Twelve Sharp

'Connie hired her,' I said.

We all glared at Connie.

'I gave her three impossible files. I didn't think we'd ever see her again. I thought I was getting rid of her. And anyway, you were the one who suggested giving her the impossibles!' Connie said to me, glaring back. 'I'm not taking the fall for this all by myself.'

Joyce Barnhardt shoved through the front door and stood in the middle of the floor looking like something fresh out of an S amp;M movie. She'd improved on the black leather outfit by adding a black leather utility belt that carried a can of Mace, a stun gun, a Glock, and cuffs. Only the whip was missing.

'These two files you gave me are impossible,' she said, tossing the files onto Connie's desk.

'And?' Connie said.

'There are no leads. Everything hits a wall. These assholes aren't even dead. I want something else.'

'Everything else is assigned,' Connie said.

'Then reassign someone.' Joyce looked at the Lonnie Johnson file open on Connie's desk. 'I want this one. I saw this guy on the wall in the post office. This is worth something. Armed robbery. I could get my teeth into this one.'

'Yeah, but you're supposed to bring them in to get re-booked, not gnaw on them,' Lula said.

'Shut up, fatso.'

Lula was out of her seat, and Connie and I jumped between her and Joyce.

'Take it,' Connie said to Joyce. 'Just get out of here!'

Joyce snatched the file and swished out of the office.

'Never mind finding the make of the car and the license number,' I said to Meri.

'Boy, too bad,' Lula said. 'I was looking forward to going after Lonnie Johnson.'

'Me too,' I said. 'I'm real disappointed.'

Lula's phone rang. She looked at the readout, pumped her fist in the air, did a victory dance, and bustled outside to have some privacy.

'Is she really going out with Tank?' Connie wanted to know.

'Looks that way,' I said.

'How did that happen?'

'I think it was fate.' And Caroline Scarzolli.

'I guess we're left with Charles Chin,' Meri said.

I looked at Chin's file. White-collar crime. He'd embezzled close to $15,000 while working at one of the local banks. He had a house in a nice neighborhood in north Trenton. And he hadn't shown up for his court appearance.

'He answered the phone sounding very drunk,' Meri said.

'When did you call?'

'About an hour ago.'

I grabbed my bag and stuffed the file in it. 'Let's roll.'

Meri looked hopeful. 'Me too?'

'Yes. We shouldn't have a problem with this. We'll let Lula do her shopping.'

I took the Mini and didn't bother to check for a tail. Best not to know, I thought. Meri, on the other hand, kept checking her mirror.

'Don't look,' I told her.

'But what if we're followed?'

I didn't want to explain the whole process to her so I conceded. 'You're right,' I said. 'Let me know if we're followed.'

'I thought we were being followed when we first left the office but then the car disappeared.'

Imagine that.

I turned onto Cherry Street and Meri read off the house numbers.

'It's on the right,' she said. 'The grey house with the white shutters.'

I parked in front of the house and tucked my cuffs into the back of my jeans and slipped a small canister of pepper spray into my jeans pocket.

'Just stand behind me and smile like you're friendly and let me do the talking,' I told Meri.

We walked to the small front porch and rang the bell and waited. No answer. I rang again, and I heard something crash into the door. I stepped away from the door and looked into the front window. There was a man lying on the floor in front of the door.

'Try the door and see if it opens,' I told Meri.

Meri turned the knob and pushed. 'Nope. Locked.'

I walked around to the back of the house and tried the back door. Also locked. I returned to the front and started looking for a key. Not under the mat. Not in a fake rock alongside the step. Not in the flowerpot.

'Everyone leaves a key somewhere,' I said to Meri.

I felt on top of the doorjamb. Bingo. The key. The door opened a crack but wouldn't go any further. The body was in the way. I forced the door to open enough for me to get my foot in, and then I shoved the body with my foot.

We squeezed in, carefully stepping over the body. We compared the body to the picture on the bond agreement. Charles Chin, all right.

'Is he dead?' Meri wanted to know.

I bent to take a closer look. He was breathing, and he smelled like he just crawled out of a bottle.

'Drunk,' I said, clapping the cuffs on him. 'I love apprehending unconscious people.'

We each got under an armpit and dragged Charles Chin out of his house and stuffed him into the back seat of my car. I went back to lock up and my phone rang.

'He isn't dead is he?' Ranger asked.

'No. Drunk. Where are you?'

'I'm almost a block away. Tank was supposed to be keeping his eye on you, but he had a nooner, so I'm filling in. Who's riding with you?'

'Meri Maisonet. She's the new BEA. No experience, but she seems okay.'

I disconnected, locked up, and went back to the car.

'Now what?' Meri asked.

'Now we take him to the police station and get him checked in. If he was sober I'd call Vinnie or Connie and try to get him rebooked while court was in session. Since he's out like a light, he's going to have to sleep it off in a cell.'

***

It was mid-afternoon by the time we returned to the bonds office. Lula was out shopping. Melvin had gone through all the filing and was making new tabs for the file cabinets. Connie was surfing eBay. Vinnie's door was closed.

I gave Connie my body receipt. 'Anything new I should know about?'

'Nope. Nothing new. All the bad guys have gone to the shore for the weekend.'

'I'm heading out then. See you tomorrow.'

I slid behind the wheel and called Morelli.

'What's happening?' I asked.

'Murder, mayhem. The usual stuff.'

'Are you up for dinner with my parents?'

'Yeah, I'm afraid if I don't fill that seat you'll bring in the second team.'

'Very funny. See you there at six.'

***

Ranger followed me into my apartment. 'My radar is humming so loud it's giving me a headache. This guy is