Yes, but you have been christened. That is the important thing.
ALGERNON
Quite so. So I know my constitution can stand it. If you are not
quite sure about your ever having been christened, I must say I think it
rather dangerous your venturing on it now. It might make you very unwell.
You can hardly have forgotten that someone very closely connected with
you was very nearly carried off this week in Paris by a severe chill.
JACK
Yes, but you said yourself that a severe chill was not hereditary.
ALGERNON
It usen't to be, I know?but I daresay it is now. Science is always making wonderful improvements in things. JACK [Picking up the muffin dish.] Oh, that is nonsense; you are always talking nonsense.
.
THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING EARNEST, ACT 1 / 17 11
ALGERNON
Jack, you are at the muffins again! I wish you wouldn't. There are only two left. [Takes them..] I told you I was particularly fond of muffins.
JACK
But I hate tea cake.
ALGERNON
Why on earth then do you allow tea cake to be served up for your
guests? What ideas you have of hospitality!
JACK
Algernon! I have already told you to go. I don't want you here. Why
don't you go!
ALGERNON
I haven't quite finished my tea yet! and there is still one muffin left. [Jack groans, and sinks into a chair. ALGERNON still continues eating.] ACT-DROP
Third Act
SCENE?Morning room5 at the Manor House.
[GWENDOLEN and CECILY are at the window, looking out into the garden.]
GWENDOLEN
The fact that they did not follow us at once into the house, as
anyone else would have done, seems to me to show that they have some
sense of shame left.
CECILY
They have been eating muffins. That looks like repentance. GWENDOLEN [After a pause.] They don't seem to notice us at all. Couldn't you cough?
CECILY
But I haven't got a cough.
GWENDOLEN
They're looking at us. What effrontery!
CECILY
They're approaching. That's very forward of them.
GWENDOLEN
Let us preserve a dignified silence.
CECILY
Certainly. It's the only thing to do now.
[Enter JACK followed by ALGERNON. They whistle some dreadful popular air from a British Opera.6]
GWENDOLEN
This dignified silence seems to produce an unpleasant effect. CECILY A most distasteful one. GWENDOLEN
