She hesitated. His hand was warm against hers. Maybe she needed the touch of another human being more than she had thought. But no, she couldn’t stay. She felt vulnerable right now, and if she stayed…No, she couldn’t.
“You said you wanted to learn more about New Symtaria, and how to protect yourself. We can start now.” When she didn’t say anything, he hurried on, “I’ll go stir crazy alone in this room.”
She knew the feeling. Sometimes she felt as though the four walls inside her house were closing in on her, and if she didn’t get out, she would go bonkers. More times than not, she would find herself back at the zoo. Sheba was a great listener.
“Okay, I’ll stay.”
He scooted over, then patted the bed beside him. She laughed. “I don’t think so Casanova.” She dragged a comfy chair closer to the bed, and sat down, then saw that he held the small machine he called his database. When he looked at her, he was smiling.
“What?” she asked.
“Casanova?”
“What about it?”
“You think I’m the world’s greatest lover. I accept your compliment.” He bowed his head toward her.
“That’s not what I meant! It was only an expression.” Her brow furrowed. “He was also a womanizer.”
Rogar raised the database again. “Yes, I see that now.” He glanced at her. “You think that I would”—he looked again at the screen—“taste the charms of many women, never content with just one?”
She threw up her arms. “I didn’t mean it literally.”
“So you didn’t enjoy when we mated.”
“Yes, I did. Very much.”
He smiled again. She could feel the heat rise up her face. “Could we just get started?” His gaze became more intense as it lingered on her. “Teaching me how to protect myself,” she quickly added.
“If you’re positive that’s what you want to do.”
“I am,” she said, keeping her voice firm in case he thought otherwise.
He sighed. “I’m not sure where to begin.”
“Why not start at the beginning, when you shipped my ancestors off to Earth.” That had come out a little more sarcastic than she’d planned, but she felt as though their own people had dumped them. Much like she’d felt all those years at the orphanage.
He plumped a pillow and leaned back against the head-board. “I wasn’t born yet, Callie, but I stand by what they had to do for survival. I wouldn’t call it shipping them off, either, as much as I would say it was saving their lives, and the lives of others. They voluntarily decided to go.”
“Why?”
“It was a dark time for our people. The planet was dying. The air had grown thick with poisonous gases. I’ve heard that staying outside without protection for any length of time could be lethal. The specialists conducted tests, and knew it was only a matter of time before the planet imploded.
“They took very little with them. There were only so many space crafts. They were lucky that everyone escaped.”
“What happened to the planet?” she asked. “Did it die?”
“They say it did. Once I tried to find it using the old coordinates but there was nothing there, so maybe it did.”
She leaned back in the chair and crossed her legs. “I can’t imagine how that would feel. I mean, it would be hard leaving Earth in search of a new home, and knowing that the old one was dying.”
“Sometimes change is good, though. The leaders found New Symtaria, and once again the air was clean and pure. There are oceans, like you have oceans on your planet. There are valleys, and mountains so high they are capped with deep snow.”
“You know snow?”
“We have changes in climate, just as you.”
“How many of my ancestors did they…volunteered to leave?”
He reached for his database. “We can look. Give me your finger.”
Her gaze narrowed. “What are you going to do?”
“I won’t hurt you. Trust me.”
She wasn’t so sure about trusting him. He was just too sexy. Okay, so maybe she trusted him, but maybe not so much herself.
She stood, walking nearer to the bed, and stuck her thumb out. When he reached for it, she jerked it back. “This won’t hurt will it? I mean, you’re not going to draw my blood or anything, are you? I hate needles.” Yes, she was a coward, and she knew it.
“No, I’m just going to do a thumb analogy of your ancestry.”
“You can do that? I mean, like looking at my family tree?”
“It’s not that difficult.”
He didn’t know how hard she’d tried to find information on her birth mother, but to no avail. But now, he could tell her about some of her family. Did she want to know? They could be mass murderers. Or like Zerod, for all she knew.
“It will be okay, Callie.”
She studied his face for a moment and saw the truth of his words. Maybe she would only discover they were animal keepers or something mundane. Oh, what the hell. She stuck out her hand.
He pressed her thumb down on the screen. “That should do it.” He punched in numbers. “Here it is.”
She leaned closer, as he turned the screen toward her. Staring back at her was an older version of herself. The woman had the same color eyes, even the same smile. Wrinkles lined her face, but it was almost as though she could feel the woman’s warmth reaching out to her. Shock washed over her. She gasped, and took a step back, as tears filled her eyes.
“You didn’t tell me the database would do that. You didn’t warn me. I thought it was going to be a name or something.” She turned and ran out of the room, not stopping until she stood in the kitchen. She took deep breaths as she tried to slow her pounding heart.
Rogar came up from behind, and wrapped his arms around her. “What is it? What did I do? Please, know that I would never hurt you.”
She sniffed, then turned and buried her face against his chest. She immediately felt peace as she leaned against him. “I didn’t expect to see a picture. It was just a shock, I guess. For so long I’ve wanted to feel a connection to someone. Even if that someone was already gone.”
“I’m sorry,” he whispered, brushing his hands over her hair.
“Oh, no, don’t be. You’ve given me a wonderful gift.”
“I just never realized how much it would mean to you, or I would have shown you sooner. Forgive me for not thinking.”
He’d apologized for being a man. She smiled. “It was just the surprise of seeing her picture. We look a lot alike. Who was she?”
“According to the database, she was your grandmother.” He pushed a button and handed the device to her. “Just touch the screen and slide your finger to scroll through what it has to say about her. I’ll be in the bedroom when you’re ready to continue.”
“Thank you.” She was glad he was giving her this time alone to read about her grandmother.
As soon as he left, she went to the sofa and curled up. For a moment, she just stared at her grandmother’s image. The eyes seemed to be smiling back at her. Callie instinctively knew she would have liked her a lot.
With a sigh, she began to scroll down, reading the history of her grandmother. It told about her grandparents, and their parents. How her grandmother had taught others how to connect with their guide. Then her husband had died. That was why she’d volunteered to travel to Earth with her daughter.
Her grandmother had been excited about her journey. It still must have been hard to travel to a new place. Callie admired her grandmother’s courage.
