“I know I’ve asked you before not to come back to Canada,” he said. “That was just me talking, you understand. Just looking out for Natalie. Well, now I have the chance to make it official. The people in Toronto have asked me to formally exclude you from entry into this country, for the foreseeable future.”
“What are you talking about?”
“It means you go home today, and you stay there. Your name is on a list now. If you try to cross the border, anywhere along the border, you’ll be detained. Is that understood?”
“No. It is not understood. Why are you doing this?”
“I told you, this comes from Toronto,” he said. “Although I don’t necessarily disagree with it. We’re going to work with the Michigan State Police and the FBI to solve two murders. One in each country. Your particular talent for getting in the way of things is not going to be helpful.”
“Sergeant Moreland-”
“Good day, Mr. McKnight. Chief Maven. I’m glad you could be here. Have a safe trip home.”
Those were his last words to us. He left the room. He was walking even more slowly now, like he didn’t have much left, like the day had taken just about everything from him.
There was nothing else for us to do except leave. We went out to Maven’s car and started the long journey home.
“That’s why you’re here,” I said. We weren’t even out of Sudbury yet. “To make sure I go right back to Michigan.”
“If you think that’s the only reason,” he said, “then I don’t know what to say to you.”
Three hours later, we hadn’t said another word to each other. I sat with the flag and box in my lap, Natalie’s hat in my hands. I kept turning the hat around and around while I thought about everything Sergeant Moreland had said. Especially about Antoine Laraque.
Three hours to think about that while the trees rushed by, and then the flat, wide open fields as we got closer to the lake. Then the lake itself. We drove through Blind River again. As we got close to the bridge, I finally cleared my throat and said something.
“About what I said back there…”
“Forget it,” Maven said.
“Seriously, I appreciate what you did today. I guess I’m not used to you giving me any kind of break.”
“I said forget it.”
“Okay.”
We crossed the bridge. Maven drove to Paradise. The sun was going down now. Eight hours in the car, a couple of hours in Sudbury. It had been a hell of a day.
“I’ll buy you a drink,” I said as we got close to the Glasgow.
“I’m gonna get home to dinner.”
“Okay, good enough.”
“Moreland was right, by the way.”
“About what?”
“About everything,” he said. “First of all, when he said you were Natalie’s last chance to be happy. I saw the two of you together in that restaurant. She was a happy woman. I hope you’ll remember that.”
I wasn’t sure what to make of that one. How much more could Maven do for me in one day?
“He was also right about you staying the hell away from there,” Maven went on, suddenly sounding a lot more like the man I knew. “So help me God, if I find out you’re sticking your nose in this thing…”
“Somebody took her life away from her,” I said, “and that person is walking around on this earth right now.”
“I’ll make sure they tell me what’s going on,” he said. We had come to the second cabin now. He pulled over and put the car in park. “Every step of the way, until they nail this guy. I’ll call you every goddamned day if you want. Just don’t go and mess this up, McKnight. Do you hear me? Will you listen to me for once in your life? If you do something stupid, then your life will be over, too. Do you think Natalie would have wanted that?”
I didn’t have an answer for that one. I couldn’t tell him the truth, that I didn’t care what happened to me. That I truly, honestly did not care. I could only care about one thing.
“Thank you again, Chief.” I got out of the car.
“McKnight, God damn it.”
“Thank you. I mean it.” I shut the door and walked away. I didn’t hear him leave until I was inside.
I hadn’t eaten anything all day, and there sure as hell wasn’t any food here in the second cabin. I didn’t feel much like being sociable, even with Jackie, but I didn’t have much choice. I went down to the Glasgow, told Jackie about the service, had some of his beef stew. I had a cold Canadian, held the bottle in my hand for a long time, thinking about what Natalie had said. You think Canadian beer is better than American beer…For once you get something right.
I couldn’t stay long. I said good night to Jackie, went back up to the cabin. It was dark now. As I pulled in, I saw Vinnie’s truck parked there. He must have spent at least part of the day fixing his battery cables. Now he was inside waiting for me.
I went through the whole day again. With Vinnie, I went a little deeper into what Moreland had told me. Everything about Laraque, and how the killer probably tracked down Natalie to my cabin. Vinnie listened carefully to everything I said. When I was done, he told me he was taking me somewhere.
“I really don’t feel like going anywhere else today,” I said.
“Everything’s ready,” he said. “You have to come.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Let’s go, Alex. It’s time.”
Anyone else I might have kept arguing. I figured I owed Vinnie the benefit of the doubt. So I let him drive me over to the reservation, past the casino, to his cousin Buck’s house. He parked his truck and took me out behind the house. I had been here once before, and now it looked like I was back for the same reason.
Buck had built a sweat lodge in his back yard, a half circle about ten feet in diameter. He had lashed some saplings together and then covered them with canvas and every old rug he could get his hands on. From the outside, it looked like something in the middle of a garbage dump. But on the inside, it was something pretty amazing.
Buck was there with three other men from the Bay Mills tribe. They all nodded to me solemnly, without a word spoken. Wide faces with dark, careful eyes. Long hair down every back. They had a fire going, and they were heating rocks in the middle of it. As soon as he saw me, one man started to lift the rocks with a long shovel and take them into the sweat lodge.
The other men started to undress. I knew the drill, so I did the same. Soon we were all standing there in our underwear. It was cold enough to start me shivering in three seconds, even though the calendar still claimed it was July.
The men went into the sweat lodge. I followed them. The steam was already overpowering. Buck dipped a great iron ladle into a bucket of water and poured it on the hot rocks. Then he put a few sprigs of sage on the rocks. One of the four medicines. The last time I had been here, the medicine had been for Vinnie. His brother had been murdered. Today the medicine was for me.
I sat there in the dark, and as I did I felt my muscles begin to relax. All the tension in my body, since that one horrible moment, me sitting on the floor, holding on to Natalie. It was slowly leaving me. Buck put more water on the rocks. I was sweating. The steam filled my lungs. It was inside me and all around me and now it felt like I was floating in it.
It was dark. There was a faint glow from the rocks and nothing else. Vinnie had told me once that he saw things in the steam, that that was part of the experience, part of why the Ojibwa treasured this. I had believed him only as far as you can believe something you’ll never see with your own eyes. But on this night, as the steam grew so thick it seemed to be something you could hold in your hand, I looked into it and I saw Natalie. God help me, I saw her standing there right in front of me. She was in her uniform. Her hair was pinned up. She wasn’t wearing her hat. She smiled at me and reached out her hand like she would touch my chest. Then she was gone.
If I was imagining it…If my mind was using the blank slate of the steam to create this picture…I don’t know. I don’t really care. I saw her and she was as real to me as anything else. When I came back out of the sweat
