other people’s research and dreaming about his dead whore of a mother.
This finally stops Berkmann. At length, as if he has regained his composure, he replies:
BERKMANN› I AM to you as the SUN to a GRAIN OF SAND. As the EAGLE to the WORM. I had your friend Turner like a WOMAN. I swam in Eros like a shark in a tidal pool, feeding on what I chose. I delivered Lenz’s wife to the knife, and it was a MERCY KILLING. I am the WILL TO POWER made FLESH upon the EARTH. I AM AN ARROW TEARING THROUGH THE VEIL OF TIME.
I’ve had enough. The line about Miles rattled me, but not enough to give Berkmann the last word.
HARPER› You spout Nietzsche like a college sophomore. Fitting, since he died eating his own excrement.
BERKMANN› I shall be here when Drewe calls me.
I slam down the ESCAPE key and terminate the conversation. My hands are shaking with rage as I dial Miles’s cellular.
“Harper?”
“Not a single typo. Are you anywhere close to finding his place?”
“Maybe. I’m waiting for a guy now. A homeless guy named Leonardo. He’s a sidewalk artist. Leonardo. You believe that? He’s supposed to know something.”
“Like what?”
“I won’t know till I see him, will I?”
“What about Baxter? He found anything?”
“Nothing.”
“Damn! You’ve got to find him, Miles. He wants Drewe.”
“Drewe?”
“He’s fixated on her, obsessed. Like he thought he was with Erin. He bragged about you too. He
The silence on the other end of the phone is absolute. I know I’ve wounded Miles deeply, but maybe I wanted to. Maybe I want him in a state of fury when he finally faces Berkmann.
“Harper?”
Drewe’s voice sends a shock through my nervous system. I turn to my right and see her standing three feet inside my office-the room she has not entered for seven weeks-wearing nothing but a white terry bathrobe and a damp towel wrapped around her hair.
“What’s happening?” she asks. “Who wants me?”
“I’ve got to go, Miles.”
“Wait! I need you to keep him on-line.”
“I can’t do it. You be careful.” I break the connection with the finger button.
“Harper?” Drewe says again.
I consider lying, then crush the impulse. “Berkmann’s alive, Drewe.”
“How do you know?”
“I just talked to him on EROS.”
“Oh, God.”
“His text isn’t showing any errors, so at least he’s back in New York. Miles is trying to find him right now.”
She folds her arms across her chest as if suddenly cold. “I heard my name through the speakers. I heard him say my name.”
“Don’t patronize me like that. What did he say about me?”
“He’s obsessed with you. He’s nuts. Let’s get out of here.”
“What video were you talking about?”
“Drewe-”
“What video?”
I sigh wearily. “He left a video here after Erin’s murder.”
“Where is it?”
“I sent it to the FBI this morning.”
Her eyes never leave my face. “But you kept a copy. You don’t trust anyone enough not to keep a backup. I know you.”
“I didn’t, Drewe.” No one in the world could fault me for that lie.
“I know you’re trying to protect my feelings,” she says. “But we’re past that. I want to see this man.”
I take her hand and squeeze it hard. “No, you don’t. You don’t want those pictures knocking around in your head for the rest of your life.”
“Did he have sex with Erin’s body like he did with the other victims?”
“No. But he danced her around the room after she was dead. He showed me her ovaries. He pissed into one of my guitars and hung it back on the wall. I took it outside and burned it. You don’t want to see this tape.”
She closes her eyes. “Get it.”
“Drewe-”
“
I go silently to my desk, retrieve the eight-millimeter original, and hand it to her.
“I’ll see you when it’s over,” she says, her face resolute.
“Drewe, please.”
“I know how to work the camera. Please get out. This is something I have to do alone.”
CHAPTER 47
While Drewe watches Berkmann’s video in my office, I pace around the kitchen like a caged ape. When I can stand it no more, I call Miles from the kitchen telephone. He sounds relieved to hear my voice.
“I’m still waiting for Leonardo to show,” he says in a loud whisper. “It better be soon too. It’s getting dangerous up here. I just had to take down a couple of kids.”
“What do you mean?”
“Couple of brothers backed me up against a wall and told me I was the wrong color for the neighborhood. I thought they wanted to rob me-I’ve been handing out cash like Santa Claus up here-but they just wanted to fuck me up. They weren’t interested in how many black friends I have either. I had to kick them a few times.”
“Kick them?” I echo, in the same moment remembering Miles’s martial arts training, the assault charge Lenz told me about.
“Berkmann must be crazy to live up here. Maybe it’s like a warehouse, where he can just drive right into the building.”
“He looked to me like he could take care of himself, Miles.”
“We’ll find out, won’t we? I just hope I find the place soon. It’s nearly dark up here.”
Which means it will be dark here soon.
Miles is talking again, but I no longer hear him. Drewe is standing in the kitchen doorway. The towel is gone from her head. Her hair is a storm of copper tangles, her eyes blank circles shot with blood.
“I’ve got to go, Miles.”
“Again?”
I hang up the phone and pull Drewe into a tight embrace. Her arms hang limp at her sides. Her body seems without breath. The robe is wetter than before, with sweat now rather than shower water. “I’m sorry,” I whisper. “I tried to tell you.”
“I want to talk to him,” she says in a dead voice.
