any right to be angry at you for being with Erik. It's not even my business.'
Slowly, I touched his chin, turning his face back to me so that he could meet my eyes. 'Do you want it to be your business?'
'More than I can tell you,' he said. Then he dropped the book—he'd still been holding it—and framed my face in his hands, so that his thumbs rested close to my lips and his fingers splayed back into my hair. 'I believe it's my turn for a birthday kiss.'
He claimed my mouth and at the same time it felt like he claimed my body and soul. Okay, Erik was a good kisser. And I've been kissing Heath since I was in third grade and he was in fourth, so Heath's kisses were familiar and good. Loren was a man. When he kissed me there was none of the awkward hesitation I was used to. His lips and tongue said he knew exactly what he wanted and he also knew how to get it. And a weird, magical thing happed to me. I wasn't just some kid anymore when I kissed him back. I was a woman, mature and powerful, and I knew what I wanted and how to get it, too.
When the kiss ended both of us were breathing hard. Loren still held my face in his hands, but he'd moved away just far enough so that we could look into each other's eyes again.
'I shouldn't have done that,' he said.
'I know,' I said, but that didn't stop me from staring boldly at him. I was still clutching the stupid healing rituals and spells book with one hand, but my other hand was resting on his chest. Slowly I spread my fingers so that they slid within the open neck of his button-up shirt to touch his naked skin. He shivered and I felt that shiver somewhere deep inside me.
'This is going to be complicated,' he said.
'I know,' I repeated.
'But I don't want to stop.'
'Neither do I,' I said.
'No one can know about us. At least not yet.'
'Okay.' I nodded, not sure what there was to know about, but understanding that the thought of his asking me to sneak around with him made a weird knot form in the pit of my stomach.
He kissed me again. This time his lips were sweet and warm and very, very gentle, and I felt the weird knot dissolving. 'I almost forgot,' he whispered against my lips. 'I have something for you.' He gave me one more fast kiss and then fished into the pocket of his black slacks for something. Smiling, he pulled out a small gold jeweler's box. Holding it out to me he said, 'Happy birthday, Zoey.'
My heart was flopping ridiculously around in my chest as I opened the box—and gasped. 'Ohmygod! They're amazing!' Diamond stud earrings glittered at me like a beautiful, captured dream. They weren't huge and gaudy, but small and dainty and so clear and sparkly that they almost hurt my eyes. For an instant I saw Erik's sweet smile as he'd given me the snowman necklace, and then heard my grandma's voice in my conscience telling me that there's no way I should accept such an expensive gift from a man, but Loren's voice drowned out the image of Erik along with Grandma's warning.
'I saw them and they reminded me of you—perfect and exquisite and fiery.'
'Oh, Loren! I've never had anything so beautiful.' I leaned into him, tilting my face up, and he bent and put his arms around me and kissed me until I thought the top of my head would explode.
'Go ahead, put them on,' Loren whispered to me while I was still trying to get my breath back after our kiss.
I hadn't put any earrings on when I got up, so it only took me a second to stick them through my ears.
'There's an old beveled mirror over in the reading corner. Come look at them.' We stuck the books back on the shelf and Loren took my hand, guiding me over to the cozy corner of the media center that had a big, overstuffed sofa and two matching comfy chairs. On the wall between them was a large, obviously antique, gold- framed beveled mirror. Loren stood behind me with his hands on my shoulders so that both of us were reflected in the mirror. I pushed my thick hair behind my ears and turned my head from side to side so that the flickering gaslights caught the diamonds' facets so they glistened brilliantly.
'They're beautiful,' I said.
Loren squeezed my shoulders and pulled me back against him. 'Yes, you are,' he said. Then, still holding my gaze in the mirror, he bent to nuzzle one of my diamond decorated earlobes and whispered, 'I think you've done enough studying for one day. Come back to my room with me.'
I watched my eyes become all heavy-lidded as he kissed my neck, following the path my tattoos took down to my shoulder. Then I realized what it was he was really asking and a jolt of fright bolted through my body. He wanted me to go back to his room and have sex! I didn't want to do that! Okay, well, maybe I did. In theory anyway. But to
Loren smiled. 'You are a diligent little Leader of the Dark Daughters, aren't you? Then it will have to be another time.' He moved to me, and I thought he'd kiss me again. Instead he touched my face, briefly caressing my tattoos. His touch made me all shivery and breathless. 'If you change your mind I'll be in the poet's loft. You know where that is?'
I nodded, still finding it hard to speak. Everyone knew the in-residence Poet Laureate had the whole third floor of the professors' quarters building all to himself. More than once I'd listened to the Twins fantasize about wrapping up like giant presents and having themselves delivered to the lurve loft (as they call it).
'Good. You should know I'll be thinking about you, even if you don't decide to come put me out of my misery.'
He had already turned and was walking away when I found my voice. 'But I really can't come, so when am I going to see you again?'
He looked over his shoulder at me, smiling his sexy, knowing smile. 'Don't worry, my little High Priestess, I will come to you.'
When he was gone I sat heavily on the couch. My legs felt like rubber and my heart was beating so hard it hurt. Shakily, I touched one of the diamond earrings. It felt cold, unlike the snowman made of pearls that rested accusatorily around my neck and the silver bracelet that was clasping my wrist. They felt hot. I put my face in my hands and said miserably, 'I think I'm turning into a ho.'
CHAPTER 8
Everyone was already there when I rushed up. Even Nala was there. I swear she looked at me with eyes that said she knew exactly what I'd been up to in the library. Then she shot a grumpy 'mee-uf-ow!' in my general direction, sneezed, and padded away. God, I'm so glad she can't talk.
Suddenly Erik's arms were around me. He kissed me quickly and then hugged me while he whispered in my ear, 'I've been looking forward to seeing you all day.'
'Well, I was in the library.' I realized my tone was way too abrupt and hateful (in other words, guilty) when he pulled away from me and gave me a sweet but confused smile.
'Yeah, that's what the Twins told us.'
I looked into his eyes, feeling utterly like poo. How could I even take a chance at losing him? I should never have let Loren kiss me. It was wrong. I knew it was wrong and—
'Hey, Z, nice scarf,' Damien said, tugging on the end of one of the snowmen and interrupting my guilty mental tirade.
'Thanks, my boyfriend gave it to me,' I tried a lame tease, but knew that I sounded all weird and overly perkly.
'By that little comment she means her friend who is a boy,' Shaunee said, giving me an eye roll.
'Yeah, don't stress Jack,' Erin said. 'Damien's not changing teams.'
