Nietzsche would take up this call. He considered hope our greatest
scourge and pilloried Plato, Socrates, and Christianity for focusing
our attention away from the only life that we have and toward
some future illusory world.
36
_________________________
Where are there
any real
monogamists? We
all live for a
time and, most
of us, always,
in polygamy.
And since every
man needs many
women, there is
nothing fairer
than to make it
incumbent upon
him to provide
for many women.
This will
reduce woman to
her true and
natural
position as a
subordinate
being.
_________________________
Pam opened the next meeting. «I`ve got something to announce
today.»
All heads turned toward her.
«Today is confession time. Go ahead, Tony.»
Tony bolted upright, stared at Pam for a long moment, then
leaned back in his chair, crossed his arms, and closed his eyes. If
he had been wearing a fedora, he would have pushed it down over
his face.
Pam, surmising that Tony had no intention of commenting,
continued in her clear bold voice, «Tony and I have been sexually
involved for a while, and it`s hard for me to keep coming here and
be silent about it.»
After a short charged silence came stuttered questions:
«Why?» «What started this?» «How long?» «How could you?»
«Where is it going?»
Quickly, coolly, Pam responded, «It`s been going on for
several weeks. I don`t know about the future, don`t know what
started it; it wasn`t premeditated but just happened one evening
after a meeting.»
«You going to join us today, Tony?» Rebecca asked gently.
Tony slowly opened his eyes. «It`s all news to me.»
«News? You saying that this is not true?»
«No. I mean confession day. This вЂ?go ahead, Tony`—
thatwas news to me.»
«You don`t look happy about it,” said Stuart.
Tony turned to address Pam: «I mean, I was over at your
place last night. Being intimate, you know. Intimacy—how many
time have I heard here that broads are more sensitive and want
more intimacy than plain old sexual intimacy? So why not be
intimate enough to talk to me, to run this �confession day` by me
first?»
«Sorry,” Pam said, without sounding sorry, «things weren`t
sitting right with me. After you left I was up much of the night
brooding and thinking about the group, and I realized time was too
short—we`ve got only six more meeting left. Am I counting right,
Julius?»
«Right. Six more meetings.»
«Well, it just hit me how much I was betraying you, Julius.
And my contract here with everyone else. And betraying myself,
too.»
«I never put it all together,” said Bonnie, «but I`ve had a
feeling that something wasn`t right the last several meetings.
You`ve been different, Pam. I remember Rebecca sensing that
more than once. You rarely talk about your own issues—I have no
idea what`s going on between you and John or whether your ex–husband`s in the picture or not. Mostly what you`ve been doing is
attacking Philip.»
«And Tony, you too,” added Gill. «Now that I think about it,
you`ve been real different. You`ve been hiding out. I`ve missed the
old free–swinging Tony.»
«I`ve got some thoughts here,” said Julius. «First, something
Pam touched off with her use of the wordcontract. I know this is
repetitious, but it bears repeating for any of you who may be in a
group in the future»—Julius glanced at Philip—«or even lead a
group. Theonly contract any of us have is to do our best to explore
our relationship with everyone in the group. The danger of an out–of–group relationship is thatit jeopardizes the therapy work. How
does it do that?Because people in a tight relationship will often
value that relationship more than the therapy work. Look, it`s
precisely what`s happened here: not only have Pam and Tony
hidden their own relationship—that`s understandable—but as a
result of their personal involvement they`ve backed off from their
therapy work here.»
«Until today,” said Pam.
«Absolutely, until today—and I applaud what you`ve done,
and applaud your decision to bring it to the group. You know what
