'I'm all right,' I said, pretending I didn't have pain tears streaking down my face. And I was so cold, my teeth had begun to chatter like a hammer against my jaw. 'I could keep riding... all day. Why don't we... go mushroom hunting?'
'Now that's a fine idea and I would agree, but I must admit I'm embarrassed to be out with such a scatterbrain.
It seems, my lady, you forgot yet again to put on shoes this morning. What would your mother say?'
'I just wanted Khasar's opinion... on whether my ankles are... sturdier than yours.'
'And what did he say?'
'I don't think he... liked my ankles so well. He fell on me... and broke one.'
'That wasn't very kind,' he agreed, talking lightly as if to distract me from the pain. 'I think there are better ways to tell a person you don't approve of their ankles than to break them.'
'That's what... I thought, too. His manners always were... la--lacking.'
His arm held me tighter to him. 'You're going to have to marry me now.'
'But... I...'
'You slew Khasar, you healed me, and you have perfect ankles. I really don't think this is a question we need to debate.'
'As always... my lord, you make perfect sense.'
His cheek was next to mine. He pulled me closer, his warmth so wonderful, my skin stung against his touch.
And he kissed my neck, behind my ear. Kissed me once, quietly.
So you see, I agreed. To marry Khan Tegus. As Lady Saren. Ancestors, my thoughts must've been as numb as my feet.
And now here I am in a chamber stacked with furs and silks, with a fire at both ends of the room and three large windows, ice covered in a soft cloth pressed to my swollen jaw, my broken ankle wrapped and resting on pillows. And everyone calling me Lady Saren.
The sticking-needle pain of my warming feet has passed. I should go to the kitchens and tell my lady. Tell her that her khan wants to wed her. And it's time for her to say who she is. And who I'm not.
I'll go tomorrow.
Day 165
Shria visited me this morning, smiling. She said the chiefs voted that although Lady Saren's betrothal to Khan Tegus wasn't sanctioned by her father, he's dead now so that matter is meaningless, and since our (their) betrothal came first, he'll marry me (Lady Saren) and not Lady Vachir.
Shria said, 'It's complicated for a ruling lady of one realm to marry a ruling lord of another--usually that lot is left to younger siblings. And now that Khasar s war isn't an issue, Lady Vachir's advisers seemed relieved that the betrothal ties were released.'
She seemed to be holding something back, so I asked, 'How did Lady Vachir take it?'
Shria frowned, then patted my cheek. 'Don't worry about that. Even if her pride is hurt, Lady Vachir can't cause you any trouble now that the chiefs have decided. You'll have your wedding day.'
She handed me a note from Khan Tegus and left me to read it.
We've been betrothed for five years so it doesn't make sense to wait longer. We'll have the wedding in nine days. Now that the date's set, I won't come see you until our wedding day--because it's bad luck and because you might protest the haste. If you try to put it off, I'll have Batu argue with you, and he's very good at it. Rest your ankle.
There will be dancing.
-- Tegus
So it's real. It's happening. And I'm lost.
I went to look for Saren, hobbling out of my room with the help of two canes, when Tegus came down the hallway. When he saw me, he skipped a step. He looked to see if we were alone, picked me up, hurried around a corner, and kissed me. Kissed me long. My canes clattered to the floor, my arms fit around his neck. I felt as though my whole body only now was thawing. While he was holding me I forgot that I'm not who I say I am, that he doesn't know that I'm just Dashti. How can anyone forget? But I did. And I wish I hadn't remembered again.
When we stopped to breathe, he said, 'I wanted to show you something,' and pulled from his belt a blue shirt I remembered well.
'The one I gave you,' I said.
'I kept it with me until your scent faded from the fabric. I should have known you when you first came to sing for my leg, I should have remembered....'
He pressed his cheek against mine. He breathed in against my neck and sighed deep inside. I closed my eyes. I tried to memorize the warm, brown, cinnamon smell of his skin. In case I never smell it again.
'Will you take your shirt?' he asked. 'Will you wear it for me? Against your skin, so it carries your scent again.'
'Yes, my lord,' I whispered. 'Yes, Tegus.'
'Do you have a lady's maid with you? Would you like me to find you one?'
