Jackie smiled and laughed a little. “I thought one of us ridin’ you was enough.”
“You know, you and I never really did get to finish our conversation.”
“What? About me loving you?”
“Yeah, Jackie. About that.”
“Like I said, I’m cool. That’s just something that I have to deal with.”
“No Jackie, when you dropped it on me, it became something we both have to deal with.”
“Yeah, you’re right. It was kinda fucked up for me to drop my little bit of baggage on you.”
“Hey, that’s what friends are for. But I don’t get it. I mean, I love you, Jackie, but like a friend. I love you the way I love Ronnie. You know what I’m sayin’?”
“I love you like that, too, but there’s something more, that’s all. Like I said, you’ve always been my man. It didn’t matter what I was doin’ or what you were doin’, or what we done with each other.”
At the mention of their past sexual involvement, Travis said, “I was wondering if that was it.”
“I don’t know, Travis. I’m still trying to sort all this out in my mind. You know, at the time I thought I was just caught up in the moment.”
“Me too.
“What was her name anyway?”
“Which one?” Travis asked.
“The first one.”
“Oh shit. What was her name? She was your friend. You should remember her name.”
“I know. Ain’t that terrible? Too much weed making my memory bad,” Jackie said. “It was my sophomore year at Rutgers and you had come down for the weekend.”
“To go to some party with you. I remember. What was her name?” He paused, then it came to him. “Sharee French.”
“That’s her. She was mad as hell with me after that. She was so into me it wasn’t even funny. I was glad to get rid of her, ’cause after that she started trippin’,” Jackie recalled.
“I guess so. We were supposed to be sharing her, not the two of you sharing me.”
Jackie smiled.
“I was shocked when you got on top of me and started ridin’. I know Sharee was. What happened that day?”
“I don’t know, Travis. I guess I just wanted to. I wanted to feel you inside me. And every time after that, I’d always want to feel you inside me. You’re the only man I ever had.”
“You and I have shared so many women,” Travis said. Then it hit him. “Wait a minute. Didn’t you and Ronnie, before me and you?”
“Not exactly.”
“What does that mean, Jackie?”
“Well, we did and we didn’t.”
“What does that mean?”
“You have to promise not to tell Ronnie I told you.”
“I ain’t gonna say nothin’. What happened?”
“Promise you won’t laugh.” Jackie paused. “We never really did it. I mean, we kissed and he felt on me, but Ronnie came on me while he was trying to get it in me.”
Travis started laughing.
“You said you wouldn’t laugh.”
“No, I said I wouldn’t tell him you told me. That shit is funny, ’cause it never stopped him from bragging about it for years. And you let him do it. Didn’t say shit.”
“I wouldn’t do that, bust him down like that. Not in front of you, anyway. You were my first, Travis. The only man I’ve ever had inside me. Only man I’ve ever wanted inside me, and I guess I’m a little emotional about it, that’s all.”
“If that’s how you felt, then how come the only time we’ve done it is with another woman? Never just you and me. Why is that?”
“That’s the only time I felt like it. Look, Travis, the whole thing is still kind of confusing to me. But like I said, I’m cool with it.”
“Well, as long as you’re cool with it, I am too,” he said. “We got a big day tomorrow, so I’m gonna go and get some sleep.”
“Okay,” Jackie said and stood up. She walked into Travis’s bedroom and got a big shirt out of the dresser then began to get undressed.
Travis came into his room slowly, looking a bit confused to see Jackie standing there naked. “Don’t look so worried, Travis. I just don’t feel like driving home just to come back in the morning,” she said. She put on the big shirt and got under the covers.
“Okay,” Travis said. “But I sleep naked.”
“What’s your point? I’ve seen you naked before.”
Travis got undressed and joined Jackie between the sheets. She snuggled up close to Travis and put her head on his chest. Travis put his arm around her. “This is gonna be my last job, Jackie.”
“Because of her?”
“No, not because of her. I’ve had this on my mind for a long time. But I’d be lying if I said that she isn’t a part of it. I never wanted to make a career out of this.”
“Either did I, but what else we gonna do?”
“Come on, Jackie. You make it sound like none of us got skills.”
“Like what?”
“Like what? What else can you do, is that what you’re asking me?”
“Yeah, Travis, that’s exactly what I’m asking you. What the hell else have we got to do?”
“For the last couple of months, you’ve been doin’ all right modeling. What about that?”
“That’s just pocket money, Travis.”
“You’re a chemist and a damn good one. That was all you’ve ever really wanted to be.”
“You’re right. That’s what I wanted to be from when we were kids.”
“Have you gotten so far away from it that you can’t see it anymore? I hope not.”
“No, I haven’t.”
“You can still get back into it. With the money you got, you could go back to school and get your masters or a PhD. Jackie, there is so much more that you-shit, all of us could be doing.”
“I know what you’re trying to say, Travis, and you’re right. I guess what I’m asking is what else can we do to bring in the kind of money that we can doing our thing?”
Travis looked at Jackie without an answer for a second or two before he said, “Nothing. But that doesn’t mean that we don’t have any choices.”
“All that is easy for you to say, Travis. You stuck with your plan and banked that money, bought property, shit like that. All my reserves are just about gone. I need this to make it,” Jackie said, knowing that the reason she had drained her reserves was her gambling habit.
“No, Jackie, you don’t. You can make it another way. And you’re right; I do have bank, so whatever you decide to do, I got your back. And you know this.”
There was silence in the room after that, and it wasn’t long before Travis drifted off to sleep. For Jackie, it wasn’t that easy. She knew that as long as she kept gambling, she would have to keep robbing.
When Ronnie arrived at Travis’s house the following morning, he found them seated at the table eating breakfast and drinking coffee. “Hope y’all saved some food for me.”
“Of course we did, Ronnie,” Jackie said.
When it came time to leave for the job, they gathered their equipment and left the house. As they were about to get in the car, Travis saw Me’shelle’s car coming down the street. “I’ll be right back,” he said then walked away.
“We don’t have time for this now, Travis. We got to go,” Ronnie yelled.
“I’ll be right with you.”
Me’shelle parked in front of the house and got out. She came around the car and stepped to Travis.
