Part of him had been expecting this reaction, though another part of him was hoping she had come to congratulate him on his victory. He couldn't help but feel disappointed.
'He sent me to the bacta tank in our first duel. Now I've done the same to him,' he replied. 'That's vengeance.'
'That's foolish!' she shot back. 'You think Sirak's going to just forget about this? He'll come after you again, Bane. Just like you came after him. That's the way this works. You missed your chance to put a permanent end to this feud, and I want to know why.'
'My blade was raised for the killing blow,' Bane reminded her. 'Lord Kas'im stepped in before I could finish Sirak off. The Masters don't want one of their top students to end up dead.'
'No,' she said, shaking her head. 'Your blade was raised, but Kas'im didn't stop you. You hesitated. Something held you back.'
Bane knew she was right. He had hesitated. He just wasn't sure why. He tried to explain it. to Githany and himself. 'I've already killed one foe in the ring. Qordis chastised me for Fohargh's death. He warned me not to let it happen again. I guess. I guess I was worried about what the Masters would do to me if I killed another apprentice.'
Githany's eyes narrowed in anger. 'I thought we'd finally stopped lying to each other, Bane.'
It wasn't a lie. Not exactly. But it wasn't entirely accurate, either. He shifted uncomfortably, feeling guilty beneath her furious glare.
'You couldn't do it,' she said, reaching out and jabbing him hard in the chest with her finger. 'You felt the dark side swallowing you up, and you pulled back.'
Now it was Bane's turn to get angry. 'You're wrong,' he snapped, swiping her accusing hand away. 'I retreated from the dark side after I killed Fohargh. I know how that felt. This is different.'
His words carried the righteous weight of truth. Last time he'd felt hollow inside, as if something had been taken from him. This time he could still feel the Force flowing through him in all its savage glory, filling him with its heat and power. This time the dark side remained his to command.
Githany wasn't convinced. 'You still aren't willing to give yourself fully to the dark side,' she said. 'Sirak showed weakness, and you showed him mercy. That's not the way of the Sith.'
'What do you know of the ways of the Sith?' he shouted. 'I'm the one who's read the ancient texts, not you! You're stuck learning from Masters who've forgotten their past.'
'Where in the ancient texts does it say to show compassion to a fallen enemy?' she asked, her voice dripping with scorn.
Stung by the words, Bane shoved her sharply backward and turned away. She took a quick step to balance herself, but kept her distance.
'You're just angry because your plan fell apart,' he muttered, suddenly unwilling to face her. He wanted to say more, but he knew the rest of the students would be down soon. He didn't want anyone to see them talking together, so he simply walked away and left her standing there alone.
Githany followed him with cold, calculating eyes. She'd been impressed watching him toy with Sirak in the ring; he'd seemed invincible. But when he'd failed to kill the helpless Zabrak, she was quick to recognize and identify what had happened. It was a flaw in Bane's character, a weakness he refused to recognize. Yet it was there nonetheless.
Once the passion of the moment had faded, once he was no longer driven by the dark side, his seething bloodlust had cooled. He hadn't even been able to kill his most hated enemy without provocation. Which meant he probably wouldn't be able to kill Githany if it ever came down to it.
Knowing this changed the nature of their relationship once again. Recently she'd begun to fear Bane, afraid that if he ever turned on her, she wouldn't be strong enough to stand against him. Now she knew that this would never happen. He simply wasn't capable of killing an ally without justification.
Fortunately, she didn't have the same limitations.
Bane was still thinking about what Githany had said later that night as he lay in bed, unable to sleep. Why hadn't he been able to kill Sirak? Was she right? Had he pulled back out of some misguided sense of compassion? He wanted to believe he had embraced the dark side, but if he had, he would have cut Sirak down without a second thought, no matter what the consequences.
However, it was more than this that was bothering him. He was frustrated by how he'd left things with Githany. He was undeniably drawn to her; she was hypnotic and compelling. Each time she brushed up against him he felt chills down his spine. Even when they were apart he often thought of her, memories lingering like the scent of her intoxicating perfume. At night her long black hair and dangerous eyes haunted his dreams.
And he honestly believed she felt something for him, too… though he doubted she would ever admit it. Yet as close as they'd become during their secret lessons together they'd never consummated their yearning. It just seemed wrong while Sirak was still the top apprentice at the academy. Defeating him had been the underlying goal for each of them; neither one had wanted any distractions from that goal. He was a common foe that united them to a single cause, but in many ways he had also been a wall keeping them apart.
Taking Sirak down should have leveled that wall into rubble. But Bane had seen the disappointment in Githany's face after the battle. He'd promised to kill their enemy, and she'd believed in him. Yet in the end his actions had proved he wasn't up to her expectations, and the wall between them had suddenly grown much, much stronger.
Someone knocked softly at the door of his chamber. It was well after curfew; none of the apprentices had any reason to be in the halls. He could think of only one person who might be wandering the halls at this hour.
Leaping from his bed he crossed the floor in one quick stride and yanked open the door. He quickly masked his disappointment at seeing Lord Kas'im standing beyond the threshold.
The Blademaster stepped through the open door without waiting for an invitation; he gave Bane a nod that told him to close it once he was inside. Bane did as he was bidden, wondering at the purpose of the unannounced late-night visit.
