Kill All the Lawyers

Steve swung the car off the causeway and onto Alton Road. They'd be at Joe's in three minutes. There'd be a line of tourists snaking through the bar and into the courtyard. But between Dennis the maitre d' and Bones the captain, Steve would manage to have his party seated within ninety seconds.

'I'm almost afraid to ask,' Victoria said.

'Kreeger killed two people, right?'

'Two you know about.'

'Right. Each one posed a threat. Jim Beshears was gonna blow the whistle on his phony research. Nancy Lamm was gonna report Kreeger's ethical violations. Suppose someone else poses a threat to him now?'

'What kind of threat?'

Victoria listened as Steve told her about Herbert trying to track down the charter boat captain who would have seen Kreeger brain Jim Beshears with the gaff.

As he went over the details, she began analyzing the plan in her logical way. Then she said, 'Even if you found the captain, even if he says, 'Yeah, I think Kreeger shoved the guy overboard, then purposely hit him,' a defense lawyer would slice him up. Why'd it take you all these years to come forward? Why doesn't the other witness, the girlfriend, corroborate your story? And all this assumes you can get an indictment, and the chances of that are-'

'Slim to none.'

'Right. So why do it?'

'If I tell you, take a deep breath and think it over before unloading on me.'

'So it's got to be illegal.'

'I told Dad to make sure he handed out my card everywhere he went, from Key Largo to Key West. Tell every drinker and fisherman and old salt that Stephen Solomon, Esquire, of Miami Beach, will pay a reward for finding Oscar De la Fuente, missing charter captain. Then I took an ad in the Key West Citizen and posted some notices on websites, saying the same thing.'

It only took her a second. 'You don't care if you find the guy! You just want Kreeger to know you're looking for him.'

'You're getting warmer. Keep going.'

'You're going to tell Kreeger you found De la Fuente, whether you do or not. You're going to say you have solid eyewitness evidence against him. You might even come up with a phony affidavit, De la Fuente swearing he heard Kreeger threaten Beshears, then saw Kreeger push him overboard before clobbering him.'

'Hadn't thought of the affidavit. Nice touch.'

'So this is your brilliant plan? To use yourself as bait. To get that psycho to try to kill you.'

He had a grin on his face that managed to be both childish and clueless. Like a boy who catches a viper and shows it to a girl in the misguided belief she will immediately want to start necking. 'I can't get him for either of the two murders he's committed, Vic. But I can get him for attempting a third.'

'Has it occurred to you that Kreeger might be better at committing murder than you are at preventing it?'

'I'll have an advantage Beshears and Lamm didn't have. I'll be sober, and I'll know what's coming.'

This time, she didn't try to cushion her words. 'You are utterly irresponsible. Even worse, you don't care about the people who love you.'

'Don't see how you can say that.'

'What about Bobby? What about your father? What about me? If you get hurt or killed, what about us?'

'Vic, I'm not scared of Kreeger. The guy's a coward who murdered a stoned woman in a hot tub and a drunk on a boat.'

They were the fifth car in line as they pulled up to valet parking in front of the restaurant. Patrons spilled out the doors and clogged the patio. On the outdoor speakers, they heard Dennis the maitre d' announce:

'Grossman party. Stuart Grossman. Party of eight.'

'Now, as for that other thing,' Steve said.

'What other thing?'

'The living-together thing. House versus condo.'

Wait a second, she thought. We're not through discussing your asinine plan. You can't move on to the next subject just because you've done your uber-male report-talk.

'I have this great compromise.' Steve sounded proud of himself. 'You like condos. Low maintenance. Lock and leave. And I respect that. But I like houses. Privacy. Mango tree in the backyard. So how about a townhouse?'

This isn't communication. This is the male of the species setting a brush fire, scorching the earth, and moving on.

'Steve, the townhouse can wait. We're not done here.'

Now they were second in line for the valet. She didn't have much time. 'You didn't even ask my opinion about your crazy plan, which, by the way, I think is suicidal. And now, what? Subject closed? Now we're supposed to talk about a townhouse and a hibiscus hedge?'

'I was thinking bougainvillea-'

'I'm serious. I'm really unhappy about this, and you'd better deal with it.'

Steve's eyes widened. Getting hit with a two-by-four will do that. He chewed at his lower lip a moment. Over the loudspeaker, 'Berkowitz party, Jeff Berkowitz. Party of six.'

'Okay, Vic. Here it is. There are three people in the world I dearly care about. Three people I love with all my heart. You and Bobby and my crazy father. You're the ones I'd take a bullet for.'

His words startled her. 'Is that literally true?'

He seemed to consider it a moment. 'Well, I'd take a bullet for you and Bobby. For my old man, I'd take a punch.'

He seemed sincere, she thought. No man had ever said anything like that to her, that her life was more important to him than his own.

'There are some concepts I care a helluva lot about, too,' he continued. 'That vague, shadowy thing we call justice. Seven years ago, I really screwed up. Everything you said the other day was right. I tried to convict my own client, and I was wrong. Now it's come back to haunt me. But I was right about one thing. Bill Kreeger is a killer. When I was at the radio station today, he mentioned Bobby and Dad by name. And he mentioned you, too, Vic.'

She felt a shiver go through her. 'Why?'

'Because he wanted me to know he could get to the three of you.'

'Did he make any threats?'

'He says I owe him for the six years he spent in prison. He's come back to collect the debt. Six years isn't something I can repay in cash, so I figure he wants to hurt me by going after someone I love. I can't sit back and do nothing. To keep him from coming after one of you, Vic, I need him to come after me.'

What could she say? Sure, he was being reckless, but it was a recklessness born of love and care and obligation. That was another aspect of the male of the species. Man, the protector.

'I still hate the idea of you doing this,' she said. 'Will you at least promise to be careful?'

'Hell, yes. I'll promise that and anything else you want.'

'Deal.' She gave Steve a soft smile just as the attendant opened the door. 'Promise to be nice to my mother tonight.'

Thirteen

THE QUEEN AND THE PIRATE

'You're looking lovely, Irene,' Steve said, on his best behavior.

'Thank you, Stephen,' Irene Lord replied with a smile as brittle as an icicle.

'And your dress.' Steve let out a whistle. 'What can I say?'