Karen felt a physical and emotional desperation wash over her. 'Oh, I want to be!' she blurted out, feeling suddenly panicked and threatened. 'I'd do anything to be everything to you!'
'Then prove it to me, darling! Prove it! You know, before you, I used to get together with a group of women who believe as I do. We would talk, express ourselves, and there were times when our group rapport had been so great, that a physical intimacy emerged and we shared our bodies and our minds without any thought of conventional right or wrong, and all that crap society places absurd values on.'
'You mean an orgy?' she asked, unable to contain her shock.
Pat took her hands from the body and walked away from the girl. She turned her back and fumbled with a pack of cigarettes. She kept her voice flat, with only a hint of pain showing through. 'I might have known. I did know. 'An orgy'! Is that all I've been trying to say means to you? All right. Suppose I forget about it. Suppose I do. I'm capable of giving up almost anything for love! I'd do it, but I wouldn't feel any differently about the pure and simple benefits of a few compatible females enlarging their compatibility by sharing their bodies as well as their minds!'
'Don't be mad at me, please, Pat, darling. I… I'm sorry. That was stupid of me,' Karen said, the lightness of her tone disturbed only by a faint quiver. 'I'll try!' Karen blurted abruptly. 'I'll try to see things as you do! I want to.' When the girl didn't reply, Karen spoke again. 'Just tell me what you want me to do! I'll do it! I'll try!'
'Thank you, darling,' Pat whispered. She kissed the girl on her opened mouth, and began to dress.
Pat laughed. 'Hold it, baby! Wait… until later…'
'Please don't stop. Please…' Karen caught the girl around her waist almost causing her to fall.
'Later?' Karen didn't want to wait. This wonderful feeling of pressing excitement was too great. Too new.
'We're going out. We're invited. You'll love it, I promise. It'll be the best ever. You have so much to learn.'
Lorna had been a little more friendly to Karen from the moment she had gotten over her surprise at seeing the girl with Pat at her door earlier. Now she took another look at the little blonde. Karen looked faintly uncomfortable. Especially whenever she caught Bickki Palmer looking at her. Lorna cleared the coffee table, eager to get to the best part of the evening. The other four women were regulars at these sessions, and the older and most mannish woman, Bickki, wasn't the only one who was eager to initiate the pretty newcomer. Pat was talking avidly about some new experiments in ESP she had read about. Lorna knew that none of the women present cared a damn about ESP, but all were willing to indulge Pat her whims. They thought Pat was a little too far out, but she was an exciting, beautiful woman. Lorna was sure that each woman, from Bickki to Marge Caldwell, the pretty, feminine teen-age member of the group, would give up whatever alliances they might have to be in Karen's place. But right now the women were more than willing to settle for just a few hours out of Pat's life. And the lovely young woman she had brought with her would make it even more fun.
'Finish those domestic little chores, Lorna. I scored tonight. Goodies for everyone!' Ginny Gorez fumbled in her paint-stained artist's smock until she found the thin cigarettes. 'I started a new canvas before I came over, and I've gotta save one of these for later, when I get back to work on it. Colors are such a gas when you're stoned!'
Karen had been nervously waiting for something to happen. Now it was about to happen. Karen had known immediately what those cigarettes were. She reminded herself anxiously that she had once read an article about the harmlessness of marijuana. Once Lorna had returned from the kitchen, the skinny artist, Ginny, had taken one of the cigarettes in her mouth, moistened it with her tongue, lit it, sucked in some smoke and passed it on to Paula. Paula passed it on after taking a series of deep puffs. By that time Ginny had repeated the process with another cigarette.
Fascinated, Karen watched Pat take the cigarette and circle the rim with her mouth, leaving a small space for air to be inhaled with the smoke. Her blue eyes watered slightly as she drew on it. Then she coughed softly and handed the cigarette to Karen. 'Don't worry. It's good. It won't hurt you.'
Karen took it warily. 'I know.' She hesitated only a moment, then the combination of curiosity and fear of antagonizing Pat made her attempt to duplicate the tricky act of smoking the thin cigarette. The first puff went off without any trouble. She managed to retain most of the smoke as the others did. Karen almost giggled in spite of her nervousness when she realized the smoke went up instead of down. It seemed to swim like minute fish through her blood and into her skull. The second puff made her cough miserably. She passed the cigarette on to Lorna, waiting apprehensively for her next turn. By now, several cigarettes were making the rounds. The lights were suddenly very low. Karen began to relax more and more with each puff.
The conversation leveled off, and Karen was mildly surprised to find out that she was feeling somehow intimate and warm toward the women in the room. She gave in to the feeling of pure benevolence towards all of mankind, knowing at that moment less insecurity than she had ever known before.
Pat looked more beautiful than Karen had ever before thought she was. It was very hard to keep from taking Pat in her arms and embracing her in front of everyone.
Karen couldn't remember when the entire mood of the room changed. All she knew was that at one moment everything was lazy and warm, and at the next, naked, thrashing bodies were everywhere, wrapped across the furniture and floor. Somehow none of this shocked or offended Karen as greatly as she'd imagined it would. These were her friends, and it almost seemed right that they should become a unit – in every way. Karen knew with a part of her mind that it was the dope-cigarettes which were responsible for the way she felt, yet it wasn't until she saw Pat melt into an embrace with Lorna that the scene began to affect her personally. Their bodies straining together brought Karen out of her dreamy calm. She got to her feet unsteadily and made her way around the twisting hills of flesh. She found herself in the small bathroom, holding onto the sink.
'Baby? Is something wrong?' Pat was weaving slightly, but a look of concern was on her face.
Karen felt relieved at Pat's expression. 'No. Nothing,' she lied. She had given Pat her word. She couldn't break it now.
Pat put her arms around the shivering girl and forced her lips to hers. Karen didn't know if it was the marijuana or just the sheer relief at having Pat in her arms, but by the time the kiss ended she was weak with wanting the dark-haired girl. She reached for Pat again, and suddenly became aware that Pat had been easing her out of the bathroom and back into the living room while they kissed.
Still not breaking the kiss between them, Pat lowered Karen to the floor until they were one with the ocean of flesh. Hands appearing from nowhere were stripping the clothing from Karen's body. Then lips, hands, and darting tongues were working on her nakedness, infecting pleasure on her unwilling body. A small breast – Ginny's child-like breast – was presented to Karen's moaning lips, the surprisingly large nipple working its way into the girl's mouth. Figures were forming patterns of abandonment all around Karen. Other bodies were pressing in on her flesh, grinding against her sides… It was a mural of female sensuality, an orgy in honor of Sappho, an overwhelming of the senses and a gluttony of lesbian ecstasy.
Karen remembered trying to hold back, feeling a twinge of distaste, and then the hands and lips drove everything out of her mind until she, too, was one with the room and the unfamiliar cool hands and warm lips and hot bodies. Soon she was beyond knowing whose hands and lips were on her, and before much longer, she was beyond caring.
CHAPTER TEN
'Pick up on that chick!'
Karen heard the whispering between the teenaged boys walking toward her. She tried to walk around them but they came to a halt in front of her, blocking her way. Karen experienced an instantaneous flare of pure hatred for the young men. She glared at them furiously.
Stunned by the look of such intense malevolence, both boys immediately resumed walking, letting her pass.
