Constance screamed.
Making a poo deposit probably wasn’t the nicest thing to do, but that’s what birds did. She looked back once. Bull’s eye! Revenge was damned sweet.
The French doors were right in front of her. She swooped down and out. Flying was great! The wind rushed past her as she glided through the air. Maybe this was her guide. It felt good, right.
Hey, guide, are you there?
Silence.
Maybe not, but she could get used to this. She flapped her wings, closed her eyes, and became one with the night.
Splat!
Her eyes flew open.
Splat again!
Ugh, a swarm of bugs zipped past, but she could barely see them. She had bug guts splattered on her face. Oh, yuck!
She aimed in the general direction of the cabin. So much for flying. At least her beak hadn’t been open. She landed on the front porch, then began to meditate about her human side. It didn’t take nearly as long to change back, or to realize how chilly it was outside. The fog that always accompanied the change hadn’t made things any warmer. Shivering, she hurried to the backdoor, found the key under the flowerpot, and flung it open.
Callie went straight to the bathroom and washed her face, nausea welling inside her. This was really, really gross. As soon as she felt clean, she ran to her bedroom and pulled on a pair of sweats. Her body was one big goose bump. Before she finished dressing, she heard the Hummer pull up. She quickly jerked on a pair of thick socks before hurrying to the front door. She opened it as Rogar came up the steps, taking them two at a time.
“You made it home,” he said. The worried creases on his forehead faded. “Why did you shift?” He closed the door behind him as he came inside. “Were you in danger?”
“I didn’t mean to shift. It…just happened.” Oh, God, what if she shifted at work or when her landlady came over for the rent?
“You look ill,” he said, and led her toward the sofa.
“I feel ill. Rogar, I didn’t try to shift.”
“What happened?”
She grimaced when she began to think about it. “Constance showed up. She was being her usual bitchy self and began telling her friends how low class I am. I got angry.”
He relaxed. “Ah, that explains it. When a Symtarian becomes very emotional, they will often shift to an animal form. Their guide, if they’ve connected. With men, it’s usually after very passionate sex.”
Like Rogar did after they made love. She didn’t know why that should please her, but it did. Well, except she had to dive for the nearest door before he finished the change.
She was still a little confused, though. “Why now? This never happened before.”
“Because you’re becoming more in sync with your animal guide. The more you shift, the closer you’ll get to her.”
“I haven’t found her, but I thought I heard her talking to me tonight.”
“That’s good. You only have to trust that she will lead you in the right direction.”
“But what if she’s wrong? Does that ever happen?”
He shrugged. “Sometimes. But they’re better able to observe our actions. They’re not directly connected, so they can see with a better perspective than we can. Sometimes we want to listen with our heart, rather than our heads.”
That made sense. Sort of.
“But wouldn’t that work both ways?”
“I often tell Balam if I think he’s wrong.”
“Does he listen?”
Rogar laughed. A deep resonating sound that sent shivers of pleasure over her. She realized again just how hard it was going to be to let him go.
“I don’t think Balam ever listens to me, but he is a good friend.”
“And you’re not afraid he’ll…uh…hurt one of your friends?”
“He wouldn’t.”
“You’re sure he wouldn’t harm anyone?”
“Yes. Very sure. Would you like to meet him?”
For a brief second, excitement flittered through her. Of course she wanted to meet him. Her dream was to work around the big cats. They were magnificent animals. But to be up close and personal?
“Balam wants to meet you,” he urged.
She narrowed her eyes. “If he eats me, I swear I’m coming back to haunt you.”
“Everything will be fine. Remember, Balam is also a part of me, just as your guide is a part of you.”
She nodded, then took a deep breath as he closed his eyes. Her nerves stretched taut when he began to change. As always, a thick fog rolled in. What the hell was she thinking? She couldn’t stay in the same room as a jaguar. She started to get up.
Callie stilled, tears filling her eyes, because she finally recognized the voice from her childhood. “You’re my guide.” She felt as though she had found an old friend.
The fog cleared. There was a deep, guttural purr beside her. She flinched. Then swallowed hard as she stared into the dark eyes of the black jaguar.
“Hello…uh…Balam.” Her voice squeaked. She only hoped he didn’t think she was a mouse.
When Balam came to his feet on the seat beside her, she shifted away. As though that would make any difference. If he wanted, he could be on her in a heartbeat, mighty jaws clamping down on her head. She closed her eyes, taking a deep breath, and trying to dispel that image from her mind.
The big cat moved closer. Callie stayed perfectly still. Balam smelled her hair, her shoulder. Was he deciding if she would make a good meal? This was not good. Why had she let Rogar talk her into meeting his guide? Why had…
A big tongue licked up the side of her face. Oh, great, he was tasting her.
But then he laid down, his head across her lap, and turned on his back. Before she could wonder what he was going to do next, one humongous paw reached up and caressed her face.
She hadn’t expected that. She looked into the jag’s eyes and saw something there she hadn’t previously seen: kindness, gentleness.
Tentatively, she stroked his fur. He closed his eyes and purred. Then it dawned on her. She was petting a jaguar. Hell, a jaguar was lying in her lap. Sure, he was really heavy, but this was cool.
They probably sat there for hours, with her gently stroking his fur. Sometimes it seemed they were silently communicating. Not only was she getting to know Rogar’s guide, but maybe in an odd sort of way, her own.
She must have dozed as the hour grew late, because the next thing she knew, Balam was moving. She yawned and opened her eyes, then glanced down. But it was no longer Balam, Rogar had returned.
She smiled down at him. “Thank you.”
“I told you he wouldn’t hurt you. He’s too much a part of me to ever harm you. Besides, he said he liked you, and that you give good back rubs.”
“I never thought I’d ever get that close to a jaguar. In the classes I took, they taught on the side of caution.”
“But that’s not the Symtarian way when it comes to animals. We are taught to be one with them.”
“I think Balam was right.”
Still half asleep, she smiled. “Right about what?”
“You do give great back rubs.”
Her hand stilled as his words sank in. She was lightly caressing his back, running her fingers through his hair. Her gaze drifted over him.
And he was quite naked.
