would not give sixpence to have it back. I had almost forgot it already. THOMASINA Oh, cruel! Have you forgotten our compact? SEPTIMUS God save me! Our compact? THOMASINA TO teach me to waltz! Sealed with a kiss, and a second kiss due
when I can dance like mama! SEPTIMUS Ah yes. Indeed. We were all waltzing like mice in London. THOMASINA I must waltz, Septimus! I will be despised if I do not waltz! It is
the most fashionable and gayest and boldest invention conceivable?started
in Germany! SEPTIMUS Let them have the waltz, they cannot have the calculus. THOMASINA Mama has brought from town a whole book of waltzes for the
Broadwood,9 to play with Count Zelinsky. SEPTIMUS I need not be told what I cannot but suffer. Count Zelinsky banging
on the Broadwood without relief has me reading in waltz time. THOMASINA Oh, stuff! What is your book? SEPTIMUS A prize essay of the Scientific Academy in Paris. The author
deserves your indulgence, my lady, for you are his prophet. THOMASINA I? What does he write about? The waltz? SEPTIMUS Yes. He demonstrates the equation of the propagation of heat in a
solid body.1 But in doing so he has discovered heresy?a natural contradic
tion of Sir Isaac Newton. THOMASINA Oh!?he contradicts determinism? SEPTIMUS No! . . . Well, perhaps. He shows that the atoms do not go accord
ing to Newton.
[Her interest has switched in the mercurial way characteristic of her? she has crossed to take the hook. ]
THOMASINA Let me see?oh! In French?
SEPTIMUS Yes. Paris is the capital of France.
THOMASINA Show me where to read.
[He takes the book back from her and finds the page for her. Meanwhile,
8. British coin (before decimalization) equal to The French scientist most relevant is Sadi Carnot, twelve old pennies/pence, or one-twentieth of a founder of thermodynamics; but he was only six- pound. teen in 1812. The essay is about the passing of heat 9. Brand of piano. from one body to another, which is why Septimus 1. 'Paris was the center of such studies: in 1807 can humourously agree that it is 'about* the Jean-Baptiste Fourier had written about heat flow. 'waltz' ' (Jim Hunter, Tom Stoppard, 2000).
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ARCADIA II.7 / 2809
the piano music from the next room has doubled its notes and its emotion.]
THOMASINA Four-handed now! Mama is in love with the Count. SEPTIMUS He is a Count in Poland. In Derbyshire he is a piano tuner.
[She has taken the book and is already immersed in it. The piano music becomes rapidly more passionate, and then breaks off suddenly in mid- phrase. There is an expressive silence next door which makes SEPTIMUS raise his eyes. It does not register with THOMASINA. The silence allows us to hear the distant regular thump of the steam engine which is to be a topic. A few moments later LADY CROOM enters from the music room, seeming surprised and slightly flustered to find the schoolroom occupied. She collects herself, closing the door behind her. And remains watching, aimless and discreet, as though not wanting to interrupt the lesson. SEPTIMUS has stood, and she nods him back into his chair.
CHLOE, in Regency dress, enters from the door opposite the music room. She takes in VALENTINE and HANNAH but crosses without pausing to the music room door.]
CHLOE Oh!?where's Gus? VALENTINE Dunno. [CHLOE goes into the music room.] LADY CROOM [Annoyed] Oh!?Mr Noakes's engine! [She goes to the garden door and steps outside.
CHLOE re-enters.] CHLOE Damn. LADY CROOM [Calls out.] Mr Noakes! VALENTINE He was there not long ago . . . LADY CROOM Halloo! CHLOE Well, he has to be in the photograph?is he dressed? HANNAH Is Bernard back? CHLOE NO?he's late!
[The piano is heard again, under the noise of the steam engine, LADY CROOM steps back into the room.
CHLOE steps outside the garden door. Shouts.] Gus! LADY CROOM I wonder you can teach against such a disturbance and I am sorry for it, Mr Hodge.
[CHLOE comes back inside.] VALENTINE [Getting up.] Stop ordering everybody about. LADY CROOM It is an unendurable noise. VALENTINE The photographer will wait.
[But, grumbling, he follows CHLOE out of the door she came in by, and closes the door behind them, HANNAH remains absorbed. In the silence, the rhythmic thump can be heard again.]
LADY CROOM The ceaseless dull overbearing monotony of it! It will drive me distracted. I may have to return to town to escape it. SEPTIMUS Your ladyship could remain in the country and let Count Zelinsky return to town where you would not hear him. LADY CROOM I mean Mr Noakes's engine! [Semi-aside to SEPTIMUS.] Would you sulk? I will not have my daughter study sulking.
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2810 / TOM STOPPARD
THOMASINA [Not listening.] What, mama? [THOMASINA remains lost in her hook, LADY CROOM returns to close the garden door and the noise of the steam engine subsides.
HANNAH closes one of the 'garden books', and opens the next. She is making occasional notes.
The piano ceases.] LADY CROOM [To THOMASINA.] What are we learning today? [Pause.] Well, not
