I laughed when he nearly swooned from the pungulence. (Yes I made this word up, somehow seems right.) I'll give him credit though, he hung tough and grabbed a beer before he slammed the door shut and scrambled backwards.
'You knew, right?' he asked, sitting down at the table and taking a safe breath.
I nodded as I took another gulp.
'Thanks for the warning.' he said acerbically as he twisted his cap off.
'Any time. I'm going to have to get Travis up soon.'
BT looked at me questioningly as he took his own pull from the beer bottle.
'I'm almost out,' I said, as I shook my bottle 'and I'm not opening that fridge again.'
'You're not a nice man, Mike,' BT said and we both laughed. His face grew more serious. 'Mike, I've got to admit this is the worst I've felt since we locked those doors at Safeway a few months back.'
'I think a lot had to do with losing that base. We had it pretty good for a while. Someone else was protecting us. We got to pretend we were once again living our normal lives. And now….'
'We're back in the thick of the shit,' he finished solemnly.
'Yeah it's definitely much, much better being in the tapered thinner ends of the shit.'
BT looked like he wanted to say something more but in the end he just nodded in agreement and drank another swig.
'Speaking of shit.'
'Here we go,' BT said as he shook his head.
'Why are shits tapered at the end?' I asked him.
'Please tell me this is a joke.'
'So your asshole doesn't slam shut,' I finished smiling.
BT had beer shooting out his nose he was laughing so violently. 'You're a dick,' he said, getting up to get the dishtowel hanging on the oven door handle.
Travis came into the kitchen. 'Everything alright?' he asked, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.
'Well, now that you ask. I sure could use a beer,' I told him, pointing towards the fridge.
'You have no bounds, Mike,' BT said as he wiped his face dry with his sleeve. 'I'll get them Travis. Your dad's setting you up.'
I feigned innocence, it was a pose I had adopted entirely too many times over the years. Its effectiveness had dwindled to less than zero.
'Something going to pop out?' Travis asked, intrigued.
'Something like that. Hold your breath,' BT said as he slid his chair over to get a couple more brewskis.
'Dad?' Travis asked.
I nodded to BT. He grabbed an extra beer. Guy code is pretty funny. We sometimes can get a lot accomplished with very little verbiage. With one word I ascertained that my son was asking permission to drink a previously restricted beverage, and with only a head nod to BT he realized that I had answered my son's question in the affirmative and he was now fulfilling the order. I guess if someone really wants to go back to the beginning of early man, this type of communication was an evolutionary necessity. When men were hunting prey that was more dangerous than them, they had to get across as much meaning as possible without any verbal communication so as not to alert their intended dinner. I didn't have a problem giving my underage son a beer. Societal laws were now a thing of the past. Life expectancy had gone from somewhere around 79 to most likely somewhere in the 20's. I wanted my son to enjoy as much as life still had to offer at this point, and if part of that involved a so-called 'illegal' beer, so be it. Of all the things I was going to lose sleep over, this wasn't going to be one of them. That was, of course, unless Tracy found out about it, and then she'd make sure I would.
We sat there together in blissful silence, enjoying each other's company and the beverages. Travis was halfway through with his beer when he finally spoke. 'Dad, I'm scared.'
I nearly choked on my beer as my heart sank somewhere down deep into the depths of despair. To protect, to shelter, to encourage, to cheer on, these are just some of the things fathers do for their kids. Now, I'm not ignorant of the situation, I knew that what was happening was far beyond my scope to control or to temper. I had been doing everything in my limited power to make everything as right as possible, but was it enough? I stood up and hugged him. I had no empty hollow words to try and assuage him, and he would have known them for what they were anyway.
BT was looking away, absently peeling the label off his beer. 'How long are we staying here Mike?' he asked.
I pulled away from Travis. We both may have tried to mask an errant flow of briny water. 'Tomorrow we'll check the barn and hope we get lucky with some new wheels. He should at the very least have some gas for the hummer.'
'Isn't the hummer diesel though?' Travis asked.
'From the mouths of babe,' I said absently. 'Hadn't even thought of that.'
'Diesel, gas what the hell's the difference?' BT asked.
'We put gas in that thing and we won't get a mile before the engine probably shuts down, although we couldn't get a mile with what's in that tank right now either.'
'We can't stay here!' BT said, alarmed and possibly realizing for the first time that we were in essence trapped. 'Maybe we can walk to the nearest town?' he asked hopefully.
'Nothing personal BT, but between your leg, Carol's age, the frigid temperature and a short legged bulldog, we'd be in a lot of trouble. Who knows how far it is to the next anything.'
'Couldn't we just go from house to house?' Travis asked.
'We got pretty lucky with this one.' BT said.
'Yeah, going up to people's houses like this is sort of like playing Russian Roulette. Eventually we're going to come across an occupied place with a trigger happy, cautious owner.' I said, taking another pull from my beer. I had just begun to dwell on how truly screwed we were. Out of the frying pan and into the fire, from the fire into the coals, out of the coals and into some ill placed lava, from the lava and into hell itself. 'Wonderful,' I said, finishing my second beer. My earlier head fog evaporated under the heat of realization.
If the night wasn't so entirely bathed in black, I would have chanced going to the barn now to see where we stood, equipment, supplies and transportation wise. This way, however, I would get to toss and turn all night guessing on what would
'Anyone want another?' I asked, this time oblivious to the stink that came out of the fridge.
'Are you sure that's such a good idea?' BT asked, indicating I'd already drank two of the frothy beverages.
'I can die just as easily with three as I can with two.' I stood up to see two shocked expressions looking back at me. 'Sorry, just feeling a little bitter there for a sec.' I stooped to unhappily put my beer back. 'I'll be back,' I whispered to it.
'We heard that.' BT said.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE - JOURNAL ENTRY 23 - 
The next morning couldn't come soon enough, considering I stayed up the whole time waiting for it. The sun rose over the pine trees revealing nothing but a white expanse. I went back upstairs and rooted around until I found what I was looking for. 'Thermals! Yes!' I said triumphantly. Technically these are long underwear but since I cannot wear someone else's undergarments, this was my coping mechanism. All of us are flawed. It is our responsibility to find ways around those inherent issues.
'Where are you going, Michael?' Carol asked, as I came down the stairs. Her voice was weak and thready. Stress was not doing any of us any favors but she seemed to be weathering it with more difficulty than the rest of us.
'I'm going to check the barn and see if there is something in there that will help us get out of here,' I responded, patting her on the shoulder as I passed.
'We're not staying here?' she asked, gripping my arm with more strength than I thought she had left in her.
'Wow, forgot you grew up on a farm,' I said rubbing my forearm. I was trying for a little grain of humor. I
