not to notice.”
“I don’t remember, Liza. Why dead? You must live.”
“And is that all? You’ve quite lost your flow of words. I’ve lived my hour and that’s enough. Do you remember Christopher Ivanovitch?”
“No I don’t,” he answered, frowning.
“Christopher Ivanovitch at Lausanne? He bored you dreadfully. He always used to open the door and say, ‘I’ve come for one minute,’ and then stay the whole day. I don’t want to be like Christopher Ivanovitch and stay the whole day.”
A look of pain came into his face.
“Liza, it grieves me, this unnatural language. This affectation must hurt you, too. What’s it for? What’s the object of it?”
His eyes glowed.
“Liza,” he cried, “I swear I love you now more than yesterday when you came to me!”
“What a strange declaration! Why bring in yesterday and today and these comparisons?”
“You won’t leave me,” he went on, almost with despair; “we will go away together, today, won’t we? Won’t we?”
“Aie, don’t squeeze my hand so painfully! Where could we go together today? To ‘rise again’ somewhere? No, we’ve made experiments enough … and it’s too slow for me; and I am not fit for it; it’s too exalted for me. If we are to go, let it be to Moscow, to pay visits and entertain—that’s my ideal you know; even in Switzerland I didn’t disguise from you what I was like. As we can’t go to Moscow and pay visits since you are married, it’s no use talking of that.”
“Liza! What happened yesterday!”
“What happened is over!”
“That’s impossible! That’s cruel!”
“What if it is cruel? You must bear it if it is cruel.”
“You are avenging yourself on me for yesterday’s caprice,” he muttered with an angry smile. Liza flushed.
“What a mean thought!”
“Why then did you