'I'm sorry, Josh,' said Aisling as the taxi headed out of the airport through the tunnel. 'I think I might have blown our contract. Bryn was well on his way to convincing himself that the storm was all your fault, and he certainly won't forgive me for the things I said last night. I should have been more careful, but he made me so angry! And now I'm afraid that he'll veto any move to award us the contract now. He's got a lot of clout at C.B.C.'
'Don't worry about it yet,' said Josh. 'We'll just have to wait and see what they say.'
'I'll understand if you want me to leave the company now,' Aisling said miserably.
'Of course I don't want you to leave,' he said. 'You've been doing a great job. And you were right about going on this trip. I made a lot of other useful contacts this week, which I wouldn't have done if you hadn't encouraged me to go. Even if the major contract doesn't come through, I think it will have been worth it.'
Of course he didn't want Aisling to leave, thought Bella dully. Aisling could obviously do what she liked-dump him, humiliate him, jeopardise an important contract-and Josh would still want her to stay.
The taxi waited with its meter ticking outside Josh's flat while he and Aisling got out and unloaded their bags.
'Well…see you,' said Bella brightly.
'Yes.' Josh hesitated, as if he would have said more, but in the end he stepped back and closed the door. 'See you.'
As the taxi turned round, Bella watched him unlock the door to his flat and stand back to let Aisling go in first. He followed her in without even glancing back to where she sat all alone in the back of the taxi.
So that was that. The end of the holiday and back to reality with a vengeance.
The house was cold and empty when Bella let herself in. The taxi driver had taken pity on her and carried her case to the door, but with her bad foot it was a struggle even to get it inside on her own. She would have to unpack it at the bottom of the stairs as there was no way she would ever be able to carry it up to her bedroom.
Bella limped into the kitchen and put on as many lights as she could. She had always loved this house, but all at once it seemed sad and lonely, and much too big for one person. She wished Josh were with her. It wouldn't feel lonely then.
But Josh wasn't there. He was with Aisling. Bella slumped down at the table and put her head in her hands, torturing herself by imagining them together. Were they sitting on his battered blue sofa, happy just to be back together again? Perhaps Aisling was telling Josh how much she regretted going off with Bryn, and then Josh could pull her joyfully into his arms, telling her not to worry about it just as she wasn't to worry about losing them the contract. 'You've come back to me and that's all that matters,' he might be saying right now.
Bella buried her head in her arms and wept.
In spite of her tears, she was so tired that she fell straight into a deep sleep as soon as she dragged herself to bed. She woke late the next morning, feeling terrible. Her eyes were all puffy and piggy, and a nagging ache seemed to have taken up residence in the pit of her stomach. Bella identified it eventually as a feeling of sick despair.
And as if that wasn't bad enough, it was Monday morning and she had to go to work. Somehow she was going to have to get herself out of bed and pull herself together!
One look in the bathroom mirror was enough to convince her that she was going to have her work cut out. She looked almost as bad as she felt. Bella sighed.
She had to face Phoebe and Kate, too. They had insisted on coming round to hear about the trip that evening. 'And don't think you can get away with just telling us it was fine,' Phoebe's message had warned. 'We want to know
At least her eyes had gone down a bit by then, and she still had some colour from her days on the beach which helped disguise what would otherwise be a horribly white and strained face. Considering the oppressive cloud of misery that had been clinging to her all day and the rawness in her heart, Bella thought she looked pretty good.
Not that she fooled Kate and Phoebe for a minute. 'Bella, lovey, what on earth's happened?' asked Kate after one look at her face. 'You look absolutely terrible!'
'I don't look that bad, do I?' Bella asked Phoebe as she hugged her.
'Yes,' said Phoebe uncompromisingly. She held Bella at arm's length. 'What's wrong?'
Bella forced a bright smile. 'Nothing, unless you count my injury.' She showed them her bandaged foot. 'I'm not going to be able to wear any of my favourite shoes for ages.'
'That is bad,' agreed Kate.
'Exactly. Is it any wonder I'm not looking myself?'
'Well, come on, then.' They sat around the table where they had sat so many times when all three of them had shared the house and looked at Bella expectantly. 'Tell us all about it.'
'I don't really know where to start,' she said feebly.
'Start with the important thing,' advised Phoebe. 'How's Josh?'
'He's… He's…' Bella's throat closed so tight that she couldn't get any further. To her horror, her mouth began to wobble, and although she put up a hand to cover it, she couldn't hide the tears that scalded her eyes.
Phoebe looked at Kate. 'V &Ts all round, I think.'
'Yes please,' Bella managed to gasp. Now that she had started to cry she couldn't stop.
'I'll go,' said Kate, pushing back her chair.
There was a corner shop at the end of the road, and she was back a few minutes later, clutching several bottles of tonic. 'I brought chocolate too,' she said. 'I thought we might need it.'
Phoebe made the drinks and put a glass in front of Bella, who had given in completely by this stage and was sobbing with her head on the table. 'Come on, Bella,' she said, patting her on the back. 'This isn't like you. Here, have a drink.'
Bella lifted a blotched and tear-stained face and gulped immediately. It was so strong that she nearly choked, but when she had recovered, she took another, smaller, sip.
Silently, Kate handed her a box of tissues. Bella took one and blew her nose hard. 'Sorry,' she muttered, scrubbing at her cheeks with the crumpled tissue.
'We've all done it,' said Kate. 'Right here at this table too, in my case.'
Bella managed a watery smile. 'I remember.'
'And I seem to remember snivelling a bit over Gib,' said Phoebe, 'so we know what it's like.' She pulled out a chair and sat down next to Bella. 'Now,' she said firmly. 'You'd better tell us all about it.'
'Well!' exclaimed Kate when Bella had stumbled to the end of the story. 'I don't know why you're worrying, Bella. Even if we didn't know him, it's obvious that you're the one Josh loves.'
'Then why has he gone off with Aisling?' Bella demanded tearfully. 'He hasn't even rung to see if I got back OK.'
'You know, you could ring him,' Phoebe suggested gently.
'I can't,' she wailed. 'He's probably still in bed with Aisling, and even if he isn't, I can't start hassling him for attention. I said we would go back to being friends, but I'm not even sure I can do that now.' She groped miserably for another tissue.
'Of course you'll still be friends,' said Kate. 'You can't just stop being friends when you've been as close as you and Josh for all those years.'
'But that's the thing,' wept Bella. 'I don't think I can be friends if he's with Aisling. I couldn't bear seeing him with anyone now. But if we're not friends, I won't see him at all, and I couldn't bear that either. I don't know what to do,' she sobbed. 'I just know that I miss him, I miss him, I
Phoebe put an arm round her shoulder and exchanged a glance with Kate, who immediately launched into positive mode.
'I don't see Josh getting back together with Aisling,' she said. 'They never seemed that convincing as a couple. I never got the feeling they belonged together the way you and Josh do.'
'Kate's right,' said Phoebe, picking up the baton of encouragement. 'You and Josh are meant to be together and I'll bet you anything Josh knows that as well as you do.'
'Then why hasn't he rung?'
'Perhaps he's having problems getting rid of Aisling. You were the one who told us you thought he needed to be clear that relationship was over, so he probably feels that he has to sort that out and then he'll be round here like a
