to be an anally erotic homosexual.
This raises an important point. Should a deviate necessarily be classified as abnormal? There is considerable disagreement on this score. Some authorities consider deviates in general, and homosexuals in-particular, to be sick and recommend therapy. There is a small but growing group, however, who question the use of the term “deviation” altogether and consider so-called “deviates” to be perfectly normal, well-functioning persons who have certain preferences and tastes in the sexual area which are not shared by the majority of people.
There is much to be said on both sides of this argument. On the one hand, because deviation is not socially acceptable, except among minority groups such as the youth counterculture, persons who deviate sexually are subject to disapproval, are obliged to be secretive, and are made to feel guilty on account of their deviation. On the other hand, it can be argued that it is society itself that is sick, as Fromm insists in his Sane Society, and it is perhaps even healthier for deviates to practice their perversions than to attempt to conform. Added to this argument is the fact that overpopulation is now a major world problem and that human procreation is no longer desirable, even in the more advanced Western nations. The deviate may be actually making a worthy contribution to the human race by the diversion of his sexuality into nonprocreative channels. One can even conceive of a future world in which the mores are reversed and in which heterosexual genital sex is deviant and homosexuality and other deviations normal. In such a situation secretiveness and fear of social disapproval would cause people now considered normal to behave neurotically.
Karen's is the kind of case that refutes absolutism in the realm of sexual behavior and mores. She is a deviant, but she is not a disturbed person, being like any normal but lonely person who suffered pangs of unfulfilled yearning until she found a mate. Having found a soul mate, she was then able to enter into a normal and happy lesbian marriage.
The one major problem here, however, is how long the marriage can be expected to last. Caprio notes the frequency of homosexual pair bonds, but also suggests that very few of these last more than a year. The record is not as good as in the case of common-law marriages between men and women, which frequently are unusually stable. Unless Karen is able to maintain a more or less permanent relationship, she may be in difficulty. Her middle and later years may be lonely. Also, as frequently occurs, her later years may be plagued with regrets and self- depreciation.
“I stayed with Eileen after that. I wish there was some way that two lesbians who love each other could marry, but, in a way, I guess, we did. We went down to a church and pledged our love to each other and made vows to each other. That's a kind of marriage, I guess. It's as much a marriage as people have who live common law with each other.
“We decided that I would quit my job and move in with Eileen, and that her apartment would be our home. Money was absolutely no problem, as I said, because Eileen has an independent income and doesn't have to work. She likes to work, though, and she is very keen on her career. I like to take care of a house and all that, so it was easy for us to decide that she would be sort of the 'man' of the house, bring in the bacon, make all the decisions about money and all that, while I'd take care of the apartment, do the shopping, and everything else that a regular wife does.
“That was really a good idea we had, and it works out fine. We both really like it. Karen hates housework and doesn't have to do anything, and the only reason I worked was because I had to and it's great to have all my time to organize myself. Also, living in one of these big high-rises in New York makes us completely independent. We like it that we don't know our neighbors and that stuff. No one pays any attention to us; we have our own life. We have friends, of course, mostly young mod types, longhairs and freaks from the Village. They know we're lesby, but that's cool with them. Our friends include both homos and straights.
“But it's our sex life that's really the gas. We both love it. Okay, here's an example of what happened one night. Eileen came home, and I could hardly wait because I was really up tight. I just wanted it in the worst way. She did, too, which was really cool. It's always best when both of us really want it.
“As soon as Eileen came in the door, I went into my bad little girl act. I confessed in this really penitent way that I had overdrawn my checking account at the bank because there was this hat I just couldn't resist.
“'You're a very very bad girl,' she snapped, 'and you're really going to get it now!'
“'No, no, please,' I whimpered. 'I won't do it again. I promise I won't. I'll be real good.'-“But she grabbed me, flung me across her lap, rolled up my skirt, pulled my panties down, and began to give me a real paddling. I squealed and wiggled, begged her to stop, but she kept right on paddling me until my bottom was burning red and it hurt so much I couldn't stand it anymore.
“'Okay, come with me,” she ordered, 'and keep your dress up.'
“She yanked me toward the bathroom. I knew that that would be the second act and had everything ready for it. She pushed me in, smacked me across the bare bottom one more time, and then ordered me to bend over.
“Now she strapped on the dildoe and I felt it working up my rear end. It was marvelous. I spread my legs wide apart and bent down so that my head was between my legs.
“'Please don't, please don't.' I kept yelling, although of course I wanted it in the worst way.
“She shoved the dildoe up me as hard as she could. It just ripped and tore, or at least that's the way it felt. I kept yelling 'Ow! Ow! Ow!' and she kept snarling at me to shut up and take it. I took it all right. It was just about killing me, but I took it. Then I felt myself coming. Oh, it was delicious, like always. I just kept moaning and groaning as she banged me, and I was sorry when it was over, but it had to be because I was starting to feel pretty sore back there and my buttocks were still stinging from the paddling.
“After it was over, we both lay down for a while on the bed and then showered and got into some fresh clothes. We both felt great after that, and I went out in the kitchen and started dinner. Neither of us mentioned a word about what we had just done, and just acted as if nothing had happened at all. It was that way most of the night, up until after the news and the beginning of the late show. Then we started necking on the couch. I let her fondle me all over, my breasts, and especially the nipples, my thighs, everything, and then we went to bed. Eileen stripped me naked, taking off my clothes, garment by garment, really slowly, and then made me kneel down on the bed. After that she shoved the dildoe up my rear end again, but this time she was very gentle and pumped back and forth very very gently. I don't like that quite as well as when she's brutal with me, but it's nice and comfortable. Both of us came again doing it that way.
“We don't have sex every night; only when both of us feel in the mood, or sometimes when one of us wants it real bad. Then, even if the other one doesn't, she puts up with it. I'm the one who wants it the most.
“The funny thing, though, is that we do these crazy things, things where we're both stark naked and where she is doing very intimate things to me, but neither of us ever talk about it much. It isn't because the subject is uninteresting, it's just because both of us are really very shy. I know that doesn't make sense in view of what I just said about what we did and what we do. But it's true. We both like sex a lot, our kind of sex, and we do the darndest things; but just try talking about it and we both start to sort of blush and get tongue-tied. I don't think it's because we feel ashamed of what we do. We can talk about sex in an intellectual sort of way and both of us are very strong on women's lib and all that, and we both believe in the permissive society, and that everybody should do his own thing. But if we get on to what we do personally, with each other, it's different. We just can't discuss it.
“I don't think there's anything wrong with what Eileen and I do together, but something else happened last year, and I'm not so sure about that. It's kind of hard to talk about, but here goes.
“Eileen and I had been living together for about a year and a half when this letter came for her.
“'It's from my brother Chuck,' she said.
“He lives out on the Coast, he and his wife and Sheila, their daughter, who was around twelve then. Maybe she was a little older. I don't know much about kids and how old they are from how they look.
“'Chuck and Alicia, that's his wife, are going over to Japan on sort of a second honeymoon,' Eileen said, 'and they want to know if Sheila can stay with us for a couple of months this summer.'
“I was against it immediately. There's one thing that is sort of queer about me-well, one thing among a lot of queer things. I don't like kids. Eileen does, sort of. But I detest the monsters. I enjoyed being a kid, but I don't like the whole parenthood bit. Anyway, I was appalled, and the first thing I said was 'no way.' But I could see that Eileen was a little disappointed, so I quickly added, 'Oh, sure, it's okay.'
“Eileen wasn't going to send the invitation at first, but I coaxed her into it because I knew she wanted it. It made me a little jealous. I think that's part of the trouble. I'm really an awfully possessive bitch. I just want Eileen
