Now she looked directly at Neci. ?Deny it.?
?Why should I? They would be better off without them?more Human!?
?Just as much better off as you would be without your eyes! Let?s go look for them, Macy. I hope to god they never heard the things Neci?s been saying.?
Amazed, Akin followed her out. She had put the blame for the girls? flight exactly where it belonged without involving him at all. She left him with a salvager who had injured his knee and joined the search as though she had every expectation of finding the girls quickly.
19
Amma and Shkaht were not found. They were simply gone?perhaps found by other resisters, perhaps safe in some trade village. Most of the resisters seemed to think they were dead?eaten by caimans or anacondas, bitten by poisonous snakes or insects. The idea that such young children could find their way to safety seemed completely impossible to them.
And most of the resisters blamed Neci. Tate seemed to find that satisfying. Akin did not care. If Neci left him alone, he was content with her. And she did leave him alone?but only after planting the idea that he must be watched more carefully. She was not the only one who believed this, but she was the only one to suggest that he be kept out of the pit, kept away from the river, be harnessed and tied outside the cabins when everyone was too busy to watch him.
He would not have stood for that. He would have stung the rope or chain that they tied him with until it rotted or corroded through, and he would have run away?up the mountain, not down. They might not find him higher up. He would probably not make it back to Lo. He was too far from it now, and there were so many resister villages between it and him that he would probably be picked up once he headed down from the hills. But he would not stay with people who tied him.
He was not tied. He was watched more closely than before, but it seemed the resisters had as great an aversion to tying or confining people as he did.
Neci finally left with a group of salvagers going home?men and women carrying wealth on their backs. They took two of the guns with them. There had been a general agreement among new salvagers and old that Phoenix would begin to manufacture guns. Tate was against it. Yori was so strongly against it that she threatened to move to another resister village. Nevertheless, guns would be made.
?We?ve got to protect ourselves,? Gabe said. ?Too many of the raiders have guns now, and Phoenix is too rich. Sooner or later, they?ll realize it?s easier to steal from us than carry on honest trade.?
Tate slept several nights alone or with Akin once the decision was made. Sometimes she hardly slept at all, and Akin wished he could comfort her the way Amma and Shkaht had comforted him. Sleep could be a great gift. But he could have given it only with the help of a close Oankali-born sibling.
?Would raiders begin raiding you the way they raid us?? he asked her one night as they lay together in a hammock.
?Probably.?
?Why haven?t they already??
?They have occasionally?trying to steal metal or women. But Phoenix is a strong town?plenty of people willing to fight if they have to. There are smaller, weaker settlements that are easier pickings.?
?Are guns really a bad idea, then??
In the dark she tried to stare at him. She couldn?t have seen him?although he saw her clearly. ?What do you think?? she asked.
?I don?t know. I like a lot of the people in Phoenix. And I remember what raiders did to Tino. They didn?t have to. They just did it. Later, though, while I was with them, they didn?t really seem
I don?t know. Most of the time, they were like the men in Phoenix.?
?They probably came from someplace like Phoenix?some village or town. They got sick of one pointless, endless existence and chose another.?
?Pointless because resisters can?t have children??
?That?s it. It means a lot more than I could ever explain to you. We don?t get old. We don?t have kids, and nothing we do means shit.?
?What would it mean
if you had a kid like me??
?We have got a kid like you. You.?
?You know what I mean.?
?Go to sleep, Akin.?
?Why are you afraid of guns??
?They make killing too easy. Too impersonal. You know what that means??
?Yes. I?ll ask if you say something I don?t understand.?
?So we?ll kill more of each other than we already do. We?ll learn to make better and better guns. Someday, we?ll take on the Oankali, and that will be the end of us.?
?It would. What do you want to happen instead??
Silence.
?Do you know??
?Not extinction,? she whispered. ?Not extinction in any form. As long as we?re alive, we have some chance.?
