Jan

Robyn took up station next to the table.

As we ate, I notice that they all took turns responding to my requests: when I asked for another bagel, Sandra selected one for me and put cream cheese on it – Robyn got up and brought it to me; when I asked for the coffee, Candice got up to get it, pouring it for me. When I asked for some orange juice, Jan poured and Susan handed it to me. Kelly made it her job to clean up any stray bits of cream cheese that escaped onto my skin.

When I'd finished eating, I leaned back and put my arms on the back of the couch, my hands resting on Kelly and Susan's shoulders, saying 'You know, I could get used to this kind of treatment!' – and having Kelly say 'Too bad you won't get the chance!', to their laughter.

After we'd all finished, and during one of the commercials, they all got up and started carrying things into the kitchen, taking their time and making more trips with less to carry. When I started to get up to help, Kelly eased me back down, saying 'Just stay here. I think somebody wants to talk to you while the rest of us are in the kitchen, cleaning up.'

I looked at her inquisitively, but she just ignored it, and went on with what she'd started to do. All of them disappeared into the kitchen, except for Candice, who came over to sit on the couch with me.

Turning herself a little, so that she was facing me, she pulled her leg up to rest it on the cushion as she put her arm on the back of the couch.

I mirrored her, and then waited for her to say what was on her mind.

After looking at me for a few seconds, she finally spoke.

'I heard a lot lost night, about you, about Jan and Kelly, and even Sandra and Robyn. It got me thinking about stuff. A lot of stuff – like what kind of person I want to be, and the wonderful changes that I've seen in Kelly, and even Jan. I watched how you talk to all of us, and how you behave around us, and all the things that you've done with us, and for us. When I went to bed last night, Susan woke up – even though I was being real quiet – and wanted to talk with me for a while. She told me a little bit about what she had been feeling and thinking before she talked to you, and how she felt better afterwards.'

I nodded for her to continue.

'When I got here yesterday, I was still kind of nervous to be around you. It's not that I thought you would do anything to me, or say anything to me, or anything like that. It was just that you and Jan and Kelly are so relaxed around each other, and you're all so willing to open up to people that it was kind of scary. I mean, MY family isn't like that, at all. We love each other and all that; it's just that we don't talk and joke around and everything like you three do. After being here this morning, I kinda wish we did, but I know it won't be like that – we'll still have fun with each other, just not like you do.'

I nodded again, and she went on'When you and Jan and Kelly were joking this morning about making breakfast, it really surprised me at first, and I thought you were all serious. But after a bit, I realized that you*were* just joking, and made me think. I realized you were teasing them by acting like that – and that you wouldn't act like that unless you knew that they wouldn't take you seriously. And that they only way you could know that is if you really, truly knew THEM, and they knew you, and would know that you were teasing them. I really finally understood just how much you all love and trust each other that you could joke around that way. Then I thought about the way that Jan and Robyn teased you and Susan – I could see the change in her; she's never been that happy and relaxed, that I've seen. And I thought about the way that all of us were kidding with you and teasing you, and how you were giving back as good as you got. I realized that I had never seen any of us doing that before at any of our houses – never mind with all of us naked; and a guy there, too! Then when I brought you the bagel, you joked around with me, and even teased me a little bit about being – what was it? – a 'comely serving wench', like I wasn't any different than the others.'

I smiled, and told her 'You aren't, near as I can tell.'

'See, that's what I mean. You've made love with all of us except Susan and me. Before we brought out breakfast, Susan told us all about how she felt when she kissed you that last time; she told me that she felt so close to you that it was almost as though she had made love with you, even though it was only a kiss. So it was kind of strange for me, knowing that all of them felt that close to you, when I brought you that bagel. But you still joked with me like you did with them; and it made me feel really good inside, and made me understand something about you.'

'What's that?'

'That you really don't care whether you've made love with us, or not – that you really do still love us and care about us, anyway. I *know* that you'll treat me the same way, whether I want to make love with you, or not, and that you'll still care about me and love me.'

'Of course I would, Candice.', I responded, mildly surprised.

'Well, I wanted to ask you if you could, uh, make love with me – but without actually, um, being inside me, you know? I know that you love me and care about me, and I feel the same way about you as the others – well, mostly, anyway. I mean, I feel the same things about you, but probably just not as much. From what all the others have said, I know I can trust you not to do that part of it, but I still want to find out what the rest of it is like – if you'll help me learn. I want to learn what it's like to be that close to someone, and share myself with them, and them, me.'

I looked at her intently, and asked 'Are you sure, Candice?'

She looked back at me, with confidence, and in a steady voice answered 'Yes, I'm sure. I don't think I've been more sure of anything in my life!'

'In that case, then, yes, I'll do it.', I responded.

'Uh, could we do it today? I don't mean right now, 'cause I still want to be with the rest of them before they have to go home today, but later? Maybe this afternoon?'

'Whenever you want, Candice. There's no hurry – but you probably know that, already.'

She smiled, and said 'Yeah, I do. But it's still nice to hear it from you.'

We sat there for a few moments, looking at each other before she kind of shook herself, and said 'Well, I'd better get in there and help clean things up.' before gracing me with another smile. and standing up.

A few moments after she got into the kitchen, I thought I heard a flurry of whispering, but couldn't be sure. Following that, there were the occasional noises of things being put away and the dishwasher being loaded.

A few minutes later, the group of them trooped back into the den. Susan didn't hesitate to sit down next to me, as did Candice. The others distributed themselves around the room. I turned the TV off at Kelly's request, and we spent the rest of the morning in quiet conversation. I say 'we', but it was mostly them, with only occasional input or observations from me when I was directly spoken to. As the time passed, Susan and Candice each snuggled closer, pulling an arm around themselves, and even holding my hand on a breast. None of the others seemed to take the slightest notice, seeming to accept it as the right of anyone next to me to have my touch.

By lunch time, they'd pretty much talked themselves out, and were happy to simply sit and enjoy each other's company and friendship. As two o'clock approached, it was Susan who finally pointed out that she still needed to get home – accompanied by a number of small groans of complaint. None the less, she got up, saying that her dad would be coming to get her, and had to get dressed. She went into the bedroom, and when she came out, was dressed in the clothes she'd brought, and had her small bag loaded with the clothing she'd worn when she got there.

That seemed to prod Sandra and Robyn, as well, who asked if Susan's dad could drop them off, too. Susan agreed, and the two of them went off to dress, as well. While they were gone, I asked Susan to give her father a message – 'Just tell him that what he was worried about turned out not to be a problem.'; she assured me that she'd pass it along. When Sandra and Robyn got back, all of them started talking again, making plans for some event or other, until Mabel announced that there was someone at the door. The TV revealed it to be Susan's dad, and the three of them headed for the door. We heard the brief conversation as Susan asked her dad to give Robyn and Sandra rides, and he said he would, before we heard the door close.

That left just the four of us there, before Jan reminded Kelly that they had a report to write for one of their classes, and suggested that they go to the library to research it. Kelly agreed, and told Candice she was welcome to join them, or stay with me, whichever she wanted. Candice blushed ever so slightly, and said she'd stay, if they didn't mind. Both assured her it was fine, and went back to get dressed.

A few minutes later, we heard them chatting as they came out and headed for the garage. Moments later, we heard the faint sounds of a car starting, then driving off.

Finally completely alone, Candice and I sat there on the couch, snuggling a few minutes before she finally sat