ever.
While sitting at home one morning I was unexpectedly called on to attend a gentleman who had been deputed by a civic committee to engage me for a public dinner which was to be held the following day about three miles from town; the entertainment upon this occasion was to be followed by a ball, to which the wives and daughters of the jovial citizens were invited.
Having agreed as to terms, etc., he politely informed me that if I had any friends who would like to join me in the evening he had a few tickets of admission which were entirely at my service. I availed myself of this kind offer and he presented me with admission for three persons.
In order to prevent suspicion, I presented two to the husband of the fair Emma, with an intimation that if not better engaged I should be happy to join their party; the other I reserved for Bessy, and it was ultimately agreed, in consequence of my attendance being required several hours before the time specified on the cards for the admission of the ladies, and as Mr. S., the husband of Emma, could not leave his business before eight o'clock, that the two females should start together at six, Mr. S. could wait at home the arrival of E., acquaint him with the invitation each of them had received, and should he feel an inclination to accompany Mr. S. I would, upon being sent for, endeavour to obtain an additional admittance for him.
Shortly after seven o'clock the ladies arrived, and having performed my professional duties I had the pleasure of escorting them through the beautiful gardens with which the place abounded; whispering soft compliments into the willing ears of each alternately, while each, believing herself the sole object of my secret adoration, returned the stolen pressure of my hand, and occasionally a small but thickset grove of trees would cause our arms to separate, affording me a hasty opportunity of pressing the pliant lips of one, unseen by the other; such, indeed, was the peculiar nature of my feelings that I was more than once tempted to exclaim, in the language of Macheath, How happy could I be with either, Were t'other dear charmer away.
About eight, the preparations for dancing being completed, the ball commenced; but finding that my fair companions preferred the refreshing breeze of the gardens to the sultry and oppressive heat of a crowded ballroom, I, being no very ardent admirer of the dance, cheerfully complied with their request to quit the room; and as night's sable veil rendered surrounding objects more obscure I had various opportunities of indulging in little pleasing, though perhaps not altogether delicate liberties, which, together with the exhilarating influence of the bumpers I had previously taken, filled my soul with the most tantalizing ideas.
Nor were the ladies by any means in too severely chaste a mood, as will be understood when the reader learns that, as we sat on a rustic bench, the fingers of Bessie's right hand were moving amorously upon the lower part of my weapon whilst at one and the same moment Emma's red mouth was engaged upon the nut. But the risk of a collision was too great and, whispering to Bessy that I could endure her caressing touch no longer, I removed her fingers and, tucking them under my arm, placed my left hand upon Emma's head and pushed it gently downwards until such time as her pliant tongue and rosy lips had brought about the natural result of their exquisitely lascivious operations.
After enjoying the varied beauties of nature for upwards of an hour in the most retired walks, the time having arrived when we expected Mr.
S., we thought it prudent to seek the more frequented parts of the gardens, and a few moments later saw him advancing towards us.
He soon gave us to understand that but little comfort might be expected for the remainder of the evening, as E. was then waiting without in the very worst of tempers, being sorely displeased at his wife's having dared to venture upon visiting a place of public amusement without having previously obtained his permission.
Having whispered Bessy not to feel the least alarm at his discontent and assuring her that should anything unpleasant occur in consequence of her having accepted my invitation, I would immediately take her under my protection. I certainly felt myself most agreeably flattered, as pressing my hand she answered in an equally gentle tone, 'Oh, my love! if you really are sincere, how much rather would I incur his anger than endure his smile!'
Giving her in charge of Mr. S., I proceeded to procure an admission for the growling bear, her husband; who, notwithstanding a vain attempt at a cheerful bearing, was evidently endeavouring to hide his chagrin under a flimsy mask of deceitful smiles.
However, while I pretended to perceive nothing particular in his manner, I welcomed him most cordially; and having succeeded without difficulty in obtaining a pass for him we joined the ladies, and Mr. S. immediately resigned Mrs. E. to her fond and gentle husband's kind protection. The loving couple fell behind, and Emma offering me her vacant arm, we continued our rambles through the gardens, followed at some distance by Mr. and Mrs. E.
Knowing the disposition of the man so well, I had no doubt but that he kept in the rear for the purpose of annoying his wife by destroying what little pleasure she might otherwise have enjoyed; while the better to impose upon us, as we occasionally turned to see if they were still following, he assumed a look of cheerfulness, but which sat so badly on his ill-favoured countenance that it could be easily detected by the most inexperienced observer. My suspicions were shortly confirmed, for now, in an increased tone of voice, we heard the lady exclaim, 'This is the way in which you always treat me; and let the consequences be what they may, I will not walk with you a moment longer.'
Without waiting for his reply she broke from his arm, and running with the fleetness of an alarmed fawn when pursued by the hunters, she rejoined our little party; in a moment her husband came up to us, when S. and his wife endeavoured to restore amity between them, but in vain; the fact is that her little heart was bursting with jealousy at witnessing the commonplace attentions courtesy compelled me to pay Mrs. S., and she had secretly determined, at all hazards, not to quit my side again that evening; so when with a coaxing look he again offered her his arm, she threw it from her with an angry look of ineffable disdain, and turning to me said, 'Perhaps, Mr. -, you will have the kindness to escort me home?'
I at first appeared to hesitate, and even solicited her to be reconciled to her husband, adding that no doubt it was all owing to some trifling misunderstanding, to which she replied, 'No matter, sir, since you refuse my request I will walk home alone-'tis not the first time by many.'
She was turning away with that intention when, taking her arm and placing it in mine, I advanced towards E., saying jocosely, 'Well, Mr. E., you see how matters stand, and as I should be sorry to incur a charge of want of gallantry, I certainly feel myself bound to obey a lady's command. Say, have I your consent?'
'Oh, with all my heart,' answered he. 'I suppose she must have her own way.'
He then, endeavouring to assume a look of indifference, took the vacant arm of Mrs. S., leaving me in undisputed possession of Bessy for the remainder of the evening; who, regardless of the threatening glances her husband occasionally cast upon her, seemed determined to make up for her previous mortification and allow nothing to ruffle her spirits; she chatted and laughed incessantly and, encouraged no doubt by the promise I had made previous to E.'s arrival, gave free vent to her naturally lively disposition; and, as we sometimes lost sight of our companions amid the leafy gloom of the surrounding foliage, would express the delightful sensations of her soul by pressing fervent kisses on my lips; and, inspired by the influence of a few glasses of wine which I had prevailed on her to take during the evening, she whispered, as I clasped her in my arms and fingered the nipples of her swelling breasts, 'Oh, for ten minutes alone together, to have you between my legs just once! Give me your hand, beloved, feel how it pouts for you!
Oh, for a touch of your tongue, or even one thrust from this dear thing which throbs under my hand! Slip your tongue into my mouth-all of it-and leave it there, against mine. So!'
A long and delicious kiss ensued, after which we were obliged, in order to avoid suspicion, to slacken our pace, and as our friends approached turned to meet them, when E. sullenly demanded if we 'had not better think of going home?' to which, as it was now near one o'clock, we instantly assented, and accordingly left the gardens. I proposed a coach, as we were upwards of three miles from home, but this Mr. E. would by no means agree to.
'What,' he exclaimed, 'could make you think of going out pleasuring, if your feet are so d-d tender that you cannot walk home?' (These words being of course addressed to his wife.) 'I don't get my money so easy as some folks'-(here he had a rap at me)-'and can't afford to spend it in such foolish luxuries.'
In vain I remonstrated that the expense should be all my own, that I preferred riding and as I had already requested the waiter to procure a coach the ladies might just as well partake of the convenience; besides, the charge would be precisely the same to me for riding alone as if they all accompanied me; to this he answered, 'I say, let her walk; it's a fine night, or rather morning, and the distance a mere nothing; and it is setting her a bad
