The commandant was fit to burst with laughter at my comical story, and because I saw him in merry mood I made yet more free, giving as my excuse that I could not well be reasonable at such a time, seeing that bridegrooms for full four weeks before and after their wedding were never in their sober senses: but whereas they could play the fool without attracting note and in their four weeks by degrees return to their senses, I had had the whole business of matrimony thrust upon me in a wink, and so must play my tricks all at once, so as thereafter to enact the sober married man more reasonably. Then he demanded me what of the dowry, and how much of the rhino my father-in-law had given for the wedding-feast—for of that, said he, the old curmudgeon had plenty. So I answered him that our marriage settlement consisted but in one clause—viz., that his daughter and I should never come in his sight again. But forasmuch as there was neither notary nor witness present I hoped the clause might be revoked, and that the more so because all marriages should tend to the furthering of good fellowship. So with such merry quips, which no one at such a time would have looked for from me, I obtained that the commandant and my father-in-law, whom he undertook to persuade, would appear at my wedding-supper. He sent likewise a cask of wine and a buck to my kitchen: and I made preparation as if I were to entertain princes, and indeed brought together a noble company, which did not only make merry with one another, but in the face of all men did so reconcile my father and mother-in-law with me that they gave me more blessing that night than cursing the night before. And so ’twas noised all over the town that our wedding had been of intent so arranged, lest any ill-natured folk should play some jest upon us. And me this speedy settlement of things suited full well. For had I come to be married with my banns called beforehand, as is the usage, ’twas much to be feared there would have been some baggages that would have given a world of trouble by way of hindrance: for I had among the burghers’ daughters a round half-dozen that knew me only too well.
The next day my father-in-law treated my wedding-guests, but not so well as I by far, being miserly. And then I must first say what profession I was minded to follow, and how I would maintain my household: wherein I was first aware that I had now lost my noble freedom and must live henceforth under orders. Yet I carried myself obediently and was beforehand in asking my dear father-in-law, as a prudent gentleman, for his advice, to digest and to follow it: which speech the commandant approved and said, “This being a brisk young soldier, it were great folly that in the present wars he should think to follow any but the soldier’s trade: for ’tis far better to stable one’s horse in another man’s stall than to feed another’s nag in one’s own. And so far as I am concerned, I promise him a company whenever he will.”
For this my father-in-law and I returned thanks, and I refused no more, but showed the commandant the merchant’s receipt, which had my treasure in keeping at Cologne. “And this,” said I, “I must first fetch away before I take service with the Swedes: for should they learn that I served their enemies, they of Cologne would laugh me to scorn and keep my treasure, which is not of such a kind as one can easily find by the roadside.” This they approved, and so ’twas concluded promised and resolved between us three I should within a few days betake myself to Cologne, possess myself of my treasure, and so return to the fortress and there take command of my company. Furthermore a day was named on which a company should be made over to my father-in-law, together with the commission of lieutenant-colonel in the commandant’s regiment. For Count Götz lying in Westphalia with many Imperial troops and his headquarters at Dortmund, my commandant looked to be besieged next spring, and so was seeking to enlist good soldiers. Yet was this care of his in vain: for the said Count Götz was, by reason of the defeat of John de Werth in the Breisgau, forced to leave Westphalia that same spring and take the field against the Duke of Weimar on the Rhine.
XXIII
How Simplicissimus Came to a Certain Town (Which He Nameth for Convenience Cologne) to Fetch His Treasure
Things do happen in different fashions. To one man ill luck cometh by degrees and slowly: another it doth fall upon in a heap. So hardly had I spent a week in the wedded state with my dear wife, when I took leave of her and her friends in
