“You mean like six years ago?” she asked sweetly.
An expression of relief (no doubt that she’d
“Then you are a very ineffectual man, Caelis of the MacLeod. Six years ago, you had a choice indeed.”
“I told you—”
“That our laird denied us the right to marry in the clan,” she interrupted. “But what does that signify? Only that your love for his regard far exceeded any small feelings you might have had for me. You denied me.
“You do not understand.”
“You think not? I know this. Had the choice been mine six years ago, I would have run from the clan, abandoned my family and followed you across the waters if need be for us to be together. You wouldn’t even leave with me to another clan.”
“I could not!” His bellow was louder than hers, but she was not impressed.
“Then I say again, Caelis, you were a very ineffectual man. And I believed you a warrior at heart.”
“I am. How dare you doubt my fighting spirit!”
“How dare
She was not impressed.
“I thought he wanted only what was best for me. As you said, I was one of his favored ones. He claimed that as my alpha he could tell you were not my true mate. How was I supposed to know he lied?”
“You wanted to believe him. You wanted to believe that some in the clan were more important, superior to others. You wanted to be one of those
His face contorted as if holding something of great import back. Finally, he said, “I was.”
“I would say that I am sorry you lost your place, but I am not. The longer you held favor with that man, the more of your humanity you would have given up to him.”
“You do not know how true your words are,” Caelis said, his tone subdued, his face cast in shadows so she could not read his expression.
She had no answer for him. He had chosen, no matter that he claimed there had been none, and he had done so poorly.
He sat on the edge of her bed, leaving his scent behind, though she would not tell him so. She’d always been sensitive to it, reveling in his nearness even when she could not see him.
He looked down at the floor, as if it might have the answers he sought. “There are things I did not tell you then. Things you will have to know now.”
“You sound very mysterious.”
He nodded, his expression sober. “It is a great mystery, a secret the humans who are privileged to know must keep at the pain of death.”
“You say
His sense of superiority and excessive vanity might even rival Percival’s.
“Not better than—I understand that now—but not the same either.” Caelis’s expression pleaded with her for understanding.
But once again, his words were more confusion than explanation.
“Will you ever start making sense?” she demanded with asperity. “No matter what your exalted laird would have you believe, you are
“I am Chrechte,” Caelis blurted out with exasperation, jumping to his feet and turning away as if frustrated with her obdurate behavior.
Really? If he persisted in trying to unite them as a family, he would soon learn that she was capable of far more obstinacy than this.
And the whole Chrechte mystique? Not so mysterious after all. Everyone in the clan knew about the band of warriors that considered themselves elite among the soldiers.
She rolled her eyes. “So I heard on more than one occasion six years ago from you and others. You considered your skills as a warrior something to set you apart.”
He spun back to face her, his expression growing increasingly astonished as she continued speaking.
“My skills as a warrior
“And I am an English lady with claim to title and little else. Do you know how it has set me apart?” she asked scathingly. “Not one wee bit. I am still a mother, a friend, a woman with less say in my life than the steward who ran my dead husband’s estates.”
“You ignore everything you do not wish to hear,” he accused, his frustration obviously mounting.
She glared at him, her own ire rising to match his. “If you want me to
“I am no idiot!”
“Well, you’re certainly not a lord of logic, either.”
“I am a shape-changer,” he practically yelled. “Chrechte means I share my nature with an animal. Mine is a wolf.”
Her heart nearly stopped in her chest. She’d called him daft, but she hadn’t meant it. Had not truly believed he had lost his ability to think and behave rationally.
His talk now made her cold with dread.
“Stop this nonsense. Please, Caelis, do not show yourself truly insane,” she pleaded with him.
He simply shook his head and then removed his plaid with an economy of movement. He made no move to come closer to her, but she jumped off the chest anyway, sidling toward the door and escape.
“No. Caelis. I will not take you to my bed.”
“Aye. You will, but not right now.”
She shook her head, her heart beating so fast in her chest that it hurt.
He lifted his head, sniffing at the air and then looked with concern at her. “You have nothing to fear, Shona. Not ever from me.”
“You have hurt me more than any other,” she baldly disagreed.
That was one lie she simply could not let stand.
“Let me show you why.”
What did he expect her to do? Give him permission? She just wanted out of the room, but before she could make her move for the unbarred door, a flash of light shown around Caelis.
Then, where he had stood was now a large dark-haired wolf.
One must have grave reason for revealing the knowledge of the Chrechte’s true nature to a human. For to betray that knowledge carelessly is to invite certain death.
—CHRECHTE ORAL TRADITIONS
Perhaps it was
