Stevie Rae reached over and took my hand. Squeezing it, she whispered, “It’s okay, just pretend like there’s no one here except us. You can tell me.”
I looked at my BFF and blurted, “It’s so awful that I don’t know what really happened to her.”
“Why do you think that is what saddens you the most?”
From the stage Thanatos asked the question, but I kept looking at Stevie Rae. She smiled and said, “How come it would be better if you knew what happened to your momma?”
“Because someone needs to pay for what was done to her,” I told my BFF.
“Vengeance?” Thanatos asked.
Then I did look at her. “No. Justice,” I said firmly.
“It is admirable as well as understandable for you to desire justice. Let this be a lesson to the rest of you— there is a distinct difference between wanting to gain revenge and exact vengeance, and wanting the truth to shine forth so that justice for all is illuminated.” Thanatos met my gaze. “I believe I can help give you the truth, so that you will be able to get justice for your mother and closure for yourself.”
“What do you mean?”
“I spoke with your grandmother. Today is the fifth night after your mother’s death. I explained to her that five is an important number in our belief system—it represents the elements and our closeness to them. She has agreed to pause her traditional cleansing on this, the fifth night. It is not a certainty, but with the elemental power held by your circle and your connection to the one whose death we seek to reveal, I believe I can illuminate the truth of your mother’s murder if you are willing to cast your circle and witness what it reveals.”
“I’m willing.” I felt sick, but I knew I had to go through with this.
“There is more,” Thanatos said. She looked from me to Stevie Rae. “Zoey will cast the circle. I will be there to invoke the presence of death, but the spell that invokes death hinges upon you.”
“Me?” Stevie Rae squeaked.
“It is your element in which this deed was imprinted. It is through your element the truth of it will be revealed.” Thanatos’s gaze sought out each member of my circle as she continued explaining. “This spell will not be pleasant. Zoey’s mother was murdered. If we are successful, we will witness that horrendous act. You must each be willing participants, focused and aware of what it is you are agreeing to.”
“I’m willing,” Stevie Rae said immediately.
“Me, too … Yep, I’m in … I’m willing,” came from Shaunee and Damien and Erin.
“Then it is decided. We leave as soon as first hour is over. If I call your name you will assemble in the parking lot and prepare yourself for the ritual and spell. If I do not call your name please proceed to your second-hour class. Your homework will be an essay on loss—and that homework will be due from those participating in the ritual as well as those of you who do not. The students joining me are: Zoey, Stevie Rae, Damien, Shaunee, Erin, and Aphrodite. The rest of you may begin working on your essays. Good day to you, and blessed be.” Thanatos bowed formally to her classroom and then went to sit behind her desk.
My mouth flopped open. As Grandma would have said, this whole thing flummoxed me.
Aphrodite plopped down in the desk beside me and hissed a whisper. “Talk to Thanatos. Be sure she doesn’t let Dragon go with us.” She paused, tilted her head, and gawked at Stevie Rae and Rephaim, who totally had their heads together and were talking like a mile a minute. “Unless I’m wrong—and I’m never wrong—she’s gonna insist birdboy goes with us, which is no surprise because I can promise you Darius won’t let me go without him. But having Rephaim with us means Dragon can’t go or, according to my vision, he’s gonna get sliced in two.”
“Hell!” I said.
“Cursing?” Aphrodite said.
“No. It’s a place. I didn’t send anyone there,” I said.
“Grow up,” she said.
“Screw you,” I said, succinctly.
Aphrodite laughed, which totally took the Big Girl sting from my almost-curse. I sighed and as the bell chimed, got out of my desk and walked slowly but resolutely up to Thanatos.
From her seat behind her desk Thanatos glanced up, but her eyes didn’t go to me. Instead she glanced around me and called, “Aurox, a moment please.”
Aurox had been leaving class, but he stopped and turned. “You want me, Priestess?”
“I want to give you an answer to your question.”
“Uh, I’ll wait outside so you two can—”
“There is no need for you to leave.” Thanatos cut me off. “My answer is the same for whomever is asking the question.”
“I do not understand,” Aurox said.
Actually, neither did I. His question was “What am I?” How could there be only one answer for that question?
“I believe you will understand when you hear me out. The question of what we are can only be answered by ourselves. We each decide what we are by the life choices we make. How we were made, who are parents are, where we are from, the color of our skin, who we choose to love, all those things do not define us. Our actions define us, and will keep defining us until even after death.”
I saw surprise in Aurox’s expression. “The past does not matter?”
“The past matters a great deal, especially if we don’t learn from it. But the future need not be dictated by the past.”
“I decide what I am?” He spoke slowly, as if he was working through a riddle.
“Yes.”
“Thank you, Priestess.”
“You are welcome and you may be excused now.”
He fisted his hand over his heart and bowed deeply to her before leaving the room.
I was looking after him, still thinking about the surprise I’d seen in Aurox when Thanatos spoke to me. “Zoey, I know this ritual and the spell casting will be difficult for you, but I believe it will also give you closure.”
“Yeah, me, too.” Feeling a little like a kid caught with her hand in the cookie jar, I spoke quickly, my eyes turning to Thanatos. “I mean, I don’t want to do it. I don’t want to see what happened to Mom, but I figure I keep replaying it in my imagination anyway. The truth will at least stop my imagination.”
“It will do that,” she said.
“So, this ritual—who all will be there?”
“Those I named already. I would imagine your Guardian will accompany you, as will Aphrodite’s Darius. And I will be there. Follow your instincts, Zoey. Is there anyone else you request?”
Aurox’s presence seemed to linger in the room with us and I shook my head. “No, I don’t want to request anyone else. My circle and our Warriors are all that I need, but there is someone I
“Dragon Lankford has been tasked with protecting this school and its students. If he allows, or takes part in, Rephaim being injured a great injustice will have been committed and he must be brought to task quickly and —”
“Wait, stop.” I interrupted her. “I don’t want this spell to be some kind of setup for Dragon to get in trouble. I don’t want any of that drama to touch what’s happened to my mom. Her murder is drama enough. Can’t you just help me be sure Dragon’s not there? We’ll deal with his issues later.”
Thanatos bowed her head slightly. “You have a valid point, and you are right to remind me. Your mother’s death is not the appropriate venue to test Dragon or to illuminate his failings. I shall see that he does not accompany us.”
“Thanks,” I said.
“Thank me when the ritual and spellcasting is over. I’ve found quite often that the dead reveal things that should have been kept hidden from the living.”
And on that ominous note I left death’s classroom and made my way to the parking lot and to a future none of us would have been able to predict.
