Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality

Besides, she didn't want to lose, and if she wanted to win she had to learn.

'So you will be in the armies, then?' Harry's voice was suddenly enthusiastic. 'That's awesome, Hermione! I've already gotten my list of soldiers, but I'm sure Professor Quirrell will let me add one more, or trade -'

'I'm not joining your army.' Hermione's voice was sharp. She knew it was a reasonable assumption but it still annoyed her.

Harry blinked. 'Not Draco Malfoy's, surely. So you want to be in the third army? Even though we don't know who the general is yet?' Harry sounded surprised and a little wounded, and she couldn't blame him, though of course she did blame him, since in fact it was all his fault. 'But why not mine?'

'Think about it,' Hermione snapped, 'and maybe you'll work it out!'

And she sped up her stride and left Harry gaping behind her.

'Professor Quirrell,' Draco said in his most formal voice, 'I must protest your appointment of Hermione Granger as the third general.'

'Oh?' said Professor Quirrell, leaning back in his chair in a casual and relaxed manner. 'Protest away, Mr. Malfoy.'

'Granger is unfit for the position,' said Draco.

Professor Quirrell tapped a finger on his cheek thoughtfully. 'Why yes, yes she is. Do you have any further protests?'

'Professor Quirrell,' said Harry Potter beside him, 'with all due respect to Miss Granger's many outstanding academic talents and the Quirrell points she has justly earned in your classes, her personality is not suited to military command.'

Draco had been relieved when Harry had agreed to accompany him to Professor Quirrell's office. It wasn't just that Harry was a gigantic blatant teacher's pet where Professor Quirrell was concerned. Draco had also started to worry that Harry actually was friends with Granger, it had been a while now and he still hadn't made his move... but this was more like it.

'I agree with Mr. Potter,' said Draco. 'Appointing her as a general turns it into a farce.'

'Harshly put,' said Harry, 'but I cannot bring myself to disagree with Mr. Malfoy. To be blunt, Professor Quirrell, Hermione Granger has around as much intent to kill as a bowl of wet grapes.'

'That,' said Professor Quirrell mildly, 'is not a thing I would fail to notice myself. You are telling me nothing I do not already know.'

It was Draco's turn to say something, but the conversation had suddenly hiccupped. That answer had not been in the possibilities he and Harry had brainstormed before coming here. What did you say after the teacher said that he knew everything you knew and he was still going to commit an obvious mistake?

The silence stretched.

'Is this some sort of plot?' Harry said slowly.

'Must everything I do be some sort of plot?' said Professor Quirrell. 'Can't I ever create chaos just for the sake of chaos?'

Draco almost choked.

'Not in your Battle Magic class,' Harry said with calm certainty. 'Other places, maybe, but not there.'

Professor Quirrell slowly raised his eyebrows.

Harry gazed steadily back at him.

Draco shivered.

'Well then,' Professor Quirrell said. 'Neither of you seem to have considered a very simple question. Who could I appoint instead of Miss Granger?'

'Blaise Zabini,' Draco said without hesitation.

'Any other suggestions?' said Professor Quirrell, sounding quite amused.

Anthony Goldstein and Ernie Macmillan, came the thought, before Draco's common sense kicked in and ruled out mudbloods and Hufflepuffs no matter how aggressively they dueled. So instead Draco just said, 'What's wrong with Zabini?'

'I see...' Harry said slowly.

'I don't,' said Draco. 'Why not Zabini?'

Professor Quirrell looked at Draco. 'Because, Mr. Malfoy, no matter how hard he tries, he'll never be able to keep up with you or Mr. Potter.'

The shock of it staggered Draco. 'You can't believe Granger is going to -'

'He's gambling on her,' Harry said quietly. 'It's not guaranteed. The odds aren't even good. She'll probably never give us a good fight, and even if she does, it may take her months to learn. But she's the only one in our year with any chance at all of growing to beat us.'

Draco's hands twitched but didn't clench into fists. Showing up as your supporter and then backing out was a classic undermining tactic, so Harry Potter was in it with Granger and that implied -

'But Professor,' Harry went on smoothly, 'I'm worried Hermione will be miserable as the general of an army. I'm speaking as her friend now, Professor Quirrell. The competition might be good for Draco and me, but what you're asking her to do isn't good for her!'