The Birds

messenger we sent to the mortals has never returned. Herald Oh! blessed Pisthetaerus, very wise, very illustrious, very gracious, thrice happy, very⁠ ⁠… Come, prompt me, somebody, do. Pisthetaerus Get to your story! Herald All peoples are filled with admiration for your wisdom, and they award you this golden crown. Pisthetaerus I accept it. But tell me, why do the people admire me? Herald Oh you, who have founded so illustrious a city in the air, you know not in what esteem men hold you and how many there are who burn with desire to dwell in it. Before your city was built, all men had a mania for Sparta; long hair and fasting were held in honour, men went dirty like Socrates and carried staves. Now all is changed. Firstly, as soon as ’tis dawn, they all spring out of bed together to go and seek their food, the same as you do; then they fly off towards the notices and finally devour the decrees. The bird-madness is so clear, that many actually bear the names of birds. There is a halting victualler, who styles himself the partridge; Menippus calls himself the swallow; Opuntius the one-eyed crow; Philocles the lark; Theogenes the fox-goose; Lycurgus the ibis; Chaerephon the bat; Syracosius the magpie; Midias the quail;149 indeed he looks like a quail that has been hit hard over the head. Out of love for the birds they repeat all the songs which concern the swallow, the teal, the goose or the pigeon; in each verse you see wings, or at all events a few feathers. This is what is happening down there. Finally, there are more than ten thousand folk who are coming here from earth to ask you for feathers and hooked claws; so, mind you supply yourself with wings for the immigrants. Pisthetaerus Ah! by Zeus, ’tis not the time for idling. Go as quick as possible and fill every hamper, every basket you can find with wings. Manes150 will bring them to me outside the walls, where I will welcome those who present themselves. Chorus This town will soon be inhabited by a crowd of men. Pisthetaerus If fortune favours us. Chorus Folk are more and more delighted with it. Pisthetaerus Come, hurry up and bring them along. Chorus Will not man find here everything that can please him⁠—wisdom, love, the divine Graces, the sweet face of gentle peace? Pisthetaerus Oh! you lazy servant! won’t you hurry yourself? Chorus Let a basket of wings be brought speedily. Come, beat him as I do, and put some life into him; he is as lazy as an ass. Pisthetaerus Aye, Manes is a great craven. Chorus Begin by putting this heap of wings in order; divide them in three parts according to the birds from whom they came; the singing, the prophetic151 and the aquatic birds; then you must take care to distribute them to the men according to their character. Pisthetaerus To Manes. Oh! by the kestrels! I can keep my hands off you no longer; you are too slow and lazy altogether. A parricide152 Oh! might I but become an eagle, who soars in the skies! Oh! might I fly above the azure waves of the barren sea!153 Pisthetaerus Ha! ’twould seem the news was true; I hear someone coming who talks of wings. Parricide Nothing is more charming than to fly; I burn with desire to live under the same laws as the birds; I am bird-mad and fly towards you, for I want to live with you and to obey your laws. Pisthetaerus Which laws? The birds have many laws. Parricide All of them; but the one that pleases me most is, that among the birds it is considered a fine thing to peck and strangle one’s father. Pisthetaerus Aye, by Zeus! according to us, he who dares to strike his father, while still a chick, is a brave fellow. Parricide And therefore I want to dwell here, for I want to strangle my father and inherit his wealth. Pisthetaerus But we have also an ancient law written in the code of the storks, which runs thus, “When the stork father has reared his young and has taught them to fly, the young must in their turn support the father.” Parricide ’Tis hardly worth while coming all this distance to be compelled to keep my father! Pisthetaerus No, no, young friend, since you have come to us with such willingness, I am going to give you these black wings, as though you were an orphan bird; furthermore, some good advice, that I received myself in infancy. Don’t strike your father, but take these wings in one hand and these spurs in the other; imagine you have a cock’s crest on your head and go and mount guard and fight; live on your pay and respect your father’s life. You’re a gallant fellow! Very well, then! Fly to Thrace and fight.154 Parricide By Bacchus! ’Tis well spoken; I will follow your counsel. Pisthetaerus ’Tis acting wisely, by Zeus. Cinesias155 “On my light pinions I soar off to Olympus; in its capricious flight my Muse flutters along the thousand paths of poetry in turn⁠ ⁠…” Pisthetaerus This is a fellow will need a whole shipload of wings. Cinesias Singing. “… and being fearless and vigorous, it is seeking fresh outlet.” Pisthetaerus Welcome, Cinesias, you lime-wood man!156 Why have you come here a-twisting your game leg in circles? Cinesias “I want to become a bird, a tuneful nightingale.” Pisthetaerus Enough of that sort of ditty. Tell me what you want. Cinesias Give me wings and I will fly into the topmost airs to gather fresh songs in the clouds, in the midst of the vapours and the fleecy snow. Pisthetaerus Gather songs in the clouds? Cinesias ’Tis on them the whole of our latter-day art depends. The most brilliant dithyrambs are those that flap their wings in void space and are clothed in mist and dense obscurity. To appreciate this, just listen. Pisthetaerus Oh! no, no, no! Cinesias By Hermes! but indeed you shall.