Perfetti anywhere — even her car was gone. Alarm changed to understanding when I found a note on the fridge saying she’d gone to church like she did every Sunday. Alyce stopped going a few years ago, although I’d never known the reason why. I’d just been glad because it meant Alyce could spend more time with me.
Only now it wasn’t Alyce I was thinking of … and when I heard a musical tone coming from my phone, I couldn’t check the text message fast enough.
I wanted so badly to call him back … to hear his voice and tell him how much I missed him and longed to see him … but I didn’t. Because I had to think this through, figure out how much I could tell him. Considering that Eli didn’t even know that Gabe had found me and we’d been meeting in secret, the whole wanting-to-kill-my-beau thing would be hard to believe. And Eli might consider it a betrayal, too.
Still, he deserved to be warned — even if he’d hate me and our relationship would be over before we’d shared a real first kiss. So, steeling my heart against breakage, I picked up the phone. Only I’d delayed too long. My call went straight to voicemail.
Anxious and frustrated, I couldn’t do anything now except wait for him to call back. So I kept busy doing random stuff like cleaning the room and flipping through Alyce’s photo books, feeling sad whenever I saw pictures of us together. There was an entire album of the theme baskets she’d created for the Halsey Hospitality Club, and underneath each basket was the name of the new student who received this “Hello Halsey” gift. She never personally handed out the baskets — that was my job, because she couldn’t stand gushy emotional scenes — but I could feel her pride over her artistic work in each photo. And I felt something inside me soften, letting me know it wasn’t only about the art. She cared about helping people more than she’d ever admit.
Sighing, I put the albums away and searched the room again, checking drawers, shelves, and even under furniture for any clues, but finding nothing new. There was so much I didn’t know and little time left to find answers. At least I’d be able to get into Alyce’s locker tomorrow at school.
A familiar yet foreign word, from a language I’d spoken in a past life. Thinking about walking the halls, going to classes, and facing people with my borrowed face freaked me out. Talking, walking, looking like Alyce … who always wore lots of black, which was so not me. I shared a few classes with Alyce and knew her schedule, so I wouldn’t get lost. Still, I’d be my own best friend and my grandmother would be me.
I should have taken Grammy up on her offer to switch back early.
Sorting through Alyce’s closet — seeing so many familiar shirts, jackets, boots, and skirts — made me feel like she was here with me. I could quit now and she’d return. Only what would she return to? A depressed mother, a grave that was still lost, and a best friend who might be a Dark Lifer.
I now had less than forty-eight hours to find a way out of this crisis.
Or tomorrow would be my last day.
Alive.
* * *
Mrs. Perfetti returned from church acting almost normal. I was getting used to her mood swings, and noticed the way her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes. She didn’t say much, as if socializing had drained her. She asked me to make her some tea, then wearily sank down on the couch. She expected me to fuss over her, rather than the other way around like most mothers. So while she watched TV, I made linner — Alyce’s word for a late lunch/early dinner.
Rather than place a cooking SOS call to Dustin, I made the only thing I could think of: stuffed French toast. Cream cheese and blackberry jam slapped between two slices of battered bread, grilled, then served up with whipped cream on top. High in calories but even higher in delicious-factor, and for a while I was able to forget my problems.
Eli called while I was washing dishes.
“I’m back!” he exclaimed in happy exhaustion.
And it was so good to hear his voice — soft, sweet, buttery warm. I thought of his smiling face, his tender blue eyes, his soft lips … until I remembered Gabe’s threat and snapped back to harsh reality.
“Eli, I need to see you right away,” I said before I lost my nerve.
“I’ve needed to see you all week. Should I come there or will you come here?”
I glanced over at Mrs. Perfetti, who was back to lying on the couch and staring zombie-like at the TV. I didn’t think Alyce would want me to leave her alone. “Come here,” I finally told him, then added, “Hurry.”
“Can’t wait to see me, huh?” he asked, teasingly.
“More than that — there’s something I have to tell you.”
“So tell me now.”
“I–I want to … and I will when you get here. It’s just better in person.”
“What about Alyce’s mother? Will she let me in the house?”
“She’s the least of my worries. Just get here.”
“Sure. I’m really beat after driving seven hours and am practically falling asleep on my feet.” He yawned. “I got some things to do before I can see you.”
“Soon?” I persisted.
“Within an hour,” he promised.
I hung up, feeling better for the first time all day.
* * *
I finished filling the dishwasher then turned it on, all the while checking the clock, counting the minutes and preparing how to dump my horrible news on Eli. How could I explain about meeting with Gabe despite knowing Dark Lifers were bad news? I couldn’t — not without admitting how Gabe had made me feel and how much I’d enjoyed our secret rendezvous. Thinking back now, I ached with shame as if I’d cheated on Eli.
And in a way, I had.
Eli was going to be so pissed.
Maybe hurt, too.
While I waited, I rehearsed what I was going to say, hoping he’d understand.
But an hour passed, then another. Mrs. Perfetti turned off the TV and went to bed. I waited by the window, hand poised on the curtain to check the streets, but no sign of Eli. When I tried his phone, it went straight to voicemail. After checking the phone book, I dialed his house. His brother Chad answered and I almost dropped the phone, flashing back to kissing him when I’d been in a different body. But that was two body switches ago and he didn’t even know Alyce.
“Is Eli there?” I asked cautiously.
“He’s sleeping,” Chad said.
“Sleeping! But he promised to come right over.”
“Eli’s a big star now — lots of girls have been calling him.”
“They have?” I had the absurd impulse to smash the phone.
“Well, sure. Didn’t you hear he made it to fourth on the
“I heard,” I said dryly.
“Eli hasn’t had time to go through his messages or gifts — can you believe girls send him gifts? I’ve won some impressive golf tournaments but girls never gave me the rock star treatment.” He laughed in that charming yet egotistical way I’d once crushed on. “Anyway, Eli was so beat from driving all day, he fell asleep. I can wake him if it’s important.”
I was feeling less than important, more like abandoned, but I wasn’t about to admit this to Chad. “That’s okay,” I said. “It can wait.”
