much notice .. . as far as any improvement in his ailments goes. I should
5. Pronounced with the accent on the second syl-7. Round griddle breads, served toasted. lable. 8. Because otherwise she would have more 6. Immediate payment in cash (rather than on women than men at the table. credit).
.
1 1706 / OSCAR WILDE
be obliged if you would ask Mr. Bunbury, from me, to be kind enough not
to have a relapse on Saturday, for I rely on you to arrange my music for me.
It is my last reception, and one wants something that will encourage con
versation, particularly at the end of the season9 when everyone has practi
cally said whatever they had to say, which, in most cases, was probably not
much.
ALGERNON I'll speak to Bunbury, Aunt Augusta, if he is still conscious, and I think I can promise you he'll be all right by Saturday. Of course the music is a great difficulty. You see, if one plays good music, people don't listen, and if one plays bad music, people don't talk. But I'll run over the program I've drawn out, if you will kindly come into the next room for a moment. LADY BRACKNELL Thank you, Algernon. It is very thoughtful of you. [Rising, and following ALGERNON.] I'm sure the program will be delightful, after a few expurgations. French songs I cannot possibly allow. People always seem to think that they are improper, and either look shocked, which is vulgar, or laugh, which is worse. But German sounds a thoroughly respectable language, and indeed, I believe is so. Gwendolen, you will accompany me. GWENDOLEN
Certainly, mamma.
[LADY BRACKNELL and ALGERNON go into the music room, GWENDOLEN remains behind.]
JACK Charming day it has been, Miss Fairfax.
GWENDOLEN
Pray don't talk to me about the weather, Mr. Worthing. When
ever people talk to me about the weather, I always feel quite certain that
they mean something else. And that makes me so nervous.
JACK I do mean something else.
GWENDOLEN
I thought so. In fact, I am never wrong.
JACK
And I would like to be allowed to take advantage of Lady Bracknell's
temporary absence . . .
GWENDOLEN
I would certainly advise you to do so. Mamma has a way of
coming back suddenly into a room that I have often had to speak to her
about.
JACK [Nei~vously. ] Miss Fairfax, ever since I met you I have admired you more than any girl .. . I have ever met since .. . I met you. GWENDOLEN
Yes, I am quite aware of the fact. And I often wish that in public,
at any rate, you had been more demonstrative. For me you have always had
an irresistible fascination. Even before I met you I was far from indifferent
to you. [JACK looks at her in amazement.] We live, as I hope you know, Mr.
Worthing, in an age of ideals. The fact is constantly mentioned in the more
expensive monthly magazines, and has reached the provincial pulpits, I am
told: and my ideal has always been to love someone of the name of Ernest.
There is something in that name that inspires absolute confidence. The
moment Algernon first mentioned to me that he had a friend called Ernest,
I knew I was destined to love you.
JACK
You really love me, Gwendolen?
GWENDOLEN
Passionately!
JACK
Darling! You don't know how happy you've made me.
