Seduced

of her mind taunted. Before she could stop herself, a painful sigh unraveled out of her,

Brooke tipped her head, regarding her with concern. 'Hey, are you okay?'

'Sure. I'm great.' Her voice vibrated with false lightness, and she added a quick smile as backup. 'Why?'

'You just seem, well, upset about something.' Brooke took another bite of the dessert, and seemed to contemplate Jessica's mood. 'Did you and Ryan have an argument?'

Oh, yeah, a huge, life-altering one,

'I mean, you must have had to spend some time together while planning this surprise party,' Brooke went on while finishing her cake. 'And I know how the two of you are around each other. The air fairly crackles with tension when you're together. But now it seems like you're avoiding each other.'

'Don't we always?' she quipped.

'Not like this, Jess. You'redeliberately avoiding each other, and despite your lawyer jokes and Ryan's teasing, that's never kept the two of youapart when you're in the same room.' She set her plate aside. 'Is something going on between the two of you?'

She wanted so badly to confide in her sister, but her emotions were in such turmoil, she didn't know where to begin, or what to say.

And then she lost the opportunity as theping, ping, ping of silver against crystal captured everyone's attention. The guests grew quiet, and all eyes turned to Ryan, who stood in the middle of the living room with a glass of champagne in his hand.

He smiled, but his eyes lacked their normal sparkle. 'It's ten minutes tomidnight, and before we bring in the new year, I'd like for everyone to grab a drink so I can make a toast to Marc and Brooke.'

It took nearly five minutes for family and friends to grab their choice of drink and settle back into the room. Once everyone was present, and Marc and Brooke were situated next to Ryan to receive his best-man speech, he cleared his throat and began.

'I've known Marc for quite a few years now, and I always thought he'd remain a bachelor forever, or at least that was his plan.' Chuckles rippled through the small audience before Ryan continued. 'When Marc fell in love with Brooke, I knew that she had to be a really special woman, one with a giving heart and the capacity to accept Marc for who and what he was. I knew she'd be the kind of woman who'd be his best friend through trials and triumphs. It is said that no man is complete until he finds the right woman to marry, and it's clear that Brooke has made Marc's life complete. Every man should be so fortunate.'

Jessica stood behind Brooke and Marc, and belatedly realized her mistake in positioning herself so close to the bride and groom when Ryan's gaze subtly shifted to her. A frisson of awareness shot through her, and her insides began to tremble.

He didn't look away, and she couldn't either. 'I've only been in love once, but I understand how powerful that emotion can be. I also know that there are times when love can be painful and trying, so I'd like to say a few things for you to keep in mind for the years ahead. Love without fear. Trust without questioning. Accept without change, and desire each other without inhibitions. Always believe in one another, and always have faith.' He raised his flute of champagne to the happy couple, and everyone followed his lead. 'Here's to love and laughter, and your happily ever after.'

'Hear, hear,' the guests echoed jovially, and Jessica was hardly aware of someone next to her clinking their glass against hers as she watched Marc kiss her sister with the kind of the love and tenderness Ryan had shown her.

Emotions clamored in her chest, her mind spun, and she struggled to keep herself grounded. Tears tightened her throat and burned the back of her eyes. Though Ryan's toast was for Brooke and Marc, the profound words beckoned to her, and made her realize what she'd never, ever have in her life-love, laughter, and her own happily ever after.

'Hey, everybody,' someone in the room called out. 'It's the countdown tomidnight!'

The guests began counting down from ten, until finally the old year rolled into the new one and everyone cheered, hugged, and wished one another a happy new year.

Unable to participate in the ritual when she had absolutely nothing to celebrate, Jessica slipped from the room as inconspicuously as possible, taking her heartache with her.

* * *

Brooke found her in the downstairs study minutes later. Jessica barely had time to swipe the tears from her cheeks before her sister laid into her.

'Iknew something was going on between you and Ryan. He might have made that toast to Marc and me, but he was looking atyou, Jessica.' Brooke crossed her arms over her chest, exerting her big-sister presence. 'Out with it,' she demanded.

Jessica didn't bother to pretend she didn't know what Brooke was referring to. This time, she let the floodgates open and told her sister about the past month with Ryan, how she'd seen such a different side to him than she'd always believed, how she'd fallen in love with him, and ultimately, how she doubted her ability to trust in him because of her fears.

Brooke grabbed her hands and gave them a gentle squeeze. 'Ah, Jess, sometimes following your heart is one of the most difficult things you'll ever do.'

'But what if-'

Brooke shook her head, cutting off her sister's argument. 'There are no 'what ifs' when you're in love. It just is. And despite what you might believe, not every man is like Dad.'

'You know,' she breathed, not at all surprised that her sister understood her so well.

'Yeah, I know that his leaving devastated you and made you feel insecure about so many things. I know our life was tough, but we made it just fine, Jess.' Brooke smiled, and brushed a stray strand of hair off her cheek.'You made it just fine. And I don't want to see you lose the best thing that has ever come into your life because you're afraid of trusting your true instincts.'

She moved away from her sister and glanced at the hardbound books tucked in an oak bookshelf, unable to relinquish deeper insecurities. 'What if I want more from Ryan than he can give me?'

'How do you know what he's capable of giving unless you give him a chance?' she countered.

And that meant trusting Ryan to put her first, and on those occasions when he couldn't because of the demands of his career, trusting herself to be strong enough to believe he'd always be there for her. To have faith that he'd find that balance.

'I don't think you'll ever forgive Dad for what he did to the family,' Brooke said softly from behind her. 'But don't let him sabotage your chance to be happy and possibly have a family of your own.'

With that, her sister left the room to return to the party, leaving Jessica to contemplate her past, the present, and the future. And as she let go of bitter, resentful memories, she discovered a fortitude she never realized she possessed. A strength born of love. And the courage to grasp the kind of happiness Brooke had found for herself.

The kind of happiness Jessica had denied herself for far too long.

It seemed like forever before everyone cleared out of Ryan's house and she was alone with him. She was exhausted, but determined to speak with him. And she was nervous. Oh, Lord, especially that. So much was at stake. So much was at risk. Her heart. Her body. Her soul.

The rest of her life.

He frowned when he saw her standing in the entryway all by herself, clearly not happy to find her still around. 'What are you still doing here?' he asked, his tone flat and emotionless. 'I thought you left when Brooke did.'

'No, I only walked them out.' Feeling her tenacity slip a serious notch, she blurted out her request before she lost her nerve. 'Ryan… I'd like to talk to you.'

He stared at her for a long, hard moment. 'After this morning, I don't think there's anything left to say.'

His reply startled her, rattling her composure and the carefully thought-out discussion she'd had planned. An awful sense of foreboding closed in on her like a vise around her chest. 'What about…'Us. She nearly wept as the one word got tangled around those damnable insecurities of hers.

He jammed his hands on his hips, his expression impatient. 'What about what?' he prompted gruffly.