If I Die

you’re uniquely suited to what we do. And frankly, we’re drastically understaffed.”

“Can you…make me alive again?”

“No, not like you were.” Madeline glanced at her hands, clasped in front of her. “Unfortunately, no one can do that. But we can do almost as well.”

“You’d exist in form similar to that of a reaper,” Levi supplied. “But with a different skill set.”

Like a reaper. Like Tod, who’d had a physical form whenever he’d wanted it. Who’d been able to stay with his family. Until I’d gotten him killed, and Nash framed for my murder.

“No,” I repeated, eyeing Madeline steadily. “I’ve seen how you reward people cursed with an afterlife. No way.”

“I don’t think you understand the opportunity you’re passing up, Kaylee.” Madeline crossed her arms over her suit jacket. “Not just for you, but for everyone you care about. As things stand now, your best friend is devastated and your father is inconsolable. And your boyfriend…”

“Ex…” Levi supplied, laying one arm on the gurney, over the sheet that covered me.

Madeline began again. “Your ex-boyfriend is sitting in a jail cell, sick with withdrawal from a very powerful substance and about to be charged with your murder.”

“But that’s not possible.” My hands clenched around the cold sheet in frustration and anger. “I killed Mr. Beck. They must have found his body. They have to know he killed me.” Yet I couldn’t quite wrap my mind around the sentence I’d just spoken.

Levi watched me in what may have been sympathy. Or possibly impatience. “Kaylee, you and the incubus were stabbed with the same instrument, seconds apart, on your bed. At the moment, the police believe that Nash found you there together, and that he killed you both in a jealous rage.”

I shook my head, clinging to denial. “Fingerprints. His fingerprints aren’t there.”

Levi shrugged. “They’ll say he wiped them off. He’s a smart boy. Smart enough to wrap your dying hands around the hilt of the knife.”

“No!” My dad would know better, as would Harmony, Emma and Sabine. But no one had actually seen Beck stab me—Em and Sophie had already been asleep when he’d arrived—and thanks to her criminal record, Sabine would make the world’s worst alibi for Nash.

Nash could actually go down for this. And without Tod to break him out, he would spend the rest of his life in jail. Because I’d helped Beck frame him.

I couldn’t let that happen.

“You’re saying that if I do this thing for you, this job, you’ll help Nash?”

Madeline frowned, and I knew I wasn’t going to like whatever came next. “It’s more than just this one job, Kaylee. It’s a commitment to work for the reclamation department. In exchange, you’ll be granted an afterlife with certain physical privileges—and a few unavoidable limitations—for as long as you remain in our employ.”

“Limitations?”

She lifted one brow in what may have been amusement. “Most people are more interested in the advantages.”

“Fine,” I snapped. “What are those?”

“Immortality, of course. Agelessness.”

“Those sound like limitations to me. Who wants to be sixteen forever?” And alone, at that. I didn’t want to watch my friends and family age and die. I didn’t want the world to move on without me. I didn’t want to face eternity on my own.

And she must have seen that on my face.

“And, of course, the biggest advantage is the chance to help Mr. Hudson.”

She meant Nash. But I couldn’t help thinking about Tod, too. He’d died—again—for me.

“Would you really let Nash go down for my murder, knowing he’s innocent?” I demanded.

“Would you?” Madeline’s gaze held steady. Based on her eyes, I knew she had a soul, but based on her cold, hard demeanor, I’d guess she hadn’t recently found use for her heart. “We can’t intervene on behalf of every innocent man sent to prison, Kaylee. The reclamation department is only willing to expend its resources on Nash’s behalf if we’ll be getting something in return—your services. It’s your choice.”

“What could you do for him?”

“As a signing bonus, if you agree to work for us, the reclamation department will arrange for Mr. Hudson’s escape from police custody.”

“So he can be on the run for the rest of his life? No way.” I shook my head firmly, desperately hoping I wasn’t pushing my luck. Hoping they needed me as badly as it sounded like they needed me.

“How long since I died?” I asked. If Nash hadn’t been charged yet, it couldn’t have been that long.

“Only a couple of hours,” Madeline answered.

“But…” That didn’t make any sense. “It took you guys more than a week to bring Tod back as a reaper after he died.” He’d actually been buried and everything.

Madeline glanced at Levi with a small, arrogant smile, then met my gaze again. “Reapers are a dime a dozen, Kaylee. The reclamation department has considerably more resources and, in this case, much stronger motivation. We need your help with something very important, and we need it soon. So we expedited the process.”

I nodded slowly, still thinking. “You have to make it go away, or my answer’s no.”

“You want us to clear Nash’s name?”

“No, I want to clear his name.” I’d dragged him into this; I had to get him out of it. “I want you to make the crime disappear. No murder. I was attacked by my math teacher—to which I’m willing to testify—but I survived, and Nash had nothing to do with it.”

“Kaylee, we can’t reverse your death.”

“I know.” I sucked in a deep breath, relieved that my lungs seemed to work, even if my heart didn’t. “But you can cover it up. If I work for you, I get to keep my body, right? Like Tod did?”

“You can become corporeal at will, yes,” Madeline said slowly, obviously starting to follow my train of thought.

“Then who says I died? I haven’t been buried. I haven’t been autopsied…”

“Kaylee, you died in a public hospital,” Levi pointed out. “Your death has been documented. It was witnessed.”

I shrugged, still watching Madeline. “So make the paperwork go away. The news stories could just be false reports of my death. That’s happened before, right? And you can make the witnesses forget, can’t you? People see things. It’s inevitable. So someone must be cleaning up after them, right? You must have someone who can make them forget…”

Her frown deepened, but I could see the possibility in her eyes. “Kaylee, what you’re suggesting is quite complicated and would require considerable resources….”

“But you can do it, right?” I held my breath—or rather, I stopped breathing—waiting for her answer, hoping I was right.

Madeline glanced at Levi, and he shrugged. Then she turned to me again. “Yes. It’s possible. But only at great expense, and I’m not convinced your services are worth what you’re asking for.”

“Really?” I lifted my eyebrows, resisting the urge to cross my fingers. “So, you have other female bean sidhes? You already have someone who can call out to the soul you want reclaimed?”

I knew I’d won when her gaze narrowed and her jaw clenched.

“Fine. It’ll take a couple of hours to set up, but…you never died. You were transferred to a private hospital to recover, and you’ll be rejoining your classmates in a couple of weeks. After you’ve finished this first job for us.” I nodded, trying not to visibly gloat. “But Kaylee, that won’t last,” she warned. “You can finish school—you might even make it through college—but eventually people are going to notice that you don’t age. You’re going to have to disappear.”

“I know.” But that was no big deal—if I’d lived, I’d have looked thirty on my one hundredth birthday. I’d always expected to have to disappear eventually.

I took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. “There’s one more thing….”

Madeline blew on my signature to dry the ink, then handed me my copy of the contract. I’d read the whole thing, and even understood most of it. And thanks to Addison’s mistakes, I knew to demand my own copy.