The Last of the Red-Hot Vampires

'Uh-huh. I'm willing to let you get away with this one because I've never heard of a cloud associated with a faery ring, but I'm not going to go so easy on you next time.' Sarah smiled as she spoke, digging her key out of her camera bag. I rolled my eyes. 'Dibs the bathtub first.'

'You're mean,' I answered, fitting my own key into the lock.

'You're not supposed to get your owies wet.'

'I am not Tyler,' I said with infinite dignity, despite the various bandages swathing my arms, hands, and one eyebrow. 'He is six and an extremely precocious child whom you spoil shamelessly. I am just a friend who is subjected to your abuse under the guise of concern.' I opened the door on the last of my words, flipped on the light, and stared with stunned disbelief at my room.

'Uh…Sarah?'

'Hmm?' She paused in her doorway, looking back at me.

'The kidnapper is here.'

She stared at me for a moment, then hurried after me as I entered my room. 'Oh! The nerve! I'll get the police—'

I snatched up the nearest item at hand to use as a weapon—which turned out to be a paperback Agatha Christie novel—and threw myself in front of Sarah, fully intending to protect my friend despite my injuries, as the deranged kidnapper moved toward her.

The man moved faster than I thought, however. He seemed to blur as he moved, one minute standing next to the chair on the opposite side of the room, the next in front of Sarah, his hand on the door to keep it from opening any further, his head tipped down so he could look her in the eyes.

'There is no need for you to call the authorities,' he said in his deep, slightly Irish voice that contrasted so oddly with his dark skin and exotic eyes.

'There most certainly is!' Sarah protested.

I added my two cents, stalking forward with my book held in a threatening manner. 'I'd say assault and kidnapping is grounds for arrest. The police were very interested in having a word with you. I'm sure they will be delighted to discuss the issue.'

Sarah, to my surprise, did not knee the attacker, or even scream for help. Instead, she stood in front of him, her mouth slightly opened, an odd look of absorption on her face.

'Sarah,' I said loudly, waving my book around.

Neither she nor the man gave me so much as a glance.

I moved next to them, peering first at him, then her. Their eyes were locked, their posture that of two lovers about to kiss.

It bothered me intensely that she would stand and gawk at an (admittedly handsome) insane criminal.

'Sarah? Hello?'

'You have nothing to fear from me,' the man told her gently, and to my complete amazement, she nodded her head and closed the door.

'Oh my god, you're some sort of hypnotist, aren't you?' I told him, watching Sarah. Her eyes had a slightly dazed look to them, her breath coming with soft little panting sounds. She was blushing, as well, her cheeks pink with some strong emotion. 'I insist that you stop this right now. I will not have you victimizing my friend.'

'I…I'm glad,' she said, ignoring me. She licked her lips nervously, her eyelashes fluttering as she sent him coy little glances.

'Sarah, stop it! Snap out of it!' I grabbed her shoulders and forcibly turned her toward me. Her head swiveled so she could continue to gaze at the man. I grabbed her chin and turned her face so she was looking at me. 'Sarah!'

'Hello, Portia. It's all right. We don't have anything to fear from him.' Her eyes were slightly dilated, but other than her strangely flustered state, she seemed to be all right.

Her words, however, made it clear she was far from in her right mind. 'I'm going to take you back to the hospital,' I said slowly, so she would understand. I looked over her shoulder to where the man stood. 'And if you try to stop me, I will scream bloody murder and bring up everyone in the pub.'

'I have saved your life,' the man said, his brows pulling together in a frown.

Sarah smiled at him and nodded, a devoted look on her face. 'He did. He saved us.'

'There was nothing threatening us except you,' I said firmly, trying to steer Sarah toward the door. 'I will call the police from the pub downstairs. And if you try to kidnap us again—'

'Blast it, woman, I am not a kidnapper!' he exploded.

I took a few precautionary steps backward, glared at Sarah's head for a moment as she stood simmering at him, finally yanking her back to stand with me. 'Look, you can yammer on about saving our lives all you want, but I know what I know.'

'You know nothing,' he said, scorn dripping from his voice. He stalked toward me, his black eyes fairly shooting sparks. I looked around quickly for a sturdier weapon than a book, but other than the bedside lamp, my room was horribly weapon-free. 'I did save your life, and by the laws governing the Court of Divine Blood, I demand recompense in the form of exculpation.'

Chapter 4

I felt behind me for the table lamp, grasping it firmly and shifting slightly to the side to hide the fact I was holding it. It wasn't much of a weapon, but it was better than a paperback.

The man stopped in front of me, so close I could smell his woodsy aftershave.

'I want you to leave this room now,' I said in a calm, but firm, voice. Beside me, Sarah made a slight noise of unhappiness. 'I don't know anything about a court, but I do know that you have violated several laws, and the police are even now searching for you. If you leave right now, I will not harm you, but I am fully prepared to defend my friend and myself from you if you insist on attacking.'

An annoyed look flitted across his face. 'Stop saying that! I have not attacked you!'

'You strangled me!' I answered, part of my mind pointing out that reason never worked with deranged madmen, but too irritated to listen. 'I almost died! If that's not an attack, I'd like to know what is!'

'I told you—that was before I knew you were mortal,' he snapped, irritation replacing the annoyance.

I waved the book around in a vaguely threatening manner. 'I'd just like to know what you think I could be if not mortal!'

'You're a virtue,' he answered quickly, reaching behind me and wrenching both lamp and book out of my hands, tossing them onto the bed. 'Thus, you must be a member of the Court of Divine Blood, and as such, bound to uphold the laws therein. You wish for an accounting? I will give you one. The Hashmallim do not enter the mortal world unless it is to capture someone intended for destruction. Since I saved the lives of you and your friend by spiriting you away from under the nose of the Hashmallim, you are in my debt. I am calling in that debt, and the price shall be exculpation.'

'I forgive you,' Sarah said with breathy adoration, her eyes glowing as she gazed at him.

'The first thing I do after this guy is locked up is get you to a good head shrink,' I told her.

'Woman!' the man roared, and grabbed me by the neck, hauling me up until my face was close to his. His eyes burned into mine, his breath skittering along my mouth.

'My name is Portia,' I said without thinking. 'I hate being referred to as if I was nothing but an object!'

'You push me too far, Portia!'

Sarah made faint mewing noises of distress as she pushed in close to us, her hands on his arms.

'You're assaulting me again.' I waved my arms frantically for the lamp or book.

'Eee!' Sarah said, half demanding, half plaintive as she brushed her lips on his cheek.

The man turned his head slightly, and gave her another soul-piercing look. 'You are not for me, sweet.'

'Oh,' she said, pulling away, an oddly content look on her face as she stood watching us.

'Stop hypnotizing—'

The man took a deep breath, closed his eyes for a moment, and twisted his body as I tried to knee him.