Almost Perfect

valley. He could hear the campers enjoying their free time between dinner and lights-out with a game of tag out on the playing field. 'I was up at the Craft Shack having a nice cup of tea with Madeline. She showed me some of the artwork she's done for the show. What talent that girl has!'

'Yes, I know.' His gut twisted at the mere mention of her name.

Mama leaned forward to lay an envelope in front of him. 'She asked me to give this to you.'

'What is it?' He frowned suspiciously at the envelope. As strained as things had been between them the last few days, it could be anything from a scathing note telling him off to a letter of resignation. The thought of the latter sent panic racing through him. Seeing her every day was killing him by slow degrees, but it was better than not seeing her at all.

'Well?' his mother prompted. 'Aren't you going to open it?'

Bracing himself for a 'Dear John, screw you' note, he sliced the envelope open with a knife, then stared at the printed card inside. 'It's an invitation to Maddy's show.'

'So it is.'

He felt a surge of hope, followed by frustration. 'What? She couldn't be bothered to hand it to me in person?'

'With the way you've been acting lately?' His mother lifted a brow at him. 'Maybe she didn't want to get growled at.'

His teeth clamped together. 'I haven't been growling at her.'

'No?' She chuckled, then sighed. 'Maybe not, but you have made it clear you don't want her here.'

'Did she tell you that?' He fought the need to get up and pace.

'No. But I have eyes. You've been giving her the classic freeze-out for more than a week now.' She shook her head sadly. 'And just when I thought things were going well between you two.'

'They were going well, until she-'

'Until she what?

'Nothing.' He straightened a stack of papers on his desk.

'Joe, do you want Maddy to leave?'

'No!' Alarm kicked up his heart rate. 'I want-'

'What?'

Everything! he nearly shouted. i want her to love me and mean it this time. The way I love her so much it's eating me up inside. I want her to love me the way she loved Nigel the Geek.

Just thinking the name made him want to rip something apart. Instead he went back to shuffling papers. 'If Maddy sent you down here to act as a go-between, tell her there's no reason for her to leave. I'm perfectly capable of respecting the boundaries she set.'

'Are you saying she's the one freezing you Out?'

'It's not that simple.' He scrubbed a hand over his face. 'Look, I appreciate your concern, but I'm really not comfortable discussing certain things with my mother.'

'Ah.' A knowing twinkle came into her eyes. 'She cut you off.'

'Mom.' Heat crept up his neck. 'Do you mind?'

She laughed. 'No wonder you're so grouchy.'

'I'm not grouchy.'

'Moody, then. Lack of sex can do that to a man.'

He glared at her. 'You're determined to discuss this, aren't you?'

She settled back in the chair. 'How about if I save you from talking by telling you a story?'

'Suit yourself.' He went back to his paperwork.

'I remember when I met the Colonel.'

He groaned aloud at those familiar words, even though he liked this story. He just hated that it had a different purpose each time she told it.

'It was at a USO dance during the war. Not too many people considered him to be a particularly handsome man, even back then. But he was…' She tipped her head as if picturing him in her mind, and a glow came over her face. 'Compelling.'

Joe narrowed his eyes. 'Last time you told this story, he was 'frightening.' '

'That too.' She laughed. 'I can still picture him as he walked into the room, scowling at everyone. The other girls were all too scared to go over and greet him, even though that was what we were there for, to make the servicemen feel at home. To get their minds off the war for a bit. So I watched him for a long time. Long enough to see how he looked at the couples cutting a rug on the dance floor, with this odd blend of longing and fear. Then he'd look at us girls and scowl even harder. I finally realized he was even more afraid of us than we were of him.' Her eyes twinkled with laughter.

'So I marched right over there, my knees shaking the whole way-because what if I was wrong? Maybe he was as mean as he looked. I had no guarantee he wouldn't plumb take my head off in one big bite. Things are like that between men and women, you know. Very scary, with no guarantees.'

Joe frowned in confusion. 'We're already at the moral of the story?'

'Heavens no. The moral comes at the end. Now where was I?'

'You asked the Colonel to dance, only he wasn't a colonel back then. He was Major Patrick Fraser.'

'Right. I asked him if he wanted to dance. He looked down at me from way up there.' She tipped her head back, looking up, then rolled her eyes sideways to look at Joe. 'Even before my bones shrank, I wasn't too tall. And do you know what he said?'

Joe lowered his voice to a deep bass. ' 'I'm not sure that's wise, miss, since my feet are bigger than all of you put together.' '

She nodded. 'So I asked him if he'd like to sit and talk instead. We were the last two to leave the USO that evening, and then only because they kicked us out. Major Patrick Fraser walked me out to my car. We didn't say a word the whole way across the big empty parking lot. I thought maybe he was mad at me because I'd teased him a bit about his big feet as we were leaving. Later he confessed it was because he wanted to kiss me so bad his knees were shaking.

'Imagine that.' She grinned. 'The Colonel with shaky knees.'

'It happens to the best of men.' Joe scowled at her.

'Yes, it does.' She smothered her amusement. 'When we reached my car, he mustered the courage to ask if he could kiss me. I said yes, of course, very matter-of-factly, expecting a peck good night.

But when he kissed me…' She patted her heart as her eyes turned dreamy. 'Oh, when he kissed me… I knew. I just knew he was the man for me, no matter what the future held. I was gonna love that man as long as God let me.'

Her eyes focused again, right on Joe, and he knew it was coming: the moral of the story.

'Now just imagine if I hadn't gotten up the courage to ask him to dance, or if he hadn't gotten up the courage to kiss me good night. We may have found happiness elsewhere, but I'm convinced it wouldn't have been near as rich. Some things are just meant. That doesn't mean happiness will fall into your lap. You have to work past the scary stage to earn it, then nurture it daily once you have it.'

'And you think Maddy and I are 'meant'?'

'What do you think?'

'I think things don't always work out the way we want. And loving someone isn't always enough. Look at Jimmy,' he said, referring to one of the older foster boys who had left the Frasers' home long before Joe arrived. Last they'd heard, Jimmy was serving a second prison sentence. 'You gave him the same love you gave all of us, but even that wasn't enough. You can't tell me he didn't hurt you.'

She nodded thoughtfully. 'I hurt when I think of Jimmy, but I hurt for him, not for me. I don't regret opening my home and my heart to him. The Colonel and I gave him everything we knew how to give. But we gave it freely. There was no price tag attached. No stipulation that Jimmy had to do something with that love to please us.'

'But he hurt you.'

'He's hurt himself far more than he's hurt me.' Her pale blue gaze bored into him. 'Joe, love can be both joyous and painful. It's like an amusement park. You can ride the carousel, and go 'round and 'round nice and slow, or you can take the glunge on the roller coaster with all its big highs and lows.