word put in for me to make it easy for him to take me on again. It actually ended by them having to press me to take on the post; when you reflect what the taproom reminds me of you’ll understand that. Finally I decided to take it on. I’m only here temporarily. Pepi begged us not to put her to the shame of having to leave the taproom at once, and seeing that she has been willing and has done everything to the best of her ability, we have given her a twenty-four hours’ extension.” “That’s all very nicely arranged,” said K., “but once you left the taproom for my sake, and now that we’re soon to be married are you going back to it again?” “There will be no marriage,” said Frieda. “Because I’ve been unfaithful to you?” asked K. Frieda nodded. “Now, look here, Frieda,” said K., “we’ve often talked already about this alleged unfaithfulness of mine, and every time you’ve had to recognise finally that your suspicions were unjust. And since then nothing has changed on my side, all I’ve done has remained as innocent as it was at first and as it must always remain. So something must have changed on your side, through the suggestions of strangers or in some way or other. You do me an injustice in any case, for just listen to how I stand with those two girls. The one, the dark one—I’m almost ashamed to defend myself on particular points like this, but you give me no choice—the dark one, then, is probably just as displeasing to me as to you: I keep my distance with her in every way I can, and she makes it easy, too, no one could be more retiring than she is.” “Yes,” cried Frieda, the words slipped out as if against her will, K. was delighted to see her attention diverted, she was not saying what she had intended—“Yes, you may look upon her as retiring, you tell me that the most shameless creature of them all is retiring, and incredible as it is, you mean it honestly, you’re not shamming, I know. The Bridge Inn landlady once said of you: ‘I can’t abide him, but I can’t let him alone either, one simply can’t control oneself when one sees a child that can hardly walk trying to go too far for it, one simply has to interfere.’ ” “Pay attention to her advice for this once,” said K. smiling, “but that girl—whether she’s retiring or shameless doesn’t matter—I don’t want to hear any more about her.” “But why do you call her retiring?” asked Frieda obdurately—K. considered this interest of hers a favourable sign, “have you found her so, or are you simply casting a reflection on somebody else?” “Neither the one nor the other,” said K., “I call her that out of gratitude, because she makes it easy for me to ignore her, and because if she said even a word or two to me I couldn’t bring myself to go back again, which would be a great loss to me, for I must go there for the sake of both our futures, as you know. And it’s simply for that reason that I have to talk with the other girl, whom I respect, I must admit, for her capability, prudence and unselfishness, but whom nobody could say was seductive.” “The servants are of a different opinion,” said Frieda. “On that as on lots of other subjects,” said K. “Are you going to deduce my unfaithfulness from the tastes of the servants?” Frieda remained silent and suffered K. to take the tray from her, set it on the floor, put his arm through hers, and walk her slowly up and down in the corner of the passage. “You don’t know what fidelity is,” she said, his nearness putting her a little in the defensive, “what your relations with the girl may be isn’t the most important point; the fact that you go to that house at all and come back with the smell of their kitchen on your clothes is itself an unendurable humiliation for me. And then you rush out of the school without saying a word. And stay with them, too, the half of the night. And when you’re asked for, you let those girls deny that you’re there, deny it passionately, especially the wonderfully retiring one. And creep out of the house by a secret way, perhaps actually to save the good name of the girls, the good name of those girls! No, don’t let us talk about it any more.” “Yes, don’t let us talk of this,” said K., “but of something else, Frieda. Besides, there’s nothing more to be said about it. You know why I have to go there. It isn’t easy for me, but I overcome my feelings. You shouldn’t make it any harder for me than it is. Tonight I only thought of dropping in there for a minute to see whether Barnabas had come at last, for he had an important message which he should have brought long before. He hadn’t come, but he was bound to come very soon, so I was assured, and it seemed very probable too. I didn’t want to let him come after me, for you to be insulted by his presence. The hours passed and unfortunately he didn’t come. But another came all right, a man whom I hate. I had no intention of letting myself be spied on by him, so I left through the neighbour’s garden, but I didn’t want to hide from him either, and I went up to him frankly when I reached the street, with a very good and supple hazel switch, I admit. That is all, so there’s nothing more to be said about it; but there’s plenty to say about something else. What about the assistants, the very
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