“Your reverence,” I answered, “so say all of their own religion: yet which am I to believe? Think ye ’tis so light a matter for me to entrust my soul’s salvation to any one party that doth revile the other two and accuse them of false doctrine? I pray you to consider, with impartial eyes, what Conrad Vetter and Johannes Nas have written against Luther, and also Luther against the Pope, but most of all what Spangenberg hath written against Francis of Assisi, which for hundreds of years hath been held for a holy and Godlike man, and all this in print. To which party shall I betake myself when each says of the other that ’tis unclean, unclean? Doth your reverence think I am wrong if I stay awhile till I have got me more understanding and know black from white? Would any man counsel me to plunge in like a fly into hot soup? Nay, nay, your reverence cannot upon his conscience do that! Without question one religion must be right and the other two wrong: and if I should betake myself to one without ripe reflection I might choose the wrong as easily as the right, and so repent of my choice for all eternity. I will sooner keep off the roads altogether than take the wrong one: besides, there be yet other religions besides these here in Europe, as those of the Armenians, the Abyssinians, the Greeks, the Georgians, and so forth, and whichsoever I do choose, then must I with my fellow believers deny all the rest. But if your reverence will but play the part of Ananias for me and open mine eyes, I will with thankfulness follow him and take up that religion to which he belongs.”
Thereupon, “Your honour,” says he, “is in a great error: but I pray God to enlighten him and help him forth of the slough; to which end I will hereafter so prove to him the truth of our Confession that the gates of hell shall not prevail against it.” I answered I would await such with great anxiety: yet in my heart I thought, “If thou trouble me no more anent my lecheries, I will be content with thy belief.”
And so can the reader judge what a godless, wicked rogue I then was: for I did but give the good pastor fruitless trouble, that he might leave me undisturbed in my vicious life, and thinks I, “Before thou art ready with thy proofs I shall belike be where the pepper28 grows.”
XXI
How Simplicissimus All Unawares Was Made a Married Man
Now over against my lodging there dwelt a lieutenant-colonel on half-pay, and the same had a very fair daughter of noble carriage, whose acquaintance I had long desired to make. And though at the first she seemed not such an one as I could love and no other and cleave to her forever, yet I took many a walk for her sake, and wasted many a loving look; who yet was so carefully guarded against me that never once could I come to speak with her as I would have wished, neither might boldly accost her: for I had no acquaintance with her parents, and indeed they seemed far too high placed for a lad of such low descent as I deemed myself to be. At the most I could approach her in the going in and out of church, and then would I take opportunity to draw near and with great passion would heave out a couple of sighs, wherein I was a master, though all from a feigned heart. All which she, on the other hand, received so coldly that I must well believe she was not to be fooled like any small burgher’s daughter: and the more I thought how hard ’twould be for me to compass her love, the hotter grew my desire for her.
But the lucky star which first brought me to her was even that one which the scholars wear at a certain season, in everlasting remembrance of how the three wise men were by such a star led to Bethlehem, and I took it for a good omen that such a star led me to her dwelling also. For her father sending for me, “Monsieur,” says he, “that position of neutrality which you do hold between citizens and soldiers is the cause why I have invited you hither: for I have need of an impartial witness in a matter which I have to settle between two parties.” With that I thought he had some wondrous great undertaking in hand, for papers and pens lay on the table: so I tendered him my services for all honourable ends, adding thereto that I should hold it for a great honour indeed if I were fortunate enough to do him service to his liking. Yet was the business nothing more than this (as is the usage in many places), to set up a kingdom, being as ’twas the Eve of the Three Kings: and my part was to see that all was well and truly performed and the offices distributed by lot without respect of persons. And for this weighty concern (at which his secretary also was present) my colonel must have wine and confectionery served, for he was a doughty drinker and ’twas already past the time for supper. So then
