Are You There, God? It's Me, Margaret

dirty books and naked girls. I held my towel tight around my in case they were trying to sneak a look down my bathing suit.

'Evan! Come in here this instant!' Mrs. Wheeler hollered from the porch.

'I'm coming… I'm coming,' Evan muttered.

After Evan went inside Moose said, 'Don't forget to tell your father. Moose Freed. I'm in the phone book.'

'I won't forget,' I promised.

Moose nibbled a piece of grass. Then the back door slammed and Nancy came out, red-eyed and sniffling.

'Hey, Nancy baby! Can't you take a joke?' Moose asked.

'Shut up, animal!' Nancy yelled. Then she turned to me. 'I'm sorry they had to act like that on your first day here. Come on, I'll walk you home.'

Nancy had my clothes wrapped up in a little bundle. She was still in her wet suit. She pointed out who lived in each house between mine and hers.

'We're going to the beach for Labor Day weekend,' she said. 'So call for me on the first day of school and we'll walk together. I'm absolutely dying to know who our teacher's going to be. Miss Phipps, who we were supposed to have, ran off with some guy to California last June. So we're getting somebody new.'

When we got to my house I told Nancy that if she'd wait a minute I'd give back her bathing suit.

'I don't need it in a hurry. Tell your mother to wash it and you can give it back next week. It's an old one.'

I was sorry she'd told me that. Even if I'd already guessed it. I mean, I wouldn't lend a stranger my best bathing suit either. But I wouldn't come right out and say it.

'Oh, listen, Margaret,' Nancy said. 'On the first day of school wear loafers, but no socks.'

'How come?'

'Otherwise you'll look like a baby.'

'Oh.'

'Besides, I want you to join my secret club and if you're wearing socks the other kids might not want you.'

'What kind of secret club?' I asked.

'I'll tell you about it when school starts.'

'Okay,' I said.

'And remember-no socks!'

'I'll remember.'

We went to a hamburger place for supper. I told my father about Moose Freed. 'Only five bucks a cutting and he trims, too.'

'No, thanks,' my father said. 'I'm looking forward to cutting it myself. That's on of the reasons we moved out here. Gardening is good for the soul.' My mother beamed. They were really driving me crazy with all that good- for-the-soul business. I wondered when they became such nature lovers!

Later, when I was getting ready for bed, I walked into a closet, thinking it was the bathroom. Would I ever get used to living in this house? When I finally made it into bed and turned out the light, I saw shadows on my wall. I tried to shut my eyes and not think about them but I kept checking to see if they were still there. I couldn't fall asleep.

Are you there God? It's me, Margaret. I'm in my new bedroom but I still have the same bed. It's so quiet here at night-nothing like the city. I see shadows on my wall and hear these funny creaking sounds. It's scary God! Even though my father says all houses make noises and the shadows are only trees. I hope he knows what he's talking about! I met a girl today. Her name's Nancy. She expected me to be very grown up. I think she was disappointed. Don't you think it's time for me to start growing God? If you could arrange it I'd be very glad. Thank you.

My parents don't know I actually talk to God. I mean, if I told them they'd think I was some kind of religious fanatic or something. So I keep it very private. I can talk to him without moving my lips if I have to. My mother says God is a nice idea. He belongs to everybody.

3

The next day we went to the hardware store where my father bought a deluxe power lawn mower. That evening, after our first at-home-in-New-Jersey supper (turkey sandwiches from the local delicatessen), my father went out to cut the grass with his new mower. He did fine on the front, but when he got around to the back yard he had to check to see how much grass there was in the bag on the mower. It's a very simple thing to do. The man at the hardware store demonstrated just how to do it. Only you have to turn the mower off before you reach inside and my father forgot that.

I heard him yell, 'Barbara-I've had an accident!' He ran to the house. He grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his hand before I had a chance to see anything. Then he sat down on the floor and turned very pale.

'Oh my God!' my mother said when the blood seeped through the towel. 'Did you cut it off?'

When I heard that I raced outside to look for the limb. I didn't know if they were talking about the whole hand or what, but I had read about how you're supposed to save limbs if they get cut off because sometimes the doctor can sew them back on. I thought it was a good thing they had me around to think of those things. But I couldn't find a hand or any fingers and by the time I came back into the house the police were there. My mother was on the floor too, with my father's head in her lap.

I rode in the police car with them since there was no one at home to stay with me. I had a silent talk with God on the way to the hospital. I said this inside my head so no one would notice.

Are you there God? It's me, Margaret. My father's had an awful accident. Please help him God. He's really very kind and nice. Even though he doesn't know you the way I do, he's a good father. And he needs his hand God. So please, please let him be all right. I'll do anything you say if you help him. Thank you God.

It turned out that my father hadn't cut off anything, but it took eight stitches to sew up his finger. The doctor who sewed him was Dr. Potter. After he was through with my father, he came out to chat. When he saw me he said, 'I have a daughter about your age.'

I love the way people always think they know somebody your age until you tell them how old you really are!

'I'm going on twelve,' I said.

'Gretchen is almost twelve too,' the doctor said.

Well! He was right about my age.

'She'll be in sixth grade at Delano School.'

'So will you, Margaret,' my mother reminded me. As if I needed reminding.

'I'll tell Gretchen to look for you,' Dr. Potter said.

'Fine,' I told him.

As soon as we got home from the hospital my father told my mother to look up Moose Freed in the phone book and arrange for him to cut our lawn once a week.

On Labor Day I got up early. I wanted to fix up my desk in my room before school started. I'd bought a pile of paper, pencils, erasers, reinforcements and paper clips. I'm always real neat until about October. While I was in the middle of this project I heard a noise. It sounded like somebody knocking. I waited to see if my parents would wake up. I tiptoed to their room but the door was still closed and it was quiet so I knew they were asleep.

When I heard the knocking again I went downstairs to investigate. I wasn't scared because I knew I could always scream and my father would rescue me if it turned out to be a burglar or a kidnapper.